Corrupt-A-Wish

[Jacquelyn]

I wish I had every single Castlevania and Mega Man game in the world.

Granted. You have every single Castlevania and Mega Man game in the world, but no system to play them on.

I wish I had a walk in closet.

[sigmafan]

Granted, but you will not have any clothing or shoes or anything in that closet at all.

I wish I was a little bit taller, I wish I was a baller, I wish I had a girl and a kid, I would call her.  I wish I had rabbit with a hat and a bat, and a '64 impala.

[Jacquelyn]

Granted, but you will not have any clothing or shoes or anything in that closet at all.

I wish I was a little bit taller, I wish I was a baller, I wish I had a girl and a kid, I would call her.  I wish I had rabbit with a hat and a bat, and a '64 impala.

Boooo. I love shoes! Hahaha

Granted: But, the tree of you live in your impala, it doesn't run, and to feed your family you have to eat your rabbit. (PS. My SO sings that all the time. Hahahahaha)


I wish I had unlimited wealth.

[sigmafan]

Boooo. I love shoes! Hahaha

Granted: But, the tree of you live in your impala, it doesn't run, and to feed your family you have to eat your rabbit. (PS. My SO sings that all the time. Hahahahaha)


I wish I had unlimited wealth.

Granted, but unfortunately it's all in Lira.

I wish I had every episode of WCW Saturday Night & Worldwide.

[A]

Granted. You discover there are more than you think. But you also discover that they did dub these in Finnish.

I wish my job did not consist of repeating the same words over and over.

[Jacquelyn]

Wish granted, however now you can never speak at work again.

I wish that I could start everything from scratch.

[A]

Granted. A loan shark comes and informs you that he is about to take away everything you own because of an old debt your old uncle died with. Now isn't this a fresh start ?

I wish I did not have a headache right now.

[Karla]

Your wish has been granted, however now for some reason you wish that you did not *not* have a headache, and if that shall come true then you revert back to your original wish in an endless cycle.

I wish I had someone to drive me anywhere and everywhere.

[V M]

You do... But they take you anywhere and everywhere they want to go and you just sit bored to death waiting for them to get done

I wish I could eat anything and everything I felt like and gain any weight

[Mr.Hyde]

Granted, but now you have to go to the bathroom just after eat and return everything 

I wish I could sleep an entire week without disturbing...

[Double_Rainbow]

Granted, you fall asleep in your bed only to have a meteor come crashing down on the very tip of your bed launching you skywards through the hole in the roof.  At the same time a new prototype aircraft is flying over and the velocity at which you are traveling causes the aircraft to get caught in your draft and disassemble.  As you slow down and begin to fall back towards earth, the heat surrounding you melds the prototype aircraft's pieces into something resembling a pod and you crash back down at such a speed, you fly through the earth and into the core of the planet.  The iron and nickel quadruple fuse to become a super hard shell around the pod you are in.  So you finally wake up after a week and freak out because you don't know where you are, but at least you have bits of pilot from the aircraft trapped in the pod to eat.

I wish my neighbors wouldn't fight so loud all the time!

[sigmafan]

Granted, but unfortunately because of a freak accident, you have lost 25% of your hearing and you're unable to hear those three little words that everybody wants to hear....I Love You.

I wish I was back in college graduating with a bachelors degree in broadcast production

[Dante]

Granted, you just got your bachelor's degree in broadcast production, but a new law is passed saying that you can only produce childrens' shows!

I wish I could read whole books in just one hour!

[sigmafan]

Hey, I can make some killer kids game shows. 

You're wish is granted, but unfortunately those books are all written by your least favorite people in the world...mainly Fred Phelps and others.

I wish I had a limitless supply of Diet Pomegranate 7-Up.

[Lee]

It now comes out of all of your water taps.  Enjoy your shower tomorrow morning 

I wish I had more masculine jewelery

[Mr.Hyde]

Granted, but now all the girls wear masculine jewelry so it's now considered femenine jewelry 

I wish I had a nice suitcase...

[sigmafan]

Granted...But inside is 2 dead skunks & 3 human heads.  Try cleaning the inside of that suitcase out.

I wish for a safe and healthy trip for me to Columbus and Chicago in February.

[Karla]

Your trip will be indeed safe and healthy since the entire time you will be in an sterile isolation chamber equipped with shock resistant cushions and no internal sharp edges!
(Have a safe enjoyable trip, sigmafan )

I wish I were able to to unlock the mysteries of the universe.

[V M]

You do unlock the mysteries of the universe... But it scares the stuff out of you and you lock it back up again

I wish I wasn't so lonely and full of anxiety and depression

[sigmafan]

You do unlock the mysteries of the universe... But it scares the stuff out of you and you lock it back up again

I wish I wasn't so lonely and full of anxiety and depression

Granted, but you're now filled with people who won't leave you the hell alone, who are full of anxiety and depressed.

I wish for a shield, just like Captain America had.