Legal question about wills & such.

[BrandiOK]

  I've been thinking about my recent health issues including the lastest problem with my heart arrythmia.  While I don't anticipate dieing anytime really soon I have been thinking a lot about making sure my affairs are in order.

  I have no idea what I need to do in order to make sure my wishes are carried out upon my death.  Do I have to have a will? And if so is there any way to do that myself without a lawyer (no money)?  While my assests are meager I would like to make sure that there are no fights or arguements concerning my property between my genetic family and my "adopted" family. 

  Also...probably more importantly...I had a friend who was TS that died early this year.  She was a beautiful young woman who had lived fulltime for many many years.  Although she was pre-op she had already had breast implants and FFS I believe.  She was unclockable I don't care how long you stared at her.   She was so pretty and after her death from a brain aneurism her mother stepped in and somehow legally took charge of everything.  She banned all my friends "family and friends" from attending the funeral and she also had them prepare the body so she was buried as male.  I can't imagine what kind off horrible things they must have done to her to make her presentable as male.  I do NOT want this to happen to me.  I need to know if anyone knows if there is a way to keep this from happening?  I wouldn't put it past my family to pull the same thing in the event of my death.

  I realize this seems a bit morbid but over the last couple days I've had look at my own mortality really hard and I'm so unprepared.  I don't think I can have any real peace until I know my "family" is taken care of and that should something happen my wishes will be honored.

[tinkerbell]

I don't know if the procedure is the same in every state, but in my case, I do have a will because the person shown as my beneficiary is not a family member nor a close relative.  It is best to check with your attorney to be sure.


tinkerbell

[LynnER]

My will is written, and has been for years.... My best friend is executor of the estate and knows exactly what to do.... He will respect my wishes 

[Buffy]

Hi BrandiOK..

I have had a will well before I transitioned and changed this when I legally changed my name, so as to update the content as well. The executor is my solicitor in the UK, I have given two copies to my best friends, one in the UK one here.

I have seen several cases of dying intestate, where no will has been made and relatives are bickering and argueing over who get what.

The thought of being buried as Male always bothered me, although this is no longer an issue as my birth certificate has been legally changed to "Girl"

Becky

[cindianna_jones]

Nolo Press has all kinds of legal forms that you can get online for little cost.  For the will you will likely need a witness and to have it notarized.

www dot nolopress dot com

You will need to have legal documents to prevent the things that you are worried about.  You should have some means of notification to your will executor if you die as well.  If your executor (who can be anyone) doesn't know about your demise and your will, then it won't have any effect.  Your family will then be able to do what they will with you.

Cindi

Hey... this should go in the wiki.  There is nothing there about wills!

[Buffy]

Hey... this should go in the wiki.  There is nothing there about wills!

Yep... Noted Cindi

Becky

[stephanie_craxford]

Hey... this should go in the wiki.  There is nothing there about wills!

Great idea Cindi, lets see what we can come up with.

Steph

[Rana]

Dennis, this would be a topic that would benefit greatly from your input I consider.

I am assuming that the legal situation is the same in the US as in Australia,  that you can purchase "do it yourself" will kits,  have the completed will properly witnessed and thats it.

However the situation referred to re Brandi's friend is more sinister - how could you prevent that happening?

Rana

[Dennis]

The executor is the one who has control over the memorial, so with Brandi's friend, if there had been a different executor, the problem would have been avoided. You should specify that in your will.

You'd need to check your local requirements, but a will does not have to be drafted or witnessed by a lawyer in many jurisdictions, including the one I live in. If you do get a form for a will, make sure it is specific to your jurisdiction. I'd check bookstores before looking online, just because they're more likely to actually be valid where you live.

Dennis

[seldom]

This is STILL one of the big issues for TS.  I will tell you as a lawyer that there is no real easy way to navigate it.  Every state is very differant.  Some states have decisions that go completely against transsexuals and other states have more liberal precident.  This is why it is very important that you are actively aware of the laws in the state you are in or move too if you are transitioning.  In some cases the family can take precidence over a will (basically discard it) if you are a TS and completely cut off your partner and your friends, be it you are a post-op or pre-op.  The laws are highly discriminatory in most states.

That is why I suggest many TS to move to queer friendly states and cities.  Estate issues are probably one of the biggest legal hurdles that TS people face. 

This is very state by state but here is a short breakdown of states I know have TS friendly legislation regarding estates:

Illinois
California
New York
Mass.
Vermont


Unfriendly states
Texas
Alabama
Wisconsin
Arkansas
Kansas
Missouri
Tenn.
Miss.
(every southern state essentially) 



Also the US is VERY differant with regards to drafting wills.  Unlike Canada and Australia those do it yourself kits do not exist.  US legal language and rules are very complex and archiac with regards to wills (it is basically old british common law).  An attorney is not required, but almost every state requires a will signed by two witnesses (who sometimes have to be in the room at the same time as your signing).  I will also tell you that if you are transsexual, it is absolutely essential that you seek an attorneys help, just so you do not run into any contenscious issues.  You should probably do this before any medical proceedures just to be on the safe side.  Even in "red" states an attorney can effectively cut your family out of the decision making process if you have a properly drafted will.  (But I still advocate not living in those states if you are TS.)  US estate law is complex and for the most part the more complex your situation is, the more likely you will need an attorney, and being TS is an inherantly complex situation. 

Also drafting wills are one of the few things lawyers tend to have "flat" rates for.  They may be complex for an average person to draft, but for an attorney it is relitively simple.  It is one of those things you can shop around for with regards to attorneys. 

[BrandiOK]

Just my luck...I live here in one of the only states so GLBT unfriendly that they amended thier constitution so GLBT can NOT be used as a basis for discrimination or be considered as a basis for "hate" crimes.   

I have friends in many "professional" fields such as doctors but I don't know a single lawyer who could help me out on this on an "I owe ya" basis. 

Meh...............................

Yeah...I'm having one of those negative days...meh.

[LostInTime]

Check around for legal assistance.  I have known those who have used a DIY kit and they fall very short.  Plus laws change and I recently experienced that one myself.  My mother has since updated her's so that my sister and I do not go through the same hassle when she passes on.

I do not have one as of yet.  Once I die I could care less what they do to the body or anything that I used to own.  Sell it, burn it, whatever.  If I ever get serious enough to co-habitate with a SO again that may change in order to protect the SO.

[BrandiOK]

  Another reason I worry about it is because my best friend had decided to update all his information and create a will so his family would be cared for even though he was young.   Two months later he was killed in a car accident and I can't help but wonder what kind of legal troubles there would have been for his family if he hadn't done that. 

  My father died when I was 13 and had no will or insurance or anything.  The years following that were a financial hell for us and, despite the fact I am basically an invisible member of the family now, I would still like them to be cared for in the event of my death.