Losing my faith in human nature

[Sophie]

Okay, I hate to say this and excuse the moderate language, but all the people in my school are utter jerks.
So, in Sociology today we were talking about "moral panics" and how the media makes things look worse that they are. Now, we got past homosexuals all right, but then my 20 or so classmates and the teacher started talking about transsexuals. Our teacher's conversations tend to wander somewhat, so of course we found ourselves on the subjects of surgery, whether it was legal to go into certain bathrooms etc... Well, there I was thinking I was in a room of open minded, well informed people... but no. Apparently not.
"So if a guy hasn't had his penis cut off he can't go into women's toilets then?"
According to my teacher, no. That's not actually true, but I'm shy anyways, so correcting him wasn't something I felt like doing.
On the subject of surgery, "So they can make a vagina from a penis then? Oh that's so unnatural." "Yeah, definitely not normal." "Why would anyone do that?" "I dunno, it's so weird..."
...And it was at about that point that I lost the will to live.
That was definitely the consensus of opinion in the class, so I'm geussing it's about the same in the rest of the school.
This has made me think, if someone insults gays there'll be a parade soon after, but if you insult transsexuals... no one really pays attention. No one cares.
It's almost like we're not a part of society at all. We're just those people, sort of out there, on the side, we're not to do with anyone.
What is it with people to make them think and act that way? We are in society, we do all sorts of jobs, so why doesn't anybody seem to pay attention? It's just sort of presumed that as long as we stay away from 'everyone' (especially 'everyone's' children), then we can be ignored.
I mean, do they think we all live in some sort of commune way out in Siberia making cheap porn films all day or something?
No, they just don't think at all.

[Melissa]

Well, the thing is that many people may actually be ambivalent towards the subject, but because of a few bigots who were vocal, they may have just decided to go along with the crowd.  I mean did you voice your opinion, or did you go along with the crowd?  Right, that's what I thought.  I mean, not only are you somebody who actually has an opinion about it, but one that opposes the final one, yet you failed to speak up.  Why would somebody who knows very little about the subject speak out?  The truth is that most people may have just gone along with that concensus so that they wouldn't be an odd one out.  Additionally, many of these people probably don't know a transsexual personally and actually know they are TS.  I think when people see somebody they know transitioning, that can substantially alter their point of view.  So, I wouldn't lose my faith in human nature just yet.

Melissa

[Mario]

I think that it is because we are sometimes detected, and sometimes undrtected. When you see a gay guy, or a lesbian, you see just that. Because they act it. You know it.

Most people can't detect a transsexual. They won't detect one if they pass 100%. People that don't know one, or are one will never understand the need to change our bodies. Gay people are happy with their bodies. So it is just their orientation that is different from a straight person. We are harder to understand by society.
if we pass 100%, then we will use the bathroom to which we identify. How could we not? We would be thrown out of the other one that we used to use. I sure as hell know I would be

                                              Marco

[cindianna_jones]

That's how it is.  I do not pretend to understand the perceived fear that society has for us.

But know this Steven.  We are special.  We have a unique way to perceive the world. We see things that many do not.  Don't begrudge them. 

Shoot, it takes many of us most of our lives to figure it out.  How can we expect them to do it?

Cindi

[Terra]

Steven I can totally understand your frustration in human nature, anyone who has spent any significant time around people can tell you that sometimes the bad seems to far outweigh the good in society. But remember that we as a whole tend to remember far better the negative then we ever do the positive. Yes your class might have had a few vocal fools, but was all the class speaking up? Simple silence does not always mean they agree, even if a few might have. So far im my personal experience I have had only a few bad cases of people being absolute jerks over me being trans. Even with me working at a nursing home, my boss is doing everything she can to help make my transition on the job as smooth as possible, and even a few of the residents have started to dote on me.

My point is that in my experience, for every bad apple you find in society, you can find at least two good ones, even if they don't stand out in your mind as much. Keep faith, and look twice as hard for those good, sweet apples. 

[angelsgirl]

I'm sorry to hear of your experience.  I had a similar one recently at college.  I was lifting in the weight room and there were these two people I had never met, but they engaged me in friendly conversation. We were talking about how much McDonald's we'd been eating since we got back to school and how unhealthy it was. Pretty harmless right?  Well the girl said "McDonald's is full of trans fat. Did you that New York State is looking into outlawing trans fat?" and the guy said "What? They should outlaw transexuals before they outlaw trans fat!"  I was a bit shocked. I mean what, did a transexual run over his dog or something?  So I chimed in with "Hey! I like transexuals!"  He just kind of looked at me, puzzled and said "Um, well, okay."  And that was the end of it. When people don't understand something, they don't go out of their way to try to understand it.  They would just rather put their ignorance on parade and hope that others will join so that they don't have to feel bad. 

I think it would've been really interesting if you had taken it upon yourself to educate the class.  There would've been some priceless expressions, I'm sure. There's nothing like being responsible for a sea of dumbfounded faces!  >

[brina]

Hmmm I should prolly keep my mouth shut here but being as I am opinionated I must add my 2 cents worth even at the expense of drawing a nuclear attack lol.

1) I have 2 parts comprising me the physical (package if you will) and the meta-physical ie emotional/mental

2) Obvious conflict between the physical and meta parts.

3) I feel defined by the meta-physical self rather then the physical

Oh wow I am transexual, hmm what to do about it. Oh wow I can actually change my body somewhat to make it more agreeable with how I feel internally YAAAAAAAAA.
OK now the biggie. Hmmm I'm not genetically totally female so where does that leave me hmmm, well I can pretend to myself that I am totally female OR I can accept that I am a transexual female. I choose the second as I have had enough pretending in my life time thank you very much. ( Running for the Fallout Shelter) Stealth what Bull SH*T. If people don't know that our problem is nothing more then medical and that it can be solved with hormones and surgory, how will society ever get past being ignorant about who and what we are. I don't hide my Tism and I use to say that I didn't advetise it, but that isn't exactly true. When I returned to work earlier this year I was getting ''HE'd'' alot on the job by other guys refering to me. I took to wearing T-Shirts indicatiing that I'm a Pround Transexual and some others like' If it has Wheels or TESTICLES its Gonna Give You Trouble' well guess what the HE's have turned now much more to SHE's. I never sat down with the crew and did any type of education about what I am, so assume that they (most surprised) actually did some research on thier own. The guys realize that I can do my work all on my own without help from them althouogh at times it is a challenge as I have lost strength. There is another woman on the crew and at times I feel more flack from her then the guys, I think it has to do with the fact that she is no longer the center of attention myself, but must now share it if even only a little. Hiding our transition and the fact that we are hybrid woman / men only in the end will prove to be a disservice to us.
(safely hunkered down now waiting for the anticipated storm to arrive)

Byee,
  Brina

[angelsgirl]

safely hunkered down now waiting for the anticipated storm to arrive

Yeah, not to burst your bubble, but that's not likely to happen here! If I couldn't get pummeled by the SO's with my "Reasons my T-Girl Rocks" thread, you're not likely catch too much flack for your proud outburst, either!  Good for you, though! You should be proud of yourself, you've dealt with more crap than the average woman and you're still coming out on top!