threads w/i threads...look around u

[Bellaon7]

the last thing i would ever do is to stop or impeed some one elses forward momentem. i will never tell some one ya, things r looking good now but just u wait...that's not true for many, but when i look around i'm somewhat discouraged by the lack of long term ts/tg's here. do they not exist, or is it something else?

[DawnL]

As people transition, they change their description.  Often they start as transgender.  Some come to realize they are transsexual and if they transition fully, they then consider themselves men or women with a transsexual history.  That describes me at this point, a woman, and since I rarely discuss my history, that is it.  I transitioned five years ago so I would consider that long term.  Very often after transition, sites like this are no longer relevant in people's lives so they stop coming.  I didn't post at all from 2006 to recently when I hit a rough patch in my life that was a direct consequence of my transition.  There are plenty of us out there, we may not be posting here, that is all.

[Hannah]

i will never tell some one ya, things r looking good now but just u wait

If there is something aweful in store, I'd be glad to hear about it from someone who has been there already. What is your definition of long term? We have our oracles here, each of us has our own favorites I'd imagine. I have never found the people here lacking in the slightest and any questions or issues I personally have ever wanted to discuss were engaged in intelligently and mostly nonjudgmentally.

[Bellaon7]

no, no predictions of gloom or doom. i understand once some one makes it through srs & beyond that they're not gonna hang around support forums & i say to them go baby go!! i'm not seeking out people in missery, but i know their r people out there like me in the sense that they're past the point of no return, yet are unable as of yet to have srs. again, i'm not looking for misery, but i know i'm not the only one & just want know where they r? i don't want to end up on a rope, but is that where us long term mess ups have to end up?

[Hannah]

You are not a mess up, don't be silly. Personally I think your'e pretty cool when you haven't been drinking 

[heatherrose]

...but when i look around i'm somewhat discouraged by the lack of long term ts/tg's here. do they not exist, or is it something else?

I really am having a difficult time understanding were you are coming from
because using a minimum of 500 posts as a starting point, I just counted 116
TG/TS members, posting an average of 1 every two days up to 16 a day. As
you can see there is no shortage of involved membership. What is it that you
are trying to say? Is there some way that we can help you? Maybe you feel
we have fallen down on the job somehow. What can we do for you?

Operators are standing by.   

[Bellaon7]

no,no, i don't feel ignored or let down, or see any kind of lack support here at all for anyone, quite the contrary! i just don't see many long term transitioning people, which is not meant to be a critcizem in any way. i'm just simply curious. i actually would hope it's more because they've made it through srs & r well adjusted!

[ceili]

no,no, i don't feel ignored or let down, or see any kind of lack support here at all for anyone, quite the contrary! i just don't see many long term transitioning people, which is not meant to be a critcizem in any way. i'm just simply curious. i actually would hope it's more because they've made it through srs & r well adjusted!

What is your idea of long-term? I'm into it a little over two years, but my transition is different than most. I'm "done" with everything and happy with my life but I am sticking around because I have always felt (despite my sometimes very bitchy exterior) a desire to help people. I am very active publicly and politically on transgender issues. Most people in my life know I am trans because they've gone through at least part of the process with me. I have young children who have two Mom's. People think we're simply lesbians but I know full well that I will always be considered and known at the very least to be a member of the LGB population, so why not just admit that I'm part of the T as well? I was in a closet most of my life and happily came flying out two years ago. Why go back now?

[Northern Jane]

I "transitioned" 35 years ago and consider myself just a woman, one who was afflicted with transsexualism and was cured. My everyday life has nothing to do with TS/TG or trans-anything and if it wasn't for the anonymity of the Internet, I wouldn't be here.

To be "out" on the forums requires a certain amount of strength and self-assurance to hang on to one's sense of self in the face of all the questioning and criticisms that go on so it is little wonder that most leave.

[heatherrose]

OK, now I assume by "longterm" you mean, someone who has completed
their transition and are now post operative. If I am correct in that assumption,
I can offer a few possible answers. Some post-op individuals, feel now that they
are "complete" women they are content with melding into societies woodwork
and desire no longer to be associated with the "Transgender Community". Then
there are some, who hung around for a while after their surgery but become
bored, similar to a high school junior sitting in class with fourth graders. The
question as to whether to "go stealth" or not, is one that has been asked for
a very long time, has caused much flamage and has bruised many an ego.

[ceili]

OK, now I assume by "longterm" you mean, someone who has completed
their transition and are now post operative. If I am correct in that assumption,
I can offer a few possible answers. Some post-op individuals, feel now that they
are "complete" women they are content with melding into societies woodwork
and desire no longer to be associated with the "Transgender Community". Then
there are some, who hung around for a while after their surgery but become
bored, similar to a high school junior sitting in class with fourth graders. The
question as to whether to "go stealth" or not, is one that has been asked for
a very long time, has caused much flamage and has bruised many an ego.

Regarding flamage and bruised ego: I don't understand why it ever comes to that. Everyone's journey is their own. I choose to be out, someone else chooses to go "stealth." Tomato, to-mah-to.... People need to stop trying to control each other.

[heatherrose]

Everyone's journey is their own.

Unless it doesn't conform to someone else's
idea of how it should be done or your
opinion grates upon somebody's nerves

[Janet_Girl]

I for one am glad that our 'completed' sister are here to pass on their words of wisdom as to life after transition.

I am sure that we all have thoughts of what life 'after' will be like.  Even our 'completed' sisters can pass on their thoughts on 'passing', 'tucking' and other things that we do to finish our own journeys.

As for now I am a Transwoman.  After Orchie, who knows.  After SRS, I am unsure.  But even I look up to my 'completed' sisters for guidance.


Janet

[ceili]

Unless it doesn't conform to someone else's
idea of how it should be done or your
opinion grates upon somebody's nerves

In that case, it's their problem, not mine. I offer my own insight and experience, gleaned from my own journey. If someone doesn't like what I have to say then they are free to disagree. It's not my job to force someone to drink from my well and I'm not going to get upset if they don't.

[Bellaon7]

I didn't transition to "trans", and certainly not "transgender".  I underwent corrective HRT and surgery (SRS) several years ago as well, and today I'm simply a woman.

Aside from this site, I don't participate in anything "trans".  I come here to share my experiences as a post-op female.  The Post-Operative Life and Sex Reassignment Surgery forums are where the majority of my posts are though sometimes I may post a thing or two under a different board of the site.  So, yes we're here somewhere, you just won't find us talking about "tucking", "passing", "trans activism" (although some do) and so forth.

ty, hoping that's the case for many others!

[FairyGirl]

for me it's a journey that's not yet over- I came here in the beginning because I was just starting HRT and wanted to get some information about it and this seemed like a good place. I found some nice and interesting and intelligent people here so I stuck around, even as I feel I am moving forward at a pace that is right for me and according to my predetermined plan. By the time I have my surgery next year I will be 1 year 10 months in transition start to finish.. "finish" being the operative word here because being trans to me is definitely a temporary condition, not a permanent way of life. As Matilda mentioned, some of the things that we find more important now will not be so much later once transition is finished, so who knows.

[Hannah]

I found some nice and interesting and intelligent people here

Haha, it is a pretty colorful group, isn't it?

[sd]

People on the internet come and go.

The lose bookmarks, interest, life changes around them, you never know. On some of my forums people come and go, some return later. This being a support forum, it's even more likely.

Some people sometimes need a break from places like this. Sometimes it can become depressing at times reading about so many peoples problems. But also, people move on.

[FairyGirl]

People on the internet come and go.

The lose bookmarks, interest, life changes around them, you never know. On some of my forums people come and go, some return later. This being a support forum, it's even more likely.

Some people sometimes need a break from places like this. Sometimes it can become depressing at times reading about so many peoples problems. But also, people move on.

this is very true, and I've seen it on my art forum as well. Usually a forum like this is centered around a common theme, such as interest in art or dolls or politics, whatever. Here we have quite an eclectic group of people whose main common focus is a (hopefully) temporary medical condition that has serious stigmas attached. It's interesting that you can notice certain other common traits that stand out in such groups, such as the no BS pragmatism I see demonstrated a lot here. Then again I'm used to hanging around with a bunch of tempermental artists so maybe everyone else is like that, what do I know. :/

[Ms.Behavin]

Hum...lets see...I've been here just about 3 years. I've seen people come and go.  Some once they are complete feel they are done with susans.   Thats fine as we're all different and we all deal with the TG/TS issues as best we can.

Me, I'll post when I can thought not that often.  It's not an easy road no matter how easy it is.  So I'm staying just to gossip... er.... that is share stories and insights with the brothers and sisters here.

Beni