i'm not sure what to do.

[lostmagic564]

i want to tell my mum that i wish that i was born female i think she knows beaucse when i was younger i was odd when it came to gender and was mistaken for being female but now whenever i try and talk about it her she goes on her guard and asks if im leaving the family to do some thing odd .she says she will support me whatever i chose to do with my life but i feel likes shes will go back on her word also what will i do after i told her.  i dont know the next step to go on from here i want a female body becuause i feel kind of traped in my own skin and if i try and act like myself it allways ends badly its not that i hate being male its just does not feel right and hoping someone can give me some adive on this.  can someone tell me what the next step is? oh and im new here hello everyone, erm is there an age resturen here?  sorry for my spelling.

[CaitJ]

I think the wisest course of action will be to finish school, leave home (either for a job or college or both) and then start thinking seriously about what you want to do with regards to your gender identity (i.e. transitioning).
In the meantime, try to find a counselor or therapist to talk over your issues with.

[Randi]

Hi Lostmagic, Your situation sounds very familiar so don't think you are the only one. Lots of us here have said the same thing (browse thru the older posts). Many of us have not been fortunate enough to have confronted this when we were young. When someone transitions before they completely mature  the results are striking. But there are several steps that must be followed first.
You have to be completely honest with your Mother about what you want to do-even if it is uncomfortable. You have to be evaluated by a gender therapist to rule out other things besides transexualism. If your therapist is convinced that you are transexual, you will eventually recieve a letter of recommendation for hormone therapy which allows you to be prescribed Estrogen and a substance to block production and assimilation of testosterone by your body so you will stop developing as male.
This process is not to be taken lightly and is only to be done after evaluation by a professional(s). Please take the time if you can to read the older posts-there is a wealth of information to be found there and will avoid the repeating of information over and over. I hope this helps you and Welcome to our Forums!!!

Randi

[Nicky]

I think it is a good plan to find a trans friendly therapist or counsellor. Not so much for the diagnosis side as you know what you feel and don't sound confused, more for the support they can offer. They can help you with things like coming out and telling your parents. Also if you seek hormone therapy etc then you will likey need their help for things like letters of recommendation.

I think it is great that you have come looking for help! Well done you.

Hugs!

[Sarah B]

Hi Lostmagic564

Welcome to Susan's and thank you for telling us your story.  You have indicated that you "want a female body", well many of us here on Susan's have expressed that exact same wish or some other variation of it, for me it was "I want to be a girl" or "I want to be a woman".  On Susan's there are many topics that deal with these gender issues and there is always someone who has an answer to a similar problem you may have in regards to your gender problems.

When I was young I grew up thinking something was not quite right and like you, 'I did not hate my body, but it did not feel right', there is nothing wrong with feeling like that.  The only people who can help you with this is yourself, by finding out as much as you can about 'transgendered people' and of course a 'gender therapist'.

You have not done anything wrong and neither has your mother and from what you have said, she may know something is going on by this statement, "she will support me whatever i chose to do with my life" and more than likely she will support you unconditionally, however that is not to say that there will be some tough times ahead for both of you.  Your mother will have to learn all about this as well.

I would say the next steps that you need to consider would be:

• Learn as much as you can about being transgendered
• Talk to your mum about it.
• Find a gender therapist
• Hormones

Finally the most important thing you must do what ever you decide to do is stay at school and learn as much as you can.  Because your education is one of the most important things that will help you no matter what you decide.

Look around Susan's and you will find answers to questions you may have and if you cannot find the answers then all you have to do is ask.  Remember, what ever you decide to do we will support you.

Take care and look after yourself.

Kind regards
Sarah B