How do you deal when the dysphoria's really bad?

[Hurtfulsplash]

playing with the hair on my legs and stomach

LOL I do that too

[jimmymot]

I masturbate. lol. I deal with my pain too often that way. I think I was a legitimate addict as a teen.

Music is good too.
Or dressing up as a guy and photographing myself (did that today). 

alcohol and pot, of course. but not recommended. heh

[cynthialee]

Already answered but I would add...If the dysphoria is mild run of the mill I touch my new breasts and feel very comforted.

[jimmymot]

Already answered but I would add...If the dysphoria is mild run of the mill I touch my new breasts and feel very comforted.

how beautiful.

i like your signature.

[cynthialee]

My my well thank you Jimmy. 

[jimmymot]

My my well thank you Jimmy. 

haha. no problem. i totally dig trans-women. it take a lot of ->-bleeped-<-ing guts. so kudos to you. 

[GothTranzboi]

I go out for long walks. Zone out on the computer or on videogames, or I work out and hit stuff, untill I'm so worn out that I fall into a deep sleep.

[jimmymot]

I go out for long walks. Zone out on the computer or on videogames, or I work out and hit stuff, untill I'm so worn out that I fall into a deep sleep.

Yah I lift weights myself when I'm pissed about it. I was just doing that tonight. lol

[GothTranzboi]

At lest thats constructive. I also like coming here...because its nice to just know everyone here 'gets it'. I'm so depressed right now I can't really sleep. I haven't even changed out of my clothes...I don't want to see what's underneath right now.

[jimmymot]

At lest thats constructive. I also like coming here...because its nice to just know everyone here 'gets it'. I'm so depressed right now I can't really sleep. I haven't even changed out of my clothes...I don't want to see what's underneath right now.

Yah, I'll browse on here as well for the same reason. I couldn't sleep last night because of depression (I actually ended up going to bed at 10am till 8pm :S) and was so bummed that this board was down somehow.

And yah, I'm lucky when I can be constructive. Usually I just get really overemotional, and cry or something, and then feel worse because I fall into the trap of "be a man! men don't cry!" lol  but its nice to be getting my muscles back instead. I can lift up to 50lbs and I only weigh 105. makes me feel mannnly. 

[GothTranzboi]

And yah, I'm lucky when I can be constructive. Usually I just get really overemotional, and cry or something, and then feel worse because I fall into the trap of "be a man! men don't cry!" lol  but its nice to be getting my muscles back instead. I can lift up to 50lbs and I only weigh 105. makes me feel mannnly. 

LOL I've done the don't cry thing too. I hate crying because I feel like once I'm done, it hasbn't sloved anything, and I look gross and have a headache.  Oooo...muscle nice. Yeah prolly shouldn't be going down that one track  mind train of thought either.

[confused]

I masturbate. lol. I deal with my pain too often that way. I think I was a legitimate addict as a teen.
Music is good too.
alcohol and pot, of course. but not recommended. heh

that (i deleted a part) + constant moving ( my basic strategy) +lately , coming here + trying to um... control my mind  !:  = not working sometimes , so what i do is keep moving and/or drinking till it passes
but getting depressed is not directly related to dysphoria with me i think, what gets me in dysphoria is feeling like i'm choking but only i can breath , if that makes any sense

[jimmymot]

LOL I've done the don't cry thing too. I hate crying because I feel like once I'm done, it hasbn't sloved anything, and I look gross and have a headache.  Oooo...muscle nice. Yeah prolly shouldn't be going down that one track  mind train of thought either.

Yeah, I hate that about crying too. But sometimes letting it all out is good for you. I tend to stuff my emotions, especially anger, so i probably need to do more often.

And yeah, haha, I know the muscle thing is stereotypical too. but i cant help it. I love to lift things for my lady friends and get compliments. heh

that (i deleted a part) + constant moving ( my basic strategy) +lately , coming here + trying to um... control my mind  !:  = not working sometimes , so what i do is keep moving and/or drinking till it passes
but getting depressed is not directly related to dysphoria with me i think, what gets me in dysphoria is feeling like i'm choking but only i can breath , if that makes any sense

You can only try you know. I think there's nothing you can do but accept that there will always be low days. I tell myself a lot "this too shall pass" as a reminder that no matter how bad I feel, if I'm alive there is bound to be a better day.

I think I understand what you mean about the choking thing, anxiety-ish?
I'm more inclined to acknowledge my gender, feel sad about it, feel angry at myself for feeling sad, and then becoming cynical that I care so much at all. haha. So for me its more of a frustrated/overwhelmed feeling.

[Natalie3174]

I dont deal with it very well. I usually admit myself to the Hospital and after a couple of weeks of anti-psychotic medication and HRT I feel better. I usually only get dysphoria when I go off my HRT and anti-psychotics. Once the doctors stabilise me on my medication they send me home and Im usually better. To be honest I get really psychotic when I get dysphoria. I really only need the HRT to be healthy. But the anti-psychotic medication Im on helps me sleep as it has a sedative effect. I will eventually come off the anti-psychotics. But HRT is for life.

[GothTranzboi]

I'm hoping HRT will help with the dysphoria. On a side note...I'm a sith for life! Xanatos is my fave followed by Darth maul!

[LordKAT]

Do you guys find that depression and dysphoria seem to have same basic outward appearances? As in either will cause me to bury myself in my room and not leave it. The difference is in the reason I stay there. One is cause I just don't have the will power, the other is, too embarrassed of a body that has betrayed me way to often. The idea of anyone seeing the thing I have to wear instead of me is sometimes just too much and I hide.

I'm not sure that makes sense but anyway. Words and writing just don't work for me very well.

[GothTranzboi]

Do you guys find that depression and dysphoria seem to have same basic outward appearances?
I'm not sure that makes sense but anyway. Words and writing just don't work for me very well.

I see your point. And your words are fine. I think thats also what initaily frustrated me when coming out is that people would say I'm using transistion to slove my depression. I'm not dysphoric because I'm depressed, I'm depressed because I'm Dysphoric!

[confused]

Do you guys find that depression and dysphoria seem to have same basic outward appearances? As in either will cause me to bury myself in my room and not leave it. The difference is in the reason I stay there. One is cause I just don't have the will power, the other is, too embarrassed of a body that has betrayed me way to often. The idea of anyone seeing the thing I have to wear instead of me is sometimes just too much and I hide.

I'm not sure that makes sense but anyway. Words and writing just don't work for me very well.

i totally get the idea , although i always fight that urge to hide , plus there are whole bunch of reasons why i hide away from people and the world ,so i stopped looking for reasons i do that and just trying to find reasons not to

and btw , you are really really good with words and writing , to be honest i always wanted to ask you where do you come up with all this wisdom all the time

[BoyDani]

I see your point. And your words are fine. I think thats also what initaily frustrated me when coming out is that people would say I'm using transistion to slove my depression. I'm not dysphoric because I'm depressed, I'm depressed because I'm Dysphoric!

Agh, thank you! I've been depressed for more than half of my life because of this stuff! It doesn't help my mum seems to be in denial. I've been searching for answers to this stuff for so long and when I finally have the realization of who I am, what I was hiding from myself, I went into a really bad depression... and when I finally pulled myself out everyone refused to believe me. I can't count the number of times music has saved my from myself, I've always hated myself and I've never really had an excuse for why. I knew of transsexuals, but I automatically disowned the idea, "That couldn't happen to me," mentality rendering my reasoning opaque. It's been rough, but I can hope it will get better!

[LordKAT]

i totally get the idea , although i always fight that urge to hide , plus there are whole bunch of reasons why i hide away from people and the world ,so i stopped looking for reasons i do that and just trying to find reasons not to

and btw , you are really really good with words and writing , to be honest i always wanted to ask you where do you come up with all this wisdom all the time

I hid once for just over a year with never leaving my house. Long story. It gave me time to think and figure out what I was hiding from. I had done it before a number of times but never for that long. I found that I had more than one reason. Once I knew that I could figure out how to not feel the need to hide so strongly.

As to wisdom, I'm not wise, just old. My words/thoughts are just that and no more.

I'm not dysphoric because I'm depressed, I'm depressed because I'm Dysphoric!

This is a common theme from amongst the members here.