I could use some advice...

[justmeinoz]

I know it sounds really lame, but this depression you have will eventually pass.  A lot, probably nearly all, of the people here have been in the same boat. 
As Rhalkos said, just chill out for a while, even have a good cry, and you can have things come back into focus.  Ring a crisis line if you feel you can't talk to anyone around you. They are trained to listen, and are there waiting to help.

[lilacwoman]

I give up, I can't do this anymore. Its too much pain, I can't take it. I just want it to stop. There's just too much, school, friends, parents, love, gender. I just want it to stop... I wish I was dead.

Hi Shiro,
we've all been there...just the fact that you're in distress shows something is not right or you'd be out with all the guys chasing girls and driven along by that testo surge.
You really need some input from a professional who has the brains to tell you that the testo surge is independent of your real nature and that having an erection does not mean you are 100% male.
Ask to see a therapist.

[Shiro M.]

I met with a gender therapist today, and I'm going to see her again in a week. We talked alot about things going on and about crossdressing I could do, and about HRT. The plan is foe me to start on anti androgens and to continue seeing her. I'm not really sure how long its going to take to get on estrogen, and I'm kinda anxious about that...