Corrupt-A-Wish

[Devlyn]

Granted, one thousand, four hundred, seventy eight times! 



I wish I had made it one thousand, three hundred, seventy eight jelly beans.

[suzifrommd]

I wish I had made it one thousand, three hundred, seventy eight jelly beans.

Granted. You may go back in time and change your wish. Just let me set the time machine. Hmm. Uh... Don't know how to tell you this, but I accidentally set it a mite too far. You're now two and a half.

I wish people would stop wishing for jelly beans.

[ZoeM]

Granted. You may go back in time and change your wish. Just let me set the time machine. Hmm. Uh... Don't know how to tell you this, but I accidentally set it a mite too far. You're now two and a half.

I wish people would stop wishing for jelly beans.

Granted.

I wish I had a jammy dodger.

[DriftingCrow]

Granted, but unfortunately a dog got into your package and ate them all. 

I wish the world would always smell like freshly ground coffee beans. 

[LocustToybox]

Granted... But it's uncleaned Kopi Luwak (google it)
I wish I hadn't eaten all the sugar that I did yesterday.

[Devlyn]

Granted... But it's uncleaned Kopi Luwak (google it)
I wish I hadn't eaten all the sugar that I did yesterday.

Granted, but you had three bags of potato chips and your blood pressure is sky high. And you're thirsty.


I wish I had a new couch.

[ZoeM]

Granted, but you had three bags of potato chips and your blood pressure is sky high. And you're thirsty.


I wish I had a new couch.

Granted. It's new... to you.

I wish nobody at Goodwill would stare at me today.

[LocustToybox]

Granted... But instead of staring at you, they poke at you and grab at you.
I wish I had a more angular face.

[suzifrommd]

Granted... But instead of staring at you, they poke at you and grab at you.
I wish I had a more angular face.

Granted:



I wish computers always did what you wanted.

[LocustToybox]

Granted:

Haha your answer made me laugh.
Granted... But it takes the computer four months to do everything (like open a browser or move the mouse.)
I wish my pet rats would live longer.

[V M]

Granted... But they have taken up residence in your hair

I wish I had a transporter device to go to the grocery store and back to do my shopping rather than having to ride my bicycle

[LocustToybox]

Granted... But you get really obese from lack of physical activity.
I wish I could eat whatever I wanted and still be muscular, thin, and healthy.

[DriftingCrow]

Granted, but the stores only carry strawberry flavored Ensure now.

I wish it wasn't raining.

[LocustToybox]

Granted... But it's 153 degrees fahrenheit and sunny. There is also no air conditioner.
I wish my grandfather wasn't such a sadistic, bigoted arse.

[DriftingCrow]

Granted, but now he's aTellitubby.

I wish I could take my dog to school with me.

[LocustToybox]

Granted... But some kid decides to throw things at your dog and aggravate it, your dog bites the kid in self defense, the kid's parents press charges, and your dog has to be put to sleep.
I wish my cat wasn't so picky about his food.

[King Malachite]

Granted.  Your cat now uses your bed as a place to go to the bathroom instead.



I wish sodas were healthy to drink.

[Catherine Sarah]

Granted. You however become sooooo healthy with your 'Hulk" type figure, the rest of the world embraces soda as a national beverage.

This leads to a massive worldwide shortage of water (used in manufacture) that eventually leads to mankind's demise on this planet.

The moral of this story is: not everything that's healthy for you, is good for you.

I wish summer was eternal

[Liminal Stranger]

Granted, but you don't have an A/C.

I wish my puppy would stop being so overprotective and paranoid, she thinks every noise is an intruder coming to steal her toys and bones.

[King Malachite]

Granted.  Your puppy runs away.


I wish I could eat a tire without any negative consequences.