Yeah... I've definitely had similar experiences. Eerily similar. Sometimes the office staff forgets and uses your given name vs. chosen name, other times it can be intentional for whatever messed-up reason. If you correct them and it happens again, you'll have your answer.
I also have a male endo and he's also a fan of the top to bottom exam. Are you on 1 or 2 anti-androgens? I've done a fair amount of research on progesterone, and the downside outweighs the upside for me. I plan on having BA surgery, so breast growth isn't something important to me.
As far a erections and function go, some MTFs are able to maintain erections (with manual stimulation) and function up to the day of SRS. Definitely not the norm, but it does and can happen.