New Corrupt-A-Wish

[fae_reborn]

Granted, you didn't loose your voice.  But now instead of talking normally, you sing everything in opera. 

I wish that Disney didn't give me false hopes about finding love.

[Unconditional Acceptance]

Granted, they give you the painful truth instead.

I wish I could permanently slack off on my homework without consequences.

[fae_reborn]

Granted.  You can permanently slack off on your homework.  You graduate from school and begin a great job.  But you regret not learning in school what others around you did.

I wish someone would buy me flowers for no reason at all.

[Unconditional Acceptance]

Granted; because they were bought for no reason and feel worthless, they wilt an hour after you receive them.

I wish I could go swimming.

[Dante]

Granted, you can go swimming, but the water freezes while you are inside. See you in a thousand years! 

I wish my parents understood how hard this is for me. 

[V M]

Granted...Your folks are totally understanding to the point it drives you up the wall

I wish the people I'm attracted to would be attracted to me

[Dante]

Granted, but all they want is to get you in bed. Nothing else.

I wish my school would close for the rest of the year.

[kody2011]

granted but you now have to go to school for two extra years to make up for it.

i wish i could get some sleep.

[Michelle.]

Granted... but you oversleep and miss out on the most important event in your entire life.

I wish for no hurricanes this year...

[Dante]

Granted, no hurricanes. But there are Tsunami's that are somehow able to crash over the entire continent, instead of just the coast.

I wish it weren't so damn hot here! 

[kody2011]

ok, but now it's so cold that it's like the norht pole....

i wish my parents didn't steal my horse and dog....

[V M]

Granted... But horse stealin' is a hanging offense

Wish I was a girl in her Early 20's and could get pregnant

[Unconditional Acceptance]

Granted, you're in your early 20s and able to get pregnant, but no one wants to sleep with you.

I wish my history teacher wasn't such a f***ing retard.

[Constance]

I wish my history teacher wasn't such a f***ing retard.

Granted: you are instead.

I wish the phone switch at work would crash.

[fae_reborn]

granted, it crashes and as a result your company goes out of business and you are laid off.

I wish I knew what to do: move home or risk moving to a new place with no money.

[Osiris]

Granted, you know what you need to do but end up doing the opposite.

I wish I could get motivated to finish this painting.

[kody2011]

ok, you get motivated to finish it and do, but nobody likes it...not even you

I wish I could have the nerve to actually discuss this stuff with my parents.

[V M]

Granted.... You get your nerve up, but your folks are completely bored and walk off saying "tell us something we didn't know"

I wish my neighbors would just talk to each other rather than yell loudly up and down the hallway early in the morning

[fae_reborn]

Granted, now they yell loudly in the evening, preventing you from getting any sleep at all.

I wish it was easier for me to accept reality instead of escaping into what could be.

[V M]

They already do that, and I rarely get much sleep

Granted..... You accept reality for what it is but don't like it

I wish it was easier to shave my dog's winter coat