what is love

[ifonlyican14]

what is love ?
Is it situation that makes us in love ?
Is it impression ?
Is it habit ?
Is it sacrifice for the partner ?

[V M]

Love is an emotion you feel for others and hopefully they reciprocate back to you

[Janet_Girl]

I will give it a go.

what is love ?

A emotional connection to another person which may or may not be reciprocated.

Is it situation that makes us in love ?

A situation in which one finds one self may contribute to the feeling of love.

Is it impression ?

Most definitely.  Also call a chemical attraction.

Is it habit ?

It is a hard habit to break.

Is it sacrifice for the partner ?

It is sacrifice for both partners, that is how love grows.

Love is the most powerful emotion there is, but hatred can kill it slowly.  Love can overcome hate, but only if there is only a glimmer of hope within hate.


I am a hopeful romantic,
Janet

[Miniar]

Baby don't hurt me.
Don't hurt me.
No more.

I had to! I'm surprised no one did before me!

Anyway, here's the thing..

Love, as an emotion, is something we "think" we know.
We idealize it and put it into poetry, but we don't "grok" it.

As an emotion, love is when you put someone else's well-being above your own.
It's not wanting to make someone else happy in and of itself, but to want their happiness even if that means your own misery. Love is being able to walk away.
But we confuse every infatuation with love.

[Robin.]

It is a slight increase in heart rate associated with positiveness.


No, really I think it is more than that....

It is the emotional feeling we get when we feel a connection with someone that we cherish... I dunno, it can't really be explained...maybe it is just a "feeling"... a reaction of the body... but spiritually it is more than that... And spirituality is perhaps what you make it....

[lizbeth]

Baby don't hurt me.
Don't hurt me.
No more.

came here to say this...   

[EveMarie]

I believe "Love" is what you make it, and there are so many facets.
Love of mother, father, family
Love of a partner, wife or girlfriend.
Love of life, as a passion to ones heart
Love of self, the ability to know ones self and be happy.
Love of a job even, (if you're so lucky)

The term is used so liberally, but at the same time has meaning, when applied from the heart.

Evie

p.s. I'm also somewhat a romantic 

[inoutallabout]

Most definitely.  Also call a chemical attraction.

Pardon my ignorance, however, I was under the impression that not all love was chemically related.

[aubrey]

That's like asking what is wind, or light? It's an energy, a process, a nonlinear series of movements. You can't see it but you can see the effect it has on everything around it. You can try to explain it logically but ultimately words fail because it's not logical. Talking about love is like dancing about architecture.

[tekla]

I was under the impression that not all love was chemically related

Well, its more correctly electro-chemical in nature.

[EveMarie]

Seems we're splitting into two different directions here, the scientific, analytical breakdown of the meaning of love, and then the metaphysical, emotional feelings of what love is.

The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed. - Carl Jung

this could be applied to love as well

Curious to read, Evie

[Unconditional Acceptance]

I believe "Love" is what you make it, and there are so many facets.
Love of mother, father, family
Love of a partner, wife or girlfriend.
Love of life, as a passion to ones heart
Love of self, the ability to know ones self and be happy.
Love of a job even, (if you're so lucky)

The term is used so liberally, but at the same time has meaning, when applied from the heart.

Evie

p.s. I'm also somewhat a romantic 

That's like asking what is wind, or light? It's an energy, a process, a nonlinear series of movements. You can't see it but you can see the effect it has on everything around it. You can try to explain it logically but ultimately words fail because it's not logical. Talking about love is like dancing about architecture.

I quite agree with all of the above

Also, I believe that love is the all-encompassing emotion because it so easily engenders every other emotion that we as humans are capable of experiencing.

[Miniar]

I think that by "romanticizing" love, making into something grandiose and poetic, we make it into something we will never be able to live up to.
We create an unobtainable ideal that prevents us from recognizing the love that we have, that we experience, that we're given.

Love isn't incomprehensible, when you relax and stop thinking of it as if it were, and instead just allow yourself to experience it as it is.

[Miniar]

Do not quote me and then edit my words out of context. It's rude.

[spacial]

I was under the impression that not all love was chemically related

Well, its more correctly electro-chemical in nature.

Love is, of course, a subjective issue. Science can't deal with subjective issues and for a long time, credable scientists didn't try.

In recent years, many have sought to do so but their work demonstrated that they are really quacks posing a scientists.

The issue of love is a good case in point.

There are, undoubtedly, many electro/chemical/biological features associated with love. Some scientists have tried to suggest that these cause love and the feelings we experience are an illusion created by these features.

However, this argument is flawed, to the point of derision for a number of reason.

1. There is no consistancy between different humans in exhibiting these features. Either in the nature of the features or their intensity.

2. These features can be exibited by people not experiencing love. QED.

3. Most emotions result in electro/chemical/biological changes, but the emotions come first. There is a group of illnesses which are associated with emotional state. Most gastrointestinal disorders for example.

(The nature of disease is cause and predisposition, except in the case of this group of diseases, where their needs to be cause, predisposition and emotion).

Stomach ulcers are associated with anger, especially frustrated anger.

Using the reasoning of those who argue that love is electro/chemical/biological, the stomach ulcer causes anger.

Yet numerous studies have concluded that those prone to frustrated anger frequently develop stomach ulcers where these didn't exist. So, the anger comes first.

This is clear indication that emotion can and does cause electro/chemical/biological changes to occur.

[Julie Wilson]

Dr. Drew Pinsky has said that "love" or attraction is when the sickest part of one person becomes attracted to the sickest part of another person.

I know that I was (in the past) attracted to people who were bad for me.  I was attracted to bad people who were like my bad parents.  I suspect that the 'familiar' is an attraction.  My abusive father led me to become attracted to abusive men, however... it wasn't that simple.  It is more complicated.  My father was not "all-bad", he had some good qualities.  It is a package deal.

Before I met my abusive ex partner who was an un-medicated bipolar, textbook narcissist, I had stopped believing in love.  I had grown very critical of the whole concept of love.  Especially after seeing my miserable parents and their dysfunctional relationship.

My ex was someone who was also transitioning.  She was ahead of me.  At the time she had been living full-time for a year and I was still afraid to go full-time.  I thought I needed her.  She was like my father, always right and quick to anger.  Those were qualities I "admired".  And I began seeking her acceptance just as I had sought the acceptance of my father.  But when you seek someone's acceptance they only take you for granted.  They devalue you and come to despise you.  I loved her and I thought that my continued suffering and sacrifice would cause her to realize my love for her was true.  I thought she would finally "accept" me and return my efforts instead of the lies and the abuse.

But seeking her acceptance only sealed my fate, the destruction of the relationship.  Eventually her verbal abuse and lies were not enough and she had to cheat on me with others in my presence.  Then she accused me of being a monster.  She falsely accused me of all the negative attributes that were related to herself.  The abuser accused the victim of being the abuser.

So what did I learn from all this?

Love is something we each carry inside of ourselves.  In a perfect world we would share our love with everyone.  In this imperfect world it can be dangerous to love others because when you love someone else, you allow yourself to become vulnerable.

I loved doing things for Angela.  I loved seeing her happy.  I loved knowing she was safe and healthy.  Her joy became my joy.  Her happiness became my happiness.  But I was needy and co-dependant just as she was needy when I met her.

The greatest love of all was when I started loving myself.  When I allowed myself to go forward, past all my fears, through transition.  Because in order for love to be successful, you have to love yourself first.  I had to stop giving everything to Angela.  I had to start doing things for myself.  I had to begin looking to myself as the person who was going to make a place for myself in the world.  Whereas before, I was looking for someone else to save me or help me or show me the way.

I don't know if I will ever love anyone else again but I love myself and I have a pretty amazing life now.  And my attractions have changed.  I can no longer put up with abusive people, selfish, narcissistic people, liars, users, cheaters.  Because I am in a better place.  I am a better person.

Love yourself first.  That is my message to you all.

What is love?

Love is the opposite of harm.

Love is the opposite of hate.

But when you add other aspects into a relationship, like sexual attraction or dependance... then it may seem like "love" becomes complicated, but really, you can always separate out the love from the other aspects.   Some however, become confused and start thinking that sexual attraction is love, etc. etc.

[OnyaKonyaLonya]

what is love ?
Is it situation that makes us in love ?
Is it impression ?
Is it habit ?
Is it sacrifice for the partner ?

I dont know i never love someone

[LordKAT]

Absence of malice?

[accord03]

Love can't be described or explained to the world cause everyone is different.

My belief in LOVE:
Love occurs when you meet the right person for YOU. They say "Nobody is perfect" which I think it's a complete lie. The person that you love is perfect to you. They reach and meet every standard and expectation you want in a human. I can say perfection does exist in humans cause everyone has different expectation, requirement and standard. For example, apperance. Everyone find different people attractive and they might not be "Pretty, gorgeous etc" in others eyes but they are to you. That's how you meet love cause they reach your heart and soul like nobody else can. Love is also self-less and pure to me. Love is a very strong emotion which breaks into other emotions such as sadness, anger, jealousy. So, love is pretty much the God of emotions. Hate is like the devil (devil - is the bad conscious), always telling you to do bad stuf and love is like God (angel - who tells you to do the right thing) but the devil (bad conscious) can be thrown out of your head but where as love, it's difficult and hard cause people wanna do the right thing.

That's my thought anyways. You can't say who's right or wrong when defining love.

[Julie Marie]

Love has different meanings for different people.  I remember being in high school and I was in the car with my mom and some of my siblings.  My sister (who was probably a freshman or sophomore in HS at the time) said something very mean to my mom.  My mom told her she needed to apologize.  My sister replied, "Love means never having to say you're sorry" in a rather bratty way.

You learn a lot about people when you see how they define love.