To assume I'd come out to them would be to assume my folks are reasonable people, which unfortunately, they are not. They're highly conservative Christians, and refuse to accept anything that deviates from their perfect picture of reality. If I told them, they'd disown me. And I'm just not stable enough to deal with that.
To answer your question, Nero, yeah, I should be able to get online still, but my computer crashed today because of a virus and apparently killed all my files, so I don't know exactly how easy it'll be. I was amazed I could actually get online still. Good birthday present....
My folks do push me into acting feminine, at least in certain situations, and even worse still, they push me into acting submissive. My brother is 16, and he, by their rules, is the master of the television and any other space that might be occupied within the house (with the exception of my parents' bedroom, of course). I can't count how many times I had to watch Conan O'Brien when I was last home for a couple weeks. Don't get me wrong, I like Conan, but this was also when my brother was keeping me from my crime shows with his X-Box (I'm not into video games). My mother, especially, pushes me into gender norms... she says that men are more important than women, and thus women should obey men (and I guess then it would make sense for me to tell her I'm TS so I get the power... no...). It's ridiculous. The worst thing, though, is shopping. I start going anywhere near the men's clothing, and she protests; I won't even look at magazines or movies anymore when shopping with my mom for fear she might catch me looking too long at a pic of some hot chick. It's just a lot of conforming.
But yeah, Nero, I'm still me, I'm still Rafe. I'm just Rafe repressed.
