Corrupt-A-Wish

[Lee]

Granted, but he's gay.

I wish I had a glass of orange juice.

[April Dawne]

(since I still have a penis, gay might not be an end-all, just saying)

Granted, you have a glass of orange juice that's been sitting on the counter for three months.

I wish I hadn't had to stop HRT

[xxUltraModLadyxx]

granted, but the estrogen gives you a blood clot.

i wish i could overcome pure o. (purely obsessional obsessive compulsive disorder.)

[r e m]

After many long years, you finally do..but at a celebratory get-together, all your guests are mowed down in front of your eyes by a runaway snowplow. you are sent into a deep relapse.

i'm wishing that I get hired at the job I'm applying for tomorrow.

[Padma]

Granted: you are hired, but fired the same day for mowing down some people with a snowplow.

I wish my hip would stop aching.

[justmeinoz]

Granted. It is now frozen solid after you fall in a snow drift escaping a homicidal snowplow driver.

I wish it would snow here so I don't have to wait forever for a new ice rink to be built.

[Padma]

Granted: a wild Jake Gyllenhall ice-age film appears, and you die from projectile vomiting at the godawful sentimentality of it all.

I wish my raddle had arrived today, instead of some bloomin' clothes catalogue.

[Juliet]

Why did this awesome thread end?  Is it because I'm not the only one who doesn't know what you mean by raddle and therefore can't properly corrupt it?

I wish I knew what he meant by "raddle"

[Dante]

Granted. (I don't know what he meant either.  Please enlighten us, yoxi.) He misspelled "rattle", so you give him a baby rattle and he tries to kill you with it.

I wish I hadn't burnt the bottoms of my feet today. (long story...  )

[CosmicCandi]

Granted.  Your feet did not get burned, instead they melted, albeit painlessly. 

I wish I could start my hormones soon so I can start feeling like the real me.

[xxUltraModLadyxx]

granted, but they make you very hungry all the time, and you gain 50 pounds.

i wish my breasts weren't feeling so sensitive right now.

[Lee]

Granted.  Your breasts turn to lead.  The sensation no longer bothers you, but the extra weight gives you back problems.  Also, you know, nobody likes to play with lead.

I wish I hadn't watched the Doctor Who episode "Blink" right before bed. *shudder*

[fleshpull]

Granted.  Your breasts turn to lead.  The sensation no longer bothers you, but the extra weight gives you back problems.  Also, you know, nobody likes to play with lead.

I wish I hadn't watched the Doctor Who episode "Blink" right before bed. *shudder*

Granted, there is no more Dr. Who.

I wish I had a Supercharger for my Acura NSX

[Juliet]

Granted, but you get the supercharger in exchange for the Acura itself


I wish I had a normal human sleep schedule

[angiejuly]

Granted, but you get the supercharger in exchange for the Acura itself


I wish I had a normal human sleep schedule

Granted, Now you are up all night like the rest of us wishing you could sleep.

I wish I was a wasle wooooo on a backwards train.

[Padma]

Granted: now you're doomed to go ooch ooch* for all eternity.

I wish my ears were smaller

(*which of course isn't choo choo backwards, but oohc oohc looked wrong )

[justmeinoz]

Granted, they are so small you can no longer wear glasses, or sunglasses.

I was going to was that my Lab Manager would resign, but she did and we are going to be privatised as well.

I wish I had a Sprintex Supercharger for my 86 Honda City micro car.

[sigmafan]

Granted, but unfortunately, the Sprintex Supercharger was meant for the 1987 Honda City Micro Car and your car gets damaged beyond repair.

I wish I had tickets to go to Wrestlemania 27 this weekend.

[Padma]

Granted: you get ringside seats and get steam-ironed by a falling heavyweight.

I wish I'd already moved house.

[NathanW]

Granted but the house you move into is really dirty