Need help supporting FTM boyfriend

[Azalie]

Hey

I've been with my boyfriend for about a year now, and I've done everything I can to try and help him through the stages he's going through. Right now he's still pre-T and very stressed about about everything.

so far I've gotten him to be able to come out to his family, got him binders and packies, found this forum for him to get to know some other FTMs and what not. But he still get's a little depressed about things...I don't know if there is anything more I can do other then comfort him.

Also, how could I brace myself for the changes to come? I know what will happen, but I'm not sure if it will affect me or not...

[xAndrewx]

Wow, it sounds like you have helped a lot already! It seems like you're researched and as long as you're keeping good communication which it sounds like you are I'm not sure there is anything else I can suggest. It's great that he has someone so supportive Depression was a common thing for me along with my ex having to put up with me changing ten times every morning trying to find an outfit I thought I passed in... but it got better for me, even though I'm still pre-T, once I talked to more guys and got more comfortable with my "self" so hopefully it will for him as well.

[rite_of_inversion]

Sounds like you're doing everything right to me...so calm down, okay?
I can't imagine someone would not be nervous and depressed about transition, because, well it's a giant change. For the better, yeah, but change is always scary.
Do y'all go out and do fun stuff?   I hope so!  It's fun times and happy things done together that help cement relationships as well as trials fought together...so make sure you do things that you both enjoy.

[Azalie]

Wow, it sounds like you have helped a lot already! It seems like you're researched and as long as you're keeping good communication which it sounds like you are I'm not sure there is anything else I can suggest. It's great that he has someone so supportive Depression was a common thing for me along with my ex having to put up with me changing ten times every morning trying to find an outfit I thought I passed in... but it got better for me, even though I'm still pre-T, once I talked to more guys and got more comfortable with my "self" so hopefully it will for him as well.

I hope so. Yeah, he does the change 10 times a day to find something he thinks he passes in...he has a big bum so he gets really paranoid about it lol I just let him know I use to have a bf with a bum bigger then mine and he was born male...usually helps him out.
He seems to be a lot happier since he got compliments about his passing on here as well as I've noticed he's gotten some hints as well from other FTMs, which I'm happy for. How come you haven't started? if you don't mind me asking...

Sounds like you're doing everything right to me...so calm down, okay?
I can't imagine someone would not be nervous and depressed about transition, because, well it's a giant change. For the better, yeah, but change is always scary.
Do y'all go out and do fun stuff?   I hope so!  It's fun times and happy things done together that help cement relationships as well as trials fought together...so make sure you do things that you both enjoy.

*nods* I do tend to just from one end of the scale to the other, one minute I can't wait for him to be on T the next I'm upset that he wont be the "she" I fell in love with.

Yes! I make sure we go do lots of fun things, but as broke as we are XD can't really do it as often as I wish. But getting him to his assessments to get on his shots is more important in my books anyway...

[xAndrewx]

Haven't been able to start due to sooo many different things. The first was my ex. Our daughter (not mine biologically) is a year old and has been in and out of my life (my ex... well she isn't so stable) but she came back again recently so all of my saved up money went to her and getting things for my daughter (she left me for her ex bf two weeks ago though) so now I can start saving again. :/ other than that it's just the case of finding a job to get insurance to cover it. Lots of people seem to think that hiring a 19 year old trans boy is a bad idea I guess. Once I do though I'm out to everyone so I can start right away

[Azalie]

Haven't been able to start due to sooo many different things. The first was my ex. Our daughter (not mine biologically) is a year old and has been in and out of my life (my ex... well she isn't so stable) but she came back again recently so all of my saved up money went to her and getting things for my daughter (she left me for her ex bf two weeks ago though) so now I can start saving again. :/ other than that it's just the case of finding a job to get insurance to cover it. Lots of people seem to think that hiring a 19 year old trans boy is a bad idea I guess. Once I do though I'm out to everyone so I can start right away

ex = needs to die in a fire
Job = less discrimination kthx <_<
good luck on saving. You can always go onto those paid email sights lol I got $150 last pay, so did Zack...Just that little extra! or you can get all your hot friends together and do a car wash XD

[Shang]

He'll still be the same person you fell in love with, just more confident and happy because he'll be in the body he needs.

And it sounds like you're doing a wonderful job!

[xAndrewx]

Thanks Azalie, I hadn't even thought of the online work, that's a great idea! Car wash is a good idea too for my starting funds

[Shang]

Thanks Azalie, I hadn't even thought of the online work, that's a great idea! Car wash is a good idea too for my starting funds

If you're creative, you can make things.  I'm going to start making blankets (fleece) and pillows and selling them to have funds for a gender therapist.