I was fortunate to book a one day photo shoot. As a sort of last minute favor, I agreed to cover the event.
The location was nearly 300 miles from home, so I booked a motel room in the nearby small town.
The shoot was hot, windy, dusty and lasted all day. I was throughly trashed by days end!
The motel was of a major chain, so the room was reasonably nice, on the 2nd floor, there were very few cars in the lot.
After a shower I ventured into town seeking a late dinner, of course Dennys is always there. After a light meal and a book I returned to my room and fell asleep with the TV on.
Check-out was at 11 am, so I had 3 hours remaining. I passed on the free breakfast and took care of those essentials like tucking (much easier now), shaving where I need to, attaching my forms, doing my brow lift, ahh putting on my lingerie...
I bought an adjustable complexion creme, the one that Hale Berrie uses. She was right, you can dial in your particular skin tone. The coverage is wonderful. Maybeline makes that 2-part kit that lengthens your eye lashes as long as false ones do! I do my eyes with smoky tones, then my favorite lip liner and color.
Finally, my wonderfully long and wavy brunette hairpiece. This is always my favorite moment, leaning forward, pulling it on, then flipping my head back, all that hair falls on my shoulders and frames my face, I comb it back and secure the piece with several pins, now the windy weather can't blow it off.
There are forum topics about looking in the mirror, what makes us feel feminine, etc... Well all of those elements come together for me as I pull on my jeans amd belt, then a black ladies tee shirt. The shirt is long enough to tuck in. I bought a pair of casual leather shoes with a moderate heel.
So thats that! Linsey is ready to face the world again if only but for a while.
I needed to make several trips to my van, all the camera gear, laptop and my baggage, there's always that first step from the relative safety of my room and into the real world. I take a long breath, relax, pick up my gear and walk out the door. No one around, but that will change later on. I take the stairs into the parking lot, across that and unlocked my van. There were a few cars so I imagine that someone was watching me from one of the rooms but it didn't matter to me at all.
Back up to the room for the rest of my things, the room service ladies were already down the corridor, cleaning the rooms. I sat and watched a few minutes of TV, sipping the coffee from this morning. I left the room, walking past one of the cleaning ladies. I started up and drove out into the town, I needed gas before getting on the highway.
I realized that I was no longer thinking of myself as cross-dressed, but as a middle aged Latina woman, going about her business. I wasn't constantly adjusting and fussing over myself. I forgot about those bouncy forms and tapes and having to tuck. I'm just me, driving up to the gas pump, with several other people doing the same.
I deal with mostly cash, so I must go into the small store and pay. I grab some money and lock the van. As I walk up to the store, I can see myself full length in the large windows, I smile as I don't recognize myself.
The Mexican cashier looks straight at my rack as I carefully say "eighty on six.". He takes the money, smiles at me and nods his okay.
As I return to the van, a deep sense of well being overcomes me, and I become teary eyed as a rush of emotion sends chills down my spine. I pay no attention to the person in the car next to me as I fill my tank. I clean the windows just as always. Lastly I take a drink from the ice chest, for the road. A man, his wife and 4-5 children are in the car behind me.
He smiles at me as I walk pass, I smiled back.
I feel like I belong here.
300 miles to go.
