In relation to my previous question and a step further to hope...

[ConfusedMichelle]

A lot of you said you knew when you were 3 or 4 years old, and even called yourself a boy. I was always very tomboyish and would love wearing my brother's clothes and stuff but I never actually thought "I am a boy." I believe it was because I was in a such a conservative environment. Then about 3 years ago, I started knowing that I was a guy, but I didn't understand. I found out what a transexual was and I thought "Wow, that relates to me." I know for a fact now that I am indeed a transexual...a guy. My question is, is there a way that I am wrong? Most of you guys knew at such the young age of 3. I knew I was tomboyish and wanted to be boylike, but I didnt know I was a guy. You guys know what I'm askin, right? It's so hard to explain.


As for the step further to hope...I asked my mom this morning hypothetically, if my older brother (her little baby) was gay, what would she do? She said "I would love all my children no matter what and accept them." I'm not sure she completely means this though. I know it would take some time, which is perfectly fine with me. But I wonder...she could deal with my brother being gay, but could she handle her little girl actually being a boy? I really think she wouldn't believe me or think I am just stupid...So I have confidence that if my brother were gay, they would accept him....buuuuut...I wonder what it would be like for me? It gives me so much hope, yet scares me even more...

Thanks guys

[Nero]

Hello and welcome Brady.
Yes, I knew as a toddler I was a boy. It's not that it was a conscious thought, "I am a boy."
Rather that I simply did not know that I wasn't. I was just too young to know that I was a "girl".
I just believed I was like my father and assumed I would grow up to be like him (a man).
I wore boy's clothes (actually it always had to be a miniature version of what my father was wearing), however, I was a nerdy kid who hated sports, so was not your classic tomboy.
I never called myself a boy, had I dared say anything like that, I'm pretty certain I would not be alive today.
I did insist on being called by male names, however it was always under the guise of  "I am an actor and this is the character I'm playing."
Like you said, I think it really depends on the environment you were raised in.
Children raised in a more accepting and safe environment would have more freedom to express themselves than others would have.
Therefore, I really wouldn't put much stock into your behaviour as a child.
Could you be wrong about this?
Yes, you could.
Look inside yourself, you will only find the answers in your heart.

Pleased to meet you, Brady.
Nero

[cindianna_jones]

Brady,

Some of us know with our first sentient thoughts.  Some of us try to be the opposite sex for years in various ways until we know.  It is different for every person.

Will your mother handle it?  It's the same answer.  I've talked to a mother that is helping her child with RLT.  And then we see people here in their middle age years trying to find acceptance from there parents.  No matter what happens with your mom, tell her that you love her.   If you have counseling, it's best to start there with learning how to deal with this.

Cindi

[Mario]

Brady,
     For me it was just something I felt when I was 6. I felt like a boy, but knew I was not since I had 2 brothers. I was ther biggest tomboy one could be. My parents had no problem with that. I was 17 before I knew what a transssexual was. I knew that was what I was. I tried to talk to my mom, but she wanted nothing to do with it. I left home, and changed my name. She never did accept it, we fought over it, but she never stopped loving me. She has been dead for almost 4 years now, and it was not until after her death that I could go forward and transition all the way. Don't let your parents hold you back.

                                                 Marco

[Melissa]

I didn't know consciously that I was a girl until I was a teen (around 12 or 13).  I actually didn't know boys and girls were physically different until I was around 7 or 8.  After that, I knew I wanted to be one, but figured that wasn't possible.  I honestly never really thought about gender much until then.  It wasn't until last year that I even knew what a transsexual was or that I was one.  That's when I began transition.

As far as parents accepting somebody who is gay and a TS...well they are completely different.  A person may respond positively to one, but not the other.  The reason is, because it challenges their concept of gender and the appearance of their child completely changes as well as the name and pronouns.  None of those happen with just being gay.

Melissa

[mikke]

A funny story told in my family is when I was quite young (maybe 5 or so) my sister and I were taking a bath  together (saving water) and she asked what the difference between boys and girls are. I told her (being the ever knowledgeable elder sibling) that they're the same, only boys have a little extra toe down *there.*



However, I really didn't identify as anything as a kid. I didn't do many gender-specific activities, I really prefered just to read books and the like. My mom liked to sew so for special occasions (xmas, easter, etc) we'd get new dresses. I liked to dress up. For halloween my sister and I would always have some sort of similar theme, and I tended to be the guy because my sister was repulsed by the idea and I really didn't care. She was pocohantas and I was "that indian dude" she was sleeping beauty and I was the prince. Etc.
In my earlier teenage years I went though the phases of wearing heavy eyeliner, tight clothes, etc but it never felt quite right. But I didn't fully identify as male until recently.

sorry about the novel.

Anyway, for parents...my parents have hinted that they would be accepting if I were gay (as I suspect they suspect I am) but usually when they claim "full acceptance of whoever you are" they usually don't even consider transsexualism. So it's open ended there; you never really know how they'll take it.