whoops..
I didnt mean to put the message across that I had found my soulmate. I dont believe in soulmates. My experience was more trying to show how honest I had tried to be before moving and being with her. The prior relationships I had been in, I had not been honest and forward with. The one prior relationship I had been in, she was not told until much later. We probably wouldn't have got together had she known this first. Even if it would have, telling her later had betrayed her trust and things could never fix themselves after that. My original thoughts at the time with my first relationship were that my personality was the same and that she would maybe accept me because I felt I was the same person. This did not happen.
This time with my current partner, I didnt want to make that mistake, especially with something as important as my gender identity.
As for the relationship, we have had our ups and downs. Some major things. My gender identity hasnt been a factor, unlike my last relationship.
I would go so far as to say now, that any transgender person should never get together with a partner without their knowledge of their transgenderness and knowing how far you would go. From what I have read in other posts and many websites, similar things happen. Had I had the internet back then, and knew how relationships go with deceptions of gender, I wouldn't have done it I dont think. Back at that time however was pre internet and I did not know about other's experiences.
I dont believe in soulmates. Rather in compatible personalities, shared interests, laws of attractions, sexual compatibility, trust, honesty, romantic efforts, actions to promote honest relationship, and just some plain random luck.
If a transgender out their is thinking of making a major move in a relationship with someone, that doesnt know of whats inside of you and what will come out, its wrong and a major deception to yourself and partner. Even with their prior knowledge, things are going to be tough enough. With all the efforts to have transgender (any on the polarity, spectrum, continuum, or spheres) become more socially accepted, honesty before relationships, and removing the deception, I believe has to happen in a broad community wide way. That is in my opinion, what one of the key elements must be in order for this to happen.
