Quote from: Laura91 on October 21, 2009, 11:22:32 PM
BINGO!!!
I wear tops and jeans 99.9% of the time. I have three long skirts that actually have dust on them from under use.
Are they covered in killer dust bunnies?
Sorry, asfsd4214 for sidetracking. I have been following this thread and there is some good advice going on here and a lot of emotion wrapped up in your trying to find an answer. I wish I could offer some kind of insight, but being at least as new as you are, I haven't got answers. I do know that there are a number of Aussies here who have been undergoing transition for far longer than I have and I would hope they could chime in to lend their experience with the 'system'. Maybe there is a way through the quagmire of medical professionals to find someone who will be willing to really listen to what you have to say. I'm sure that you will always get the "have you thought about...?" questions, because you need to remember that they don't know anything about you yet and they need to learn something, though they also need to listen to what you are saying.
I personally have not heard of anyone, in my short time here, being required to go through the RLE before HRT - that to me is stupid. I know most (from my limited experience) of the girls I have come to know here have started RLE after starting HRT and the two run concurrently. I think it would be impossible to live full time in the role of your target gender, while being forced to live in the opposite role physically.
I don't want this to come across as insensitive, I understand your feelings on the matter, but perhaps if for your next session if you show up dressed as the woman you are on the inside to show that you are at least willing to meet them part way or to show by example what your reasoning is for not wanting to go public (looking like this). I can fully relate to the dysphoric feeling that dressing the guy up as a girl does not make you feel like a girl. I still look in the mirror, no matter how dressed I am, and see the guy staring back at me. I kind of compensate by not looking at the face or the whole package, but instead the parts that are more or less passable and try to overlook the fact that underneath is still 'him'. It may be a little easier for me to look past the obvious, because I have been dressing the part since I was 8 or 9, but only recently have gone outside. My first time out was to a TG conference, so I was around 800+ other TG people who were like variations of me.
Of course you must do what you feel is the right thing for yourself. My path cannot be your path also, we must each find our own ways to (whatever our individual goals are). I do hope you are able to quickly find a solution and begin your transition while you still have your health. You deserve the chance to find happiness and comfort within your own body. I wish you well.
Deanna
