FtM crossdresser?

[EchelonHunt]

Thank you for writing this! It is wonderful to know I am not alone 

I completely understand how you feel! I am the same way... although, it took transitioning and taking hormones for me to realize I lumped my femininity in with being female - it didn't help that the online trans community at the time equated feminine things with being female and that if you didn't fit the "male stereotype" that you weren't "trans" enough - god, writing that almost made my blood boil. I enjoy being feminine in the way that you describe, I heavily dislike being a "woman", being associated as female just because of the genitals I exhibit. Breasts, vagina, periods and the image of being a fertile woman on myself grosses me out!

I love wearing long wigs and dressing up very girly, I love wearing feminine cut tshirts (although I'd rather wear them after top surgery, I feel too "female" wearing them while still having breasts), tutus, punk skirts and stockings!! Although I miss my female voice and am currently trying to work on feminizing my voice. I wish to have a body that is devoid of both male and female secondary characteristics. The body I held before puberty changed it is the body I wish to see in the mirror once again... 

[mac1]

I really like the looks of glamorous androgyny such as David Bowie, goth dudes in skirts and eyeliner, Japanese anime guys, flamboyant FtMs pre-T, and young boys cross-dressing.  Anything that is fabulous, lovely, femme... but also male. 

Whoa, so, anyone else around these parts have something in common with me, or just think I'm confusing and want to ask personal questions?

I agree with you that it would be nice to be able to pass freely as either female or male without question. You being female it is easier for you to do that. A soft delicate person is more readily accepted as a male than a masculine appearing person is accepted as a female.

[echo_artist]

I always feel that I was just the wrong combination of feminine, so it freaked me out.
The only thing I see me still having female parts, is to have a kid. (which is kind of touchy subject for others)
When Im done, I just want it to melt off.
I know how hard it is for same sex partners to have a kid, so I wanted to take advantage of that.
Other than that.
I feel like I'm crossdressing when I wear female clothes. I feel like a male, just a very femme one, or just non-binary.
I thought I was just weird because I couldn't connect with anyone because they were mostly masculine.
It's just been hard to find people to connect to.
I also can't stan periods, they're >-bleeped-<ing expensive!!!! (sorry for the french...)

[OreSama]

I love wearing skirts, I love my long hair and everything but I've never wanted to be seen as a girl when I was dressed as one- I want to be seen as a crossdresser when I'm wearing girl's clothing.  I do consider myself to be within the binary but that's just my personal interpretation of it.  I don't fit into male gender roles or stereotypes but I do want to look masculine instead of androgynous, and to only have male sex characteristics so yeah.  Well, I still want to keep my hair but I never saw it as being particularly masculine or feminine, which is probably because a lot of influential people in my life, both male and female have had long hair.