Is it too early to legally change my name and gender?

[rlacy2018]

I know this is probably just my decision, and my decision alone, but I gotta look for advice lol.

I'm 19, I'll have been on hormones for 4 months on Tuesday. I've been really wanting to change my name and gender legally, especially since I plan on applying for a new job soon (with a sheriff's office). That's honestly the main reason I want to do it right now, and not wait.

It's just such a semi-permanent, big decision to make. I haven't really had doubts about my transition, though my identity is more fluid than 100% female, but I'd say 70-80% female, so it works out haha. I'm just scared I'll have to go back. I don't see why, and like I said, I haven't had doubts, but it just scares me, I overthink, and am very indecisive.

- Abby

[Dena]

Be warned that the sheriff's office will probably want to run a background check on you. To do this you will need to provide any names you have used in the past. Failure to do so could result in you losing your job. As for being able to change your records, it depends on where you live. Some states require surgery before you can change your gender and 3 states will not permit the gender to be changed. Name changes should be possible but in many states you need to appear before a judge as part of the process.

[rlacy2018]

Be warned that the sheriff's office will probably want to run a background check on you. To do this you will need to provide any names you have used in the past. Failure to do so could result in you losing your job. As for being able to change your records, it depends on where you live. Some states require surgery before you can change your gender and 3 states will not permit the gender to be changed. Name changes should be possible but in many states you need to appear before a judge as part of the process.

Yeah I'm definitely aware that the previous information is gonna come up. And I wasn't really asking if I can, but rather if I should haha.

[KimOct]

Lacy - As for your name - that is not a big deal - easy to do.  Mine in MN was $342 for the court fee.  You can change your name to anything you want no matter how unusual.

Birth certificate is a much bigger deal.  It depends on what state issued your BC.  And it varies A LOT depending on the state.

Some states are very easy others are nearly impossible.  Some just want documentation from a therapist.  Some require GRS.  Some like Texas and Kentucky are nearly impossible.  Mine was from Illinois.  My orchiectomy qualified as GRS so they did it with a notarized letter from the surgeon.

As for if you think the time is right for YOU that is a question only you can answer.

[christinej78]

Lacy - As for your name - that is not a big deal - easy to do.  Mine in MN was $342 for the court fee.  You can change your name to anything you want no matter how unusual.

Birth certificate is a much bigger deal.  It depends on what state issued your BC.  And it varies A LOT depending on the state.

Some states are very easy others are nearly impossible.  Some just want documentation from a therapist.  Some require GRS.  Some like Texas and Kentucky are nearly impossible.  Mine was from Illinois.  My orchiectomy qualified as GRS so they did it with a notarized letter from the surgeon.

As for if you think the time is right for YOU that is a question only you can answer.

Hi Kim,                          07 January 2019

I'm from Texas and from what I have learned from my counselor and other members of our community this just isn't so.

Here's what I have been told: Fort worth has a judge that makes things difficult, If you want to move quickly, go to Austin and it can be done in hours.

I'm originally from Ohio, a good place to be from; far away from. They have a person with an agenda that runs the department that oversees birth certificates. He will not approve a gender change on a birth certificate. It'll probably take a federal lawsuit to make this agenda driven hack shift gears.

I believe there are only three states that have an issue, Ohio being one of them, every other state allows it.

My plan is to change my name and gender this month. I'll let you know how it goes.

Best Always, Love
Christine

[tgchar21]

Be warned that the sheriff's office will probably want to run a background check on you. To do this you will need to provide any names you have used in the past. Failure to do so could result in you losing your job.

It's more than likely (but not impossibly) too late in the OP's case (especially for that kind of job), but often times if your name was changed before you had any background-check-relevant records* they aren't interested in knowing the old name. (My suggestion is if you transitioned as a child or teenager and this would be applicable in your case is instead of leaving off your birth name "cold turkey" ask HR whether or not you need to provide a former name that was changed at age x and that no relevant records would be under* - without the need to mention the name itself or why it was changed it at this point. If they say no you don't need to provide such a name, and then they turn around and not hire/fire you over it, you have proof that they're discriminating against you because you're transgender.) Source: I had a (non-trans-related) name change at a similar age and in all but one case from my personal experience they weren't interested in knowing my birth name; I'm writing this more for other young transitioners who may be reading this.

*In general this means that any references or former employers can be contacted with your current name, any educational credentials they want to verify were established under or have been changed to your current name, you have no criminal history whatsoever (no matter how minor) under your old name, and if they want to check your credit history or other facts about your background all of that would be under your current name.

[christinej78]

It's more than likely (but not impossibly) too late in the OP's case (especially for that kind of job), but often times if your name was changed before you had any background-check-relevant records* they aren't interested in knowing the old name. (My suggestion is if you transitioned as a child or teenager and this would be applicable in your case is instead of leaving off your birth name "cold turkey" ask HR whether or not you need to provide a former name that was changed at age x and that no relevant records would be under* - without the need to mention the name itself or why it was changed it at this point. If they say no you don't need to provide such a name, and then they turn around and not hire/fire you over it, you have proof that they're discriminating against you because you're transgender.) Source: I had a (non-trans-related) name change at a similar age and in all but one case from my personal experience they weren't interested in knowing my birth name; I'm writing this more for other young transitioners who may be reading this.

*In general this means that any references or former employers can be contacted with your current name, any educational credentials they want to verify were established under or have been changed to your current name, you have no criminal history whatsoever (no matter how minor) under your old name, and if they want to check your credit history or other facts about your background all of that would be under your current name.

Hi tgchar21,                              08 January 2019

I have been in the military, held TS clearances, worked as a consultant for the Navy holding TS clearances, and have been a cop. DO NOT try to get by not reporting everything. If they find something you didn't report after you have been hired, it's out the door with an escort. Once you have been caught lying on a Background Check, you have just excluded yourself from consideration for any job requiring BG Checks. The truth always wins. Pay attention to what Dena said and don't try cutting corners because you will lose if you do.

Best Always, Love
Chris

[tgchar21]

Hi tgchar21,                              08 January 2019

I have been in the military, held TS clearances, worked as a consultant for the Navy holding TS clearances, and have been a cop. DO NOT try to get by not reporting everything. If they find something you didn't report after you have been hired, it's out the door with an escort. Once you have been caught lying on a Background Check, you have just excluded yourself from consideration for any job requiring BG Checks. The truth always wins. Pay attention to what Dena said and don't try cutting corners because you will lose if you do.

Best Always, Love
Chris

Good point, but I'd like to clarify some things:
1) What you're talking about are security clearances and the like, where they DO want EVERY name you've used in any way (even nicknames, etc.) - and what you/Dena said would be 100% applicable in those cases (and the OP's potential law enforcement job would probably fall under that scope). I was referring to more typical background checks where they're just verifying your credentials and running a quick criminal history check.
2) Even for more routine background checks, if the name change took place as an adult (especially within the past several years) it would indeed probably be relevant and what you said would be applicable. I was referring to name changes done before (or in some cases right after) turning 18 where you wouldn't have any relevant records under the old name. Sources: 1 and 2 (both from people with management/HR experience).
3) Mainly as a defense to an employer finding a technicality behind closed doors to discriminate against you, I recommended instead of just leaving off the name to ask HR if you need to include a name changed at such point or not before completing the form. With this you aren't "lying" if they say the name doesn't need to be included in your case (this would be no different than asking about any other application question you are unsure of how to answer). Just be honest about the facts behind your question and don't leave out any relevant facts (e.g. don't say that everything relevant is under the current name if that's not true).

[CindyLouFromCO]

Yes, ask and find out.

Like others have said they will find out if they do a background check.  All court records are online.  So if they search your name in the system a record will come up with your court record saying something like "Petition to change name."  That record will show old name and new name.

My BF was a prosecutor for many years.  He worked with the police daily.  They really don't care about stuff like this.  I can't see them discriminating because of a name change.  They deal with murders, human trafficking and people that have sex with children.  I guess if you're in a small town than maybe.  It really does not matter though.  They will find out about your name change wherever you work.  Anyone that knows your name dead name or new name can go to online courts for your state and look up your name.

So maybe get the job first, then change your name if you are worried about discrimination during the hiring process.

[tgchar21]

CindyLou - some (but definitely not all) places do now allow transgender people to seal their name change records (but that does not affect whether or not an employer has a practical reason to know your dead name). My tactic about asking first is a way, given the age the name change took place, to see if the name would be relevant or not without immediately outing yourself.

[Devlyn]

I know this is probably just my decision, and my decision alone, but I gotta look for advice lol.

I'm 19, I'll have been on hormones for 4 months on Tuesday. I've been really wanting to change my name and gender legally, especially since I plan on applying for a new job soon (with a sheriff's office). That's honestly the main reason I want to do it right now, and not wait.

It's just such a semi-permanent, big decision to make. I haven't really had doubts about my transition, though my identity is more fluid than 100% female, but I'd say 70-80% female, so it works out haha. I'm just scared I'll have to go back. I don't see why, and like I said, I haven't had doubts, but it just scares me, I overthink, and am very indecisive.

- Abby

I'm not sure if you're asking if 19 is too early for a name change, or if 4 months on HRT is too early. I did my name change and was presenting full-time female long before I sought medical care for transition. Work was fine with my name and gender changes, I was with a DoD contractor. Good luck with your decision!

Hugs, Devlyn

[tgchar21]

I'm not sure if you're asking if 19 is too early for a name change, or if 4 months on HRT is too early.
Hugs, Devlyn

If anything at your age it's better to change your name now than wait another few years, as you'll have less of a paper trail established and there would be less suspicion of fraudulent intent from the judge.

[Devlyn]

If anything at your age it's better to change your name now than wait another few years, as you'll have less of a paper trail established and there would be less suspicion of fraudulent intent from the judge.

I assume you're addressing the O/P, not me?

[tgchar21]

I assume you're addressing the O/P, not me?

Correct.

[tgchar21]

Another thing that CindyLou hinted to: Usually questions about previous names are asked as a means to verify information, not an end to base a hiring decision on (c.f. questions about criminal or employment history). If you have some reason you'd prefer not to divulge a previous name unless absolutely necessary (e.g. a transgender person who prefers not to out themselves if possible) what I'm suggesting are "alternate modes of transportation" (asking beforehand if a name changed at such time/age would actually be relevant or not, asking to provide the name directly to the investigator, etc.) but I'm not advocating omitting a name if it would "change the destination" (e.g. they would not be made aware of material facts regarding your background*).

*I do know of a transwoman who got fired for not disclosing her dead name, but she was also attempting to hide other "destination" facts (in her case namely the fact she had applied there before when she was living as a male when they asked if you'd ever applied there before).

[christinej78]

Not trying to start an argument here but honesty is usually the best policy. If you are applying for a job as a Law Enforcement Officer (LEO), you best disclose everything or else you subject yourself to firing at any point they discover an untruth or omission. Once fired, don't expect other agencies to be anxious to hire you.

It's you and your reputation that's on the line. Do what you want, just don't complain when they call you to the front office and then walk you back to your office so you can clean out your desk so they can then escort you to the front door.

I've seen it happen for something as simple as misstating employment dates and previous salary.

These are my opinions, everyone has them. As I stated previously: "Do what you want."

Best Always, Love
Chris

[tgchar21]

Not trying to start an argument here but honesty is usually the best policy. If you are applying for a job as a Law Enforcement Officer (LEO), you best disclose everything or else you subject yourself to firing at any point they discover an untruth or omission. Once fired, don't expect other agencies to be anxious to hire you.

It's you and your reputation that's on the line. Do what you want, just don't complain when they call you to the front office and then walk you back to your office so you can clean out your desk so they can then escort you to the front door.

I've seen it happen for something as simple as misstating employment dates and previous salary.

These are my opinions, everyone has them. As I stated previously: "Do what you want."

Best Always, Love
Chris

Would they do that if for example the phone number you put down wasn't technically yours, but it was the one where they would be the most likely to reach you? Or using the example on names, what about if you were given a temporary "placeholder" name at birth until a final decision on your name was made between your parents (or you were put up for adoption) and you fail to disclose that temporary name that has no relevance whatsoever in your adult life?

And, for the record, I am NOT recommending lying or omitting information without asking first. What I've said is when you go to fill out the application, and your name was changed as a child or teenager and everything relevant would be under your current name, contact someone in HR or who would be doing the investigation and ask something like "My name was legally changed when I was <insert age> years old and all of my work history, educational credentials since high school, and other background-check-relevant records are under my current name. Do I need to disclose my former/birth name or not?".

[christinej78]

Would they do that if for example the phone number you put down wasn't technically yours, but it was the one where they would be the most likely to reach you? Or using the example on names, what about if you were given a temporary "placeholder" name at birth until a final decision on your name was made between your parents (or you were put up for adoption) and you fail to disclose that temporary name that has no relevance whatsoever in your adult life?

And, for the record, I am NOT recommending lying or omitting information without asking first. What I've said is when you go to fill out the application, and your name was changed as a child or teenager and everything relevant would be under your current name, contact someone in HR or who would be doing the investigation and ask something like "My name was legally changed when I was <insert age> years old and all of my work history, educational credentials since high school, and other background-check-relevant records are under my current name. Do I need to disclose my former/birth name or not?".

It is up to each individual how they are going to answer questions on a BG check. Do what you think best. I know how I handled my BG information.

One piece of advice I can offer: If you take the BG form home to fill out, make a couple blank copies first, then fill them out as work copies. When you're satisfied with your answers, fill out the original with the answers you put on the work copies. When done make a couple copies of the original you're going to submit. Save those copies for yourself. Keep them for future reference when filling out other BG check forms. Government agencies do cross checks.

One last item: The truth is easy to remember. Lies beget more lies and will trip you up during an interview. We haven't discussed that part. Most jobs requiring BG checks also have interviews after the BG check has been completed. This is a good place to get tripped up. And guess what, if you give a wrong answer you will not be told where you screwed up and you won't get the job.

As I said, Do what you want.

Best Always, love
Chris

[tgchar21]

Christine, I get your "honesty is the best policy" philosophy, but since I haven't seen the word "name" not even once in any of your replies to me, it looks like you're dodging the particular issue being discussed here (not disclosing a former name that is indicative of one's medical history until if and when it's absolutely necessary, or one that you were only known by when you were a child). This is not like fudging work dates or salary history (using examples you gave previously) where one is trying to misrepresent themselves for gain.

I'm not even trying to convince the OP that he should heed my advice (and like I said they probably WOULD be interested in knowing his dead name at this point for a LEO job), but rather that there is a difference between omitting/lying about pertinent information vs. wanting to minimize disclosure of information that is of a sensitive nature and/or most likely irrelevant in the particular context (especially with "lower security" jobs where the background check is just a cursory criminal history check and verifying your work history/credentials).

[Devlyn]

It is up to each individual how they are going to answer questions on a BG check. Do what you think best. I know how I handled my BG information.

One piece of advice I can offer: If you take the BG form home to fill out, make a couple blank copies first, then fill them out as work copies. When you're satisfied with the your answers, fill out the original with the answers you put on the work copies. When done make a couple copies of the original your are going to submit. Save those copies for yourself. Keep them for future reference when filling other BG check forms. Government agencies do cross checks.

One last item: The truth is easy to remember. Lies beget more lies and will trip you up during an interview. We haven't discussed that part. Most jobs requiring BG checks also have interviews after the BG check has been completed. This is a good place to get tripped up. And guess what, if you give a wrong answer you will not be told where you screwed up and you won't get the job.

As I said, Do what you want.

Best Always, love
Chris

Amen! Those are words I live by. You WILL remember what happened. Other versions, not so much.