Corrupt-A-Wish

[MadeleineG]

Wish granted, whatever it may have been

I wish folks were able to stay on topic

Granted. We all produce identical widgets for the rest of eternity.

I wish the threading structure were two dimensional, so that tangents didn't disrupt the flow of the main discussion. 

[Lajs]

Wish granted. The forum now operates in all 11 dimensions. Unfortunately, as you are only able to perceive four of them, you are missing out on a lot. (Though tangents are, indeed, now far less in intrusive).

I wish I had a Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster.

[SaveMeJeebus]

Wish granted. It makes your brain go mushy. You couldn't handle it. You'll never be the same again.

I wish I had more time

[LordKAT]

Wish granted, but the universe implodes so that nothing is left except time and your consciousness.

I wish no one ever felt alone.

[ComplicatedMe]

Wish granted but there is never any privacy and someone is always with you.

I wish I was the best in the world at something.

[LordKAT]

You are, no else can be you like you can.

Wish granted, but no one appreciates it so it just don't matter.

I wish for a well paid hobby.

[Lajs]

Wish granted. You take up garbage sculpting... it smells so awful that people pay you to go away.

I wish I could impress people with displays of physical prowess.

[Lajs]

Wish granted. They arrive. ...But they like it so much that they just keep coming back, in greater and greater numbers. And before you know it Earth is an alien holiday resort and humans, regarded as nothing more than the local wildlife, are photographed and gawked at by alien tourists on tacky safaris. Some of us are even shot and mounted and brought back as rugs to furnish alien homes. Not to mention the illegal pet trade that springs up...

...I wish I didn't get so carried away in corrupting wishes.

[DriftingCrow]

Wish granted, but the cows are so heavy they break the trees limbs, fall, and hurt themselves.

I wish my dog didn't shed so much.

[Lajs]

Granted - a new type of person comes along who is twice as unreasonable, making all those who seemed unreasonable before now seem much more reasonable in comparison.

I wish I had a chariot.

[SaveMeJeebus]

I can't believe I read carrot. I was going to say, 'Wish granted, you get a carrot but you have to eat the stalk.' That is corruptible, is not it no?  . If you wish for me to corrupt the chariot as well, well then... You get a chariot, but with square wheels and no horses.

I wish my laptop battery didn't die on me today ;_;

[suzifrommd]

I wish my laptop battery didn't die on me today ;_;

Granted. It's a live. You can't kill it. It's got a mind of its own. It's sending messages to everyone you know. You can't stop it!

I wish estrogen didn't make me gain weight around my middle.

[LordKAT]

granted, you now have a very big caboose.


I wish I knew how to foil corrupt wishes.  (no aluminum please.)

[ComplicatedMe]

Granted, you know how to foil them but you can't actually do it.

I wish cleaning didn't take so long.

[Jenny07]

Granted, cleaning is now a breeze and you turn to drink to fill the spare time.

I want to be a witch!

[MadeleineG]

Granted.



I wish that my banjo would stay in tune.

[LordKAT]

Granted, but it got lost in the lost luggage area of an airplane.

I wish my bank would hurry up with my replacement ATM card so I could renew my subscription to Susan's.

[MadeleineG]

Done, and when you do, you accidentally sign up for the "Plutonium Subscription" valued at $2200/year. Good for the site, hard on the bank balance.

I wish I had more time to read.

[DriftingCrow]

Wish granted, unfortunately you only have more time because a giant hurricane came through and knocked all the power out. It's nighttime and you have no flashlights or candles to read by,

I wish I could eat all day, only workout when I feel like it, and still be in perfect health and have a perfect figure.

[LordKAT]

Granted but now you  eat all day and have no time for things like friends or spending money.

LOL @Plutonium Subscription.

Now if only there was a lifetime subscription amount.

I wish for sanity. I keep asking at every store I go to and they always say they are fresh out.