CRaSH:
I don't think ever we've had anyone rack up as much negative karma and end up on the watched list as quickly as you without getting moderated or outright banned.
We've had trolls before, but you do not seem to be one of those, however. You have stated that you are attracted to pre-operative or non-operative male to female trans women and genuinely seem to be wanting to understand them as people.
You've been told that this is not a dating site but are welcome to join in the conversation.
I have read through your posts, and you really seem to be trying participate.
You do come off as abrasive (see previous statement about negative karma) but if I try to put your statements in context I can understand that you are trying to state your own point of view. Which is one of the things that Susan's is all about.
But, please, you must understand that we are very sensitive, fragile people here. Many of us are trying to understand ourselves and come to grips with a terribly debilitating condition.
We are first, and foremost, people. We are not just words on a screen. We refuse to be objectified. Too often society in general regards us as shameful, perverted wastes of flesh and souls. Often times rejected by our loved ones and closest friends at the very moment that we need support and understanding.
For many of us, the people on this list and others like it, are the only family that they have and the only place to find solace and understanding. We are a broken people looking to heal, to transform, to become what they know themselves to be.
Many of us identify with the butterfly. Because this wonderful creature spends its life as a caterpillar, inching its way along with its drab colors, knowing nothing else of the world other than the leaf just in front of it. Then without its own volition, is driven to create a chrysalis, and within that cocoon to change, transform, and become something it perhaps only dimly perceived itself to be. And then emerge as something so different, and colorful, and FREE!
And if it is prevented from this transition, it will die. Many of us have come to the edge of the abyss. To face a life that is utterly changed never to return, or die. And too many of us have chosen oblivion rather than life.
Like the caterpillar/butterfly we are born to be this way. It is not a learned thing. It is not a fun thing. We would not wish this condition on our worst enemy. And this is not in any way sexually titillating or gratifying for us. Indeed one of the very first things to be annihilated by the dangerous medications we take is the sex drive, the libido. Permanent, chemical castration is one of the first irreversible effects of our journey and we accept that lifelong sterilization. Our exterior plumbing is only useful, in many cases, only for simple urination, not ejaculation.
We really do wish open and honest exchange of ideas and support, and we are truly open to all. But, please, if at all possible in your responses and posts, be mindful of the people you are speaking to as we try to be mindful of you.
Realize that words have power, and they can cut very deeply. We respect your opinion and really do want your input because we rarely get to interact with others not like ourselves without being disrespected.
We are just people and we want to live just as people, not sex objects. We often face a life of loneliness without a life partner or deep relationship. And the only thing we may be allowed is tawdry, temporary, coupling based solely on our difference and then discarded. We are not disposable people.
Thank you CraSH for being here, and interacting with us on a level we rarely see. But hold us gently for we can break.
-Sandy
