"...to me"

[madison]

Especially in light of some recent discussions having gotten a little heated, and a lot to do with the fact that I listen to a lot of talk radio, I am curious about something.

When you make statements and have discussions, is there any implied, "...to me," at the end of your opinions?

Examples:

Short skirts look bad and juvenile (to me).
George W. Bush seems to be a divisive president (to me).
Gender has nothing to do with sex (to me).
(It seems)(to me) transgendered people should seek therapy to cure themselves.

This question came to my mind recently listening to talk radio, and came up again today reading over some forum threads here.

I'm not sure if it is a new thing, but it definitely seems (to me) as though more and more people in modern society make factual statements out of opinions and personal preference/beliefs. Every statement people make, no matter how opinionated, lacks the implied "to me" at the end. Instead it becomes a statement of absolute truth, which by it's very nature is argumentative. Lack of the implied "to me" precludes the possibility for any rational debate.

That is how it seems to me.

And how does it seem...to you?








Note: The examples are merely for entertainment purposes only and do not necessarily reflect the opinions or views of this station or even the author of said examples. Any investments should be well researched before any significant money is committed. Your experiences may vary.

[Dennis]

Short guys are sexier. And that's an absolute truth.

Dennis

[madison]

Dennis has a Napoleon Complex.

Sidebar: Does anybody remember the, "It's a fact," girl from Kids in the Hall?

[Dennis]

I loved Kids in the Hall. Love this quote:

You have such lovely hair. Especially for a demon.

Dennis

[Louise]

"There is no truth.  There are only points of view."  Friedrich Nietzsche

This is the motto of post-Modernism.  On the other hand the conservative reaction to post-Modernism is an insistence on absolute truth--whether the truth is religious, political, economic, social, aesthetic, scientific, or whatever.  Actually I think both sides cut off the possibility of rational discussion.  The conservative dogmatist thinks he already has the truth and sees the only point of argument as conversion to his dogma.  The post-Modern relativist doesn't value discussion, since there is no place to go--at the end one is no closer to an illusory truth than at the beginning, it's all just opinion.  There is another way, the path of Plato, Aristotle, Abelard, Descartes, Newton, Locke, Kant, and others.  This approach holds both to the goal of an objective truth and to the humble admission that I am not there just yet.  You will not find too many of these folks on talk radio.  Loud opinion sells, quiet discussion is considered boring.  Instead of talk radio, try reading a book.

Excuse me, but I had to get this out of me.  It is Friday afternoon and after a long week I just need to kick back and relax.  Today is the first opportunity I have had to wear a skirt and makeup in two weeks.

[madison]

Very poignant observations Louise; and I couldn't agree more. And that was the point. As I am wont to do, I like inspiring and engaging actively in thoughtful discussion.

However, don't think for a second I have any problem with talk radio. There is little better entertainment out there. I only get scared when I see everyday people engaging in the same inflamed dialogue in their personal lives, and hence the bigger picture behind my post.

And Louise, to me, the only thing better than getting pretty and sexy is to do it with a cosmopolitan in hand! Enjoy your weekend!

Oh, and Dennis, "I'm not being sarcastic. No!!! This is just a little speech impediment I can't help."*



* For this and more fun Kids in the Hall quotes you can use on a fun and relaxing weekend or around the office, please visit The Kids in the Hall Quotes and More page. The author of this post is in no way related to the site being linked to or it's contents and will receive no direct compensation for your visiting said site. And I am not a spy. Just because we are from Canada does not mean we are spies!

[caitlyn]

You know Madison, there is a spoil sport in every crowd!   Here I thought all those statements I have been reading, and hearing in the news were actually factual; and now I find out there was an implied "to me" missing and they were only opinion.  The shock wave from this ranks with the blow I received when I found I could not pass the pencil test.  Is this a sadistic and cunning Plan by members of this web site to chip away at my Ego? 

Please help me Kind Sir, I am only a poor waif out here on the cold (well Cool) all right its now warm street, {so its a house I am almost on the street) trying to find my way, and shocks like this can only send me back into my shell.


In order to prevent shocks like this in the future I well remember that all Writing must be factual, with out any implied "to me".  However, I still can't agree with the short men, statement; the correct response should have been "tall men are hot" or something like that, but at my age by now I have forgotten what this post was all about any way. 

Have a great weekend,  with Regards Caitlyn.

[Dennis]

I'm sorry, Caitlyn, but you are clearly suffering from either a vision problem or psychiatric problem if you are unable to see the simple truth about short men and sexiness. It's an objectively verifiable fact.

That is all.

Dennis

[madison]

Yes, Caitlyn, there is in fact a cunning and sadistic plan to chip away at your ego!

Wait a minute, you weren't being sarcastic were you? You were, weren't you?

Hmmm, I must gather my forces together as I think Caitlyn is attempting to undermine my ego in retaliation for my plotting to chip away at her ego. That sneaky little @#$%&!

To me, this thread went silly. And I thank you all very much. I haven't laughed this much since about 11:30 this morning.

And that's a fact!




Posted at: 2006.04.21, 04:22:37"...psychiatric problem if you are unable to see the simple truth about short men and sexiness. It's an objectively verifiable fact."

You guys are killing me. Honest to god, LOL!

[Dennis]

I'm sorry, I can't. I'm too sexy and must save up for shoe lifts so that I can stop the women from beating down my door.

Dennis

[Chaunte]

"...To ME! ...To me!"
My thoughts all end "...to me!"
If its implied or said.
Its all "... to me!"

Sung to the tune of "Tonight" from West Side Story.

Sometimes "... to me" leads the sentence.

(To me...) I look better in longer skirts than in short ones.
(To me...) From a distance, I look like a typical overweight, middle-aged woman.
(To me...) Short guys can be cute.

Chaunte

[Robyn]

I try to remember to add "IMHO."  If I don't, please do it for me.




Posted at: April 22, 2006, 07:58:44 PMAnd Louise...

I'm sorry that you have been unable to be enfemme for two weeks.  I remember those pressures.

It is no longer a consideration, thank goodness.  The only concern now is which outfit to put out the nighrt before and which jewelry to wear when getting ready for work.  Makeup is a brow pencil to hide the white, a little blush to help cover the bags under my old eyes, and lipstick that is gone with the first cup of tea in the office.

One of the things that surprised me when I went full time was how soon it wasn't about the clothes anymore.  I've heard the same observation from many (older) MTFs.  My husband doesn't care much about clothes, either, his or mine.  But every once in awhile his 5% gay streak comes out when buying nice shirts (usually at GoodWill or off the 70% off rack at Mervyns or Target.

"That outfit looks nice on you," he'll say.  "So did the last one.  Can we go now?"

I am a bit more concerned about what to wear tomorrow night to the birthday party of a 100 year old friend.  You see, my ex-wife will be there; so I have to look good.  Classy.  I know my husband will look great.

[stephanie_craxford]

Hello Madison.

...to me

I believe that what you are commenting on is as a result of many people feeling that their opinion, belief or statement is in fact the only right one

Personally, unless I quote a source, my statements are simply my opinions based on my current knowledge of the subject, or my personal experience with the subject.  And I usually prefix these statements with words such as "personally", "I believe", or "many others have experienced" etc.  You get the drift

Steph

[Celia]

Anyone who sings "You are so beautiful . . . " as she gazes into the mirror should always remember the words that follow.

-Celia

[Kate]

Instead it becomes a statement of absolute truth...

Zen has a lot to say on this. Or maybe it has nothing to say at all. Or was it both? No wait, neither it was!

I have a similar tactic: I mentally preface every statement with "It's as if..."

Words are art as metaphors. Words as "truth" tend to kill the things they point at.

Try it! (it's as if) the world of myth & metaphor is hugely more fun than fact and truth.

IMHO.

[Chaunte]

Anyone who sings "You are so beautiful . . . " as she gazes into the mirror should always remember the words that follow.

-Celia

ROFL!!!!

I think if I was to do that (...to me?  ... to myself?  i am SO confused!), the mirror would shatter - and not because of my voice either!

Chaunte

[Annie Social]

The only problem I have with the "...to me" approach is that it's sometimes used as a way of ignoring facts one doesn't like. An example: I was reading a discussion elsewhere in which one person stated that evolution was widely accepted before Darwin's Origin of Species. Another person immediately chimed in, "Well, that's your opinion". No it's not; it's an easily verifiable fact. Evolution was widely accepted; it was the mechanism by which it worked that was widely debated.

Note that this says nothing about whether this acceptance was correct (although I believe it was); the point is that a simple observable fact is too often negated these days by someone calling it an opinion.

That said, I agree with Madison that the reverse is certainly true. Too many people tend to confuse their prejudices and beliefs with objective truth and 'natural law', and take the position that anyone who sees things differently is deluded or in denial.

Annie

PS... Sometimes it seems that Kids in the Hall is becoming the new Monty Python!

[madison]

Annie, you make an excellent point that cannot be refuted. One could just as easily dismiss the "facts" by implying that a "fact" is an opinion. That is a tactic/problem that I would expect the same people SHOUTING opinion and preference as fact to use.

In case the point was lost in poor communication on my part, people often get the most upset/heated/angry when they are espousing opinions in the wiley guise of facts, and hence take things way too emotionally/personally.

As for Kids in the hall becoming the new Monty Python: hush your mouth! Do you want the inquistors to come? They are evil! They will use their supreme weapons upon us: Fear, Surprise, and Ruthless Efficiency!

NOBODY expects the spanish inquisition!

And that's a fact!