Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I am just posting here to restart my rarely updated blog. There is nothing much new with me. I hope to get my username changed to Athena which is the name that I am changing to in real life. I have to call sevice ontario friday or so to see how the process is going for my birth certificate. Maybe on monday or tuesday I will try to call GRS Montreal to see when I might be getting the call to arrange my surgery date.

@Athena (aka: previously... White Rabbit and Julie-h)
I am so very glad to see that you have returned to get your Blog thread going again. 

GOOD NEWS: Your screen name and member name are now changed as you requested to Athena

I will be eagerly looking forward to seeing and reading your postings here on your Blog Thread
and around the various threads around the Forum.

HUGS, Danielle

Quote from: Athena on January 14, 2024, 02:43:35 PMI am just posting here to restart my rarely updated blog. There is nothing much new with me. I hope to get my username changed to Athena which is the name that I am changing to in real life. I have to call sevice ontario friday or so to see how the process is going for my birth certificate. Maybe on monday or tuesday I will try to call GRS Montreal to see when I might be getting the call to arrange my surgery date.

I renamed the blog for you

Thank you

With all the name changes, I'm going to have to keep a cheat sheet!  White Rabbit --> Julie --> Athena.  Got it!  ;D

Congrats on the official name change, Athena!

~Sara

I was listening to Jefferson airplane when I made the account then I decided that I wanted to use Julie as a name because it had special meaning to me but was convinced to not use that name and choose a different name. I had my friends daughter help me choose my name and we came up with Athena Sophia Katz. I'm still waiting on my birth certificate but it's in the works.

Well its official as of today according to the government of Ontario my name is now Athena Sophia Katz. They are sending out my name change certificate tomorrow and my new birth certificate probably in a few days.

Quote from: Athena on January 24, 2024, 12:32:03 PMWell its official as of today according to the government of Ontario my name is now Athena Sophia Katz. They are sending out my name change certificate tomorrow and my new birth certificate probably in a few days.

Awesome! Congratulations, Athena!!!

Love always -- Jess

thanks :)

So I got my birth certificate Wednesday and changed the rest of my provincial ID's now I just have to wait for those to come in before I can change my federal ID's.

Yea! I highly recommend updating name and gender as quickly as possible once that become an option. It sounds like you're well on the way to getting this taken care of. Having all of your identity paperwork matching your desired name and gender is extremely important. It's difficult to know if open doors will suddenly close. I hope the rest of the paperwork goes smoothly.

Love always -- Jess

Just got my new driver's license now I am just waiting on my OHIP card then I can worry about changing my federal id's

That's great news Athena! Getting all of those documents changed seems like a daunting task at first, but it really feels good when it's done. I wish you continued success!

Love always -- Jessica Rose

Thank you :)

Athena!

Congrats on the flurry of on-site and legal name changes!... It certainly is a good feeling to be "official" 💕🤗💕

Onward Brave Sister!

Ashley 😀💕🌻

@Athena
Regarding your official name change ... yes indeed, it is very good news and
it very affirming for you to have your desired name on official documents and licenses.

Wishing you well as you continue on in your journey... and please keep your
updates coming.

HUGS, Danielle

This is part of the message that I just sent to my doctor. I received a letter from the ministry of health that I found kind of odd seeing as I have only been classified as female by the Ontario government for about 5 weeks now.

"On a lighter note I have been classified as female by the Ontario government for the last 5 weeks or so. I just today I received a letter from the ministry of health. I must regretfully decline their kind suggestion that it is time to get a PaP smear. Seeing as I do not yet have a vagina nor am I likely to ever get a cervix."

LOL!

I had a new nurse asking me routine pre-exam questions. She asked when I had my last period. Looked me in the eye, smiled, and said, "Right. No uterus." We both got a laugh out of that.

 :)

Hi Athena

Congratulations on changing your name and some of your documents, I wish you all the success in the future in changing the remaining documents.

What Jessica has written in the following quote, is extremely sound advice.  Change all the documents you can possibly do.  It will save you a lot hassle in the future.

Quote from: Jessica_Rose on February 04, 2024, 04:52:54 PMYea! I highly recommend updating name and gender as quickly as possible once that become an option. It sounds like you're well on the way to getting this taken care of. Having all of your identity paperwork matching your desired name and gender is extremely important. It's difficult to know if open doors will suddenly close. I hope the rest of the paperwork goes smoothly.

Love always -- Jess

As Danielle says and I agree with her.

Quote from: Northern Star Girl on February 15, 2024, 06:32:56 PM... it very affirming for you to have your desired name on official documents and licenses....

I would also like to hear more on what is happening in your life, especially changing your name on those documents.

Take care and all the best for the future.

Best Wishes and Hugs
Sarah B

@Athena
Dear Athena:
Hey girl, your special day is tomorrow, Monday, May 6th.
   
      It's your B I R T H D A Y
      :icon_bunch:  :icon_bunch:  :icon_birthday:  :icon_birthday:  :icon_birthday:  :icon_bunch:  :icon_bunch:

I hope that your special day is filled with happiness...
                    ... with cake and candles
                          ... ice cream 
.... celebrating with special friends and family
      .... and perhaps gifts

HUGS and best wishes to you on your Birthday,
Danielle
                          (https://i.imgur.com/snhfvPom.jpg)

November 12 with Dr Brassard

Update September 3 is new date

 @Athena
This is terrific news....  September 3rd will arrive faster than
you think.... 

Thank you for sharing your update.
HUGS, and more HUGS,
Danielle

Quote from: Athena on June 12, 2024, 09:45:56 AMUpdate September 3 is new date

New Tattoo

That's beautiful!

Sigh 30 days left to go :(

@Athena
Dear Athena:
The countdown to your surgery continues... 
Wishing you (and your doctor) success!

... and your hand/butterfly tattoo is very pretty...
      (https://i.imgur.com/gzAq206.jpg)
          hand tattoo.jpg
          1.83 MB, 3000x4000
          viewed 38 times

Question: What was your thought in selecting the butterfly????

HUGS, Danielle

Quote from: Athena on June 27, 2024, 07:25:00 AMNew Tattoo

Quote from: Athena on June 12, 2024, 09:45:56 AMUpdate September 3 is new date

Quote from: Athena on August 04, 2024, 07:52:28 PMSigh 30 days left to go :(

Don't worry the time will fly by (pun intended !)

Thank you

Sigh it looks like I might have caught a case of a ->-bleeped-<-. I can't say that they are for sure but it sure seems like it.

Well the person I was concerned about hasn't contacted me since they found out that I was a preop transwoman.

Also I am now off of estrogen until after the surgery.

Things will happen in their own time.
Hang in there, Athena.

I don't know if it was the third mug of coffee today but this is the first time I started to get anxious for the surgery to happen.

Relax dear, no need to worry about stuff beyond your control just trust in the universe and things will be fine.

Off to Montreal tomorrow and surgery on tuesday

@Athena
Dear Athena:
I am wishing you well... and wishing you a successful surgery.
Get rest and heal up.
When you are able, please keep me and the rest of your avid followers
updated...
Many HUGS,❤️❤️❤️
Danielle [Northern Star Girl]

Quote from: Athena on August 31, 2024, 03:06:33 PMOff to Montreal tomorrow and surgery on tuesday

Good luck, Athena!

Our thoughts and prayers are with you.

Hugs!

Lori

Best wishes my dear.

Ouch. It's done thankfully. I must say as a tranbian that dr Brassard looks much better in real life.  He also easily put me at ease eight away.I almost made a Jesus joke but I asked how many do so. She told me that 20% make that joke but I was the only one to ask that.

Also for you older girls I had to laugh because I really wanted to start singing "Always look on the bright side of life"

Hope your recovering well.XX

I feel guilty, I have very little pain to other girls. I just don't find it as painful as others but sitting for the first time really sucked by the end I had to go and lay down

Quote from: Athena on September 05, 2024, 12:06:15 PMI feel guilty, I have very little pain to other girls. I just don't find it as painful as others but sitting for the first time really sucked by the end I had to go and lay down

Don't feel guilty. Everyone has different thresholds of what they consider painful. I've read a few experiences here where others did not find they had much pain. Take it slow. It sounds like you are doing ok. That's good news!

Hugs!

I had low pain just uncomfortable .

I got the packing taken out so I was able to shower for the first time since surgery. I am just so glad to have it done.

That is great news. Now it is just a matter of letting your body heal. Congratulations!

Quote from: Athena on September 08, 2024, 09:42:22 AMI got the packing taken out so I was able to shower for the first time since surgery. I am just so glad to have it done.

Isn't that first shower post-packing amazing?

happy you are unpacked. welcome!

Jenn

Congratulations on all your progress Athena, epically the last.  I glad your recovery is going so well.

Paulie.

Wow is urinating ever different. I also have to say that the monster dialator hurts.  I get to go home tomorrow morning so this should be my last update from my phone

So glad you are healing well and getting to go home. We are happy for you!
I would imagine you will be discovering a lot of things that are different. Even the small stuff can be affirming.

I am happy for you Athena!

Chrissy

Made it home after a 13 hour drive (with stops). Yesterday was ok but I am beat today.

That is a long drive and makes for a long day. Rest and relax, dear. We aren't done with you yet.  ;D

 Sorry for lack of updates I was not feeling that well for the last week and a half.
Tuesday at 5:10 I was outside waiting for the uber that GRS Montreal I then discovered that for some reason the uber cancelled so I had to get my own uber and I was panicked that I wouldn't make it in time but I did. When I checked in I had to fill out some paper work then shortly after I submitted my paperwork I had a nurse come and get me and I was directed to a small room where I had to answer more questions. After I answered the questions I was taken to my room and was given a robe and told to change. A few minutes later doctor Brassard came in to check on me and check my genitals. Shortly after doctor Brassard left a lovely attendant Anistasia came and got me and took me to a another small room where I was left by myself for a while. The anesthesiologist came and saw me for a couple of minutes.
While waiting in the room I was having second thoughts (not severe but still there). Anistasia once again came to take me to the OR and during that time my testicles started to stick to my leg and that resolved any lingering thoughts. The operating table was kind of shaped like a cross so I asked how many people made the Jesus joke, the lady said about 20 % but I was the first one to ask about it. After a bit I was given a first injection in my back and then shortly after that I was given the epidural. As I was waiting there I started to laugh and giggle to myself because I had a hard time not singing "Always look on the bright side of life" from Monty Pythons Life of Brian.
I was laying there watching someone moving the operating lights then I vaguely remember trying to help the attendants shift me to my bed for the next couple of days. when I finally woke up they took a sugar level and a blood pressure. On Wednesday in the afternoon Anistasia came to get me and had me walk around the nurses station and I mentioned the Monty Python song to Anistasia and she started singing it herself.
Thursday I was gathered up and had to walk to the recovery center where I spent the next 6 days. The food at GRS and the recovery center was pretty good, not Michelin star level but that of a good family restaurant.
Sunday I had the major of the packing taken out and the bag removed from the catheter.
Monday I had the catheter taken out and the stent removed. Dialation begins.
Wednesday I had to leave my room at 8 am and my friends came and picked me up.


Sorry my check in time on Tuesday the 3rd was 5:45 and I was on the operating table at 7:30 in the morning.

How are you doing now, no problems I hope and the girl is behaving herself.

Thank you. I had my doctors appointment on Thursday and she was impressed at how well and fast it was healing. The only concerns are a couple of stitches popped early and I am experiencing heavy discharge. The Discharge is normal for the first 4-6 weeks. Even with the stitches that popped early, they are still healing well and I might have a bit bigger of a scar but I am ok with that.

Even wile douching I no longer see bloody emptying. I might get a small bloody spot while wiping but that is it.My sleep is still wonkey but I had issues with sleep for a while now.

The only thing that I maybe regret is actually going with the canal. I am not keen on dialating and I really hate making saline solution. 

(https://i.imgur.com/j7ykgwt.jpeg)

Every time I think about it I am ever so happy that I have had my surgery.

@Athena
Dear Athena:
I am so very, very happy for you and I am so glad that you were able to get
you much desired surgery.   

Thank you for posing the terrific picture of you and your little friend.
You both look very relaxed!!!

Again, thank you for sharing your message and your picture.
HUGS, Danielle  [Northern Star Girl]

Heh sorry for no cautionary warning about how ugly I am. The picture was after I woke up from anesthesia for the second or third time. The lady in the bed next to me told my that apparently I waved to her in the recovery room which I don't remember. Then the second time I vaguely remember someone in the other bed and that I tried to help them move me to my bed. The third time was when I was aware enough to ask Anistasia to take the picture for me. I was still pretty out of it but I only pretended to be asleep. :P

One thing that people should know about before getting SRS is the 4-6 weeks of heavy discharge. It's disgusting.

Quote from: Athena on September 25, 2024, 09:51:38 AMOne thing that people should know about before getting SRS is the 4-6 weeks of heavy discharge. It's disgusting.

That would be bothersome, but healing takes time and everyone's body heals at a different rate.

But overall, how are you doing? No regrets? Are you up and walking around?

Hopefully, the nastiness will soon be a thing of the past and you can get on with the business of living your life as YOU.

Big Hugs!

I was up walking around 2 days after the surgery. Zero regrets about the GRS just a bit about going with the canal.

I seem to be healing very well and fairly quickly.

Quote from: Athena on September 25, 2024, 10:17:36 AMI was up walking around 2 days after the surgery. Zero regrets about the GRS just a bit about going with the canal.

I seem to be healing very well and fairly quickly.

That is good news! I am glad it is going well. Maybe as it heals more you will be happy you went with that option. I know that sometimes I second guess my decisions, but later I remember how I arrived at that decision in the first place.

What's that old saying?

"When you are up to your ass in alligators it is difficult to remember that you came here to drain the swamp."

Hang in there. You got this.  :-*

Sorry I haven't updated about my recovery for a while.

Starting in October the pain from dilating seemed to go away and fortunately for me my screwing around with my dilation schedule didn't appear to have negatively affected me. I started following the schedule that GRS Montreal suggests and I plan on following it just a month pushed back. I am dilating 4 times a day now and the only real issue is the amount of time it takes out of my day. I have started listening to tic tok while dilating and now a half hour fly's by there is no real pain and the sitz bath can be comforting. I have just recently stopped using dilator 3 and now I just use dilator 4 for 30 + minutes, last night I did it for over 50 minutes as I was busy and had to miss a dilation. In September I could barely keep the number 4 in for more than 5 minutes because of pain but now it's just time consuming.

In September I really regretted going with the canal and had a really hard time justifying dilating but now not so much. It is actually a nice break and me time while dilating now. I still have no real plans for using my canal but I no longer regret it. Like I said earlier the only real concern is the amount of time out of the day that is required for the prep, dilation, clean up , shower/sitz bath , douche and the air drying time 4 times a day.

@Athena
Dear Athena:
Thank you for your update regarding your surgery recovery and necessary tasks related
to followup with Dilation, etc.
I agree... I am more than certain that you will not regret going "all the way" with
the "canal" procedure.

Thank you for your update, please continue to keep us all updated as you continue on.

HUGS, Danielle

Well tonight I just learned something else about dilating.

I was laying there for about 40-45 minutes dilating, I was watching tic tok so the time went by fairly quickly. For some bright reason my dumb butt decided to pull the dilator out rather quickly. It turns out that when you do so, it causes a vacuum effect which can be uncomfortable for a little while.

So please if you are dilating take the dilator out in a slow gentle manner, you will appreciate it.

OUCH!

Also, try not to cough or sneeze. You don't want to launch a torpedo.

Love always -- Jessica Rose

New Tattoo on my right butt cheek

(https://i.imgur.com/x5g01Jm.jpeg)

Hey all sorry for no updates in a while. My neighbours dog passed away a few weeks ago and I was hit really hard by her passing.

I just got off a video call with my endo and he agreed to start me on progesterone which makes me really happy. My lack of breast growth and no nipples to speak of have really been bothering me so I am hoping this works. I am trying to get off of my antidepressants as they really aren't doing anything for me but when I tried to start reducing them I got to a point where I was ready to cut my own face off, I didn't think I had a knife sharp enough forgetting about the exacto knife. I went back to the full dose the day after that so I am not so ready to cut my face off anymore.

In about an hour I off to get my third tattoo it's another one on my hand so I am not looking forward to the next couple hours.

I think you will find that the progesterone really starts things moving for breast development. It does in people with ovaries, so should be part of our protocol too.

Usually, prescribers follow outdated guidelines and only prescribe a once-a-day-before-bedtime dose. Ovaries produce progesterone 24/7 so it makes more sense to take smaller doses several times per day. That is what I do.

Just be aware that progesterone can make you feel tired or sleepy, and if you suffer from depression, taking it during the day is not the best for you. Taking it before bed means you sleep through the sleepiness, depression, and dizziness that are common at the higher doses. YMMV.

I am happy that you are finally getting it though.

(https://i.imgur.com/TV7YqPu.jpeg)




Latest tattoo

I've heard that Progesterone can have emotional side effects. I have not experienced this but have had wild dreams while on it. Anyway, keep the sharp knives out of reach to be safe.

Best of the season all

You too, Athena!
You are truly a blessing.

Merry Christmas Athena!

Chrissy

Bleh I just got an infection in one of my teeth yesterday. My face has really swollen up and I've temporarily lost about 50% vision in my left eye because of swelling. I can't go out and about because people may worry about me being a victim of domestic violence (not to make light of DV). The swelling around my eye is red and may look like bruising.

Next thursday I have to get 2 teeth pulled YAY!!

Oh ouch!

Dental pain is the worst. I would rather have a migraine than a toothache.
I hope it resolves quickly.

Congratulations ❤️

An interesting situation happened the other day. I was exposed to stimuli that I haven't bothered with for a while then oops out popped my libido. For the first time since September 3 I might have felt a very minor regret for getting the surgery. I allowed my libido to take charge and even though for the first time I am glad for the canal, I think that it might have been easier to come to a happy ending before the surgery. It still felt very nice though.

I hope this wasn't TMI

https://www.letschic.shop/products/vacation-elegant-irregular-dress-e2aa

https://www.letschic.shop/products/vacation-elegant-irregular-dress-82c2

https://www.letschic.shop/products/hand-stitched-irregular-dress-895f

Quote from: Athena on March 09, 2025, 01:15:59 PMhttps://www.letschic.shop/products/hand-stitched-irregular-dress-895f

That's beautiful! I really like that one.

It was hard but I kept it to those 3. Later on I will definitely get more.

They look lovely dear.

I'm thinking
https://www.temu.com/goods.html?_bg_fs=1&goods_id=601099662085573&sku_id=17592762752129&_x_ns_irclickid=WfpRN0SYjxyKTZeVAe1Tj0GZUks1kWwV3wbp1k0&_x_ads_account=18350&_x_ads_id=1580294&_x_ns_iradname=Online%20Tracking%20Link&_x_ns_iradsize=&_x_ns_prodsku=&_x_ns_irmptype=mediapartner&_x_ns_sharedid=&_x_ns_ts=1741552963000&_x_ns_randint=7416125&_x_ns_adtype=ONLINE_TRACKING_LINK&_x_ns_irmpgroupname=%22cx%22&_x_ads_channel=impact&_x_ns_mp_value2=&_x_ns_mp_value3=&_x_ns_irmpname=adMarketplace&_x_ns_irpid=3798038&_x_vst_scene=adg&_x_sessn_id=h0v8ne4dbn&refer_page_name=bgt_order_detail&refer_page_id=10045_1741552987597_3njrgykd6d&refer_page_sn=10045

Plus
https://www.letschic.shop/products/vacation-elegant-irregular-dress-82c2

Quote from: Athena on March 09, 2025, 01:15:59 PMhttps://www.letschic.shop/products/vacation-elegant-irregular-dress-e2aa

https://www.letschic.shop/products/vacation-elegant-irregular-dress-82c2

https://www.letschic.shop/products/hand-stitched-irregular-dress-895f

Amazing dresses 👗 😍 So girly,stylish

(https://i.imgur.com/cacR8DC.jpeg)


New Kitten

Such a cutie!

My doctor said something interesting today. She said "you aren't trans anymore you are a woman".

Quote from: Athena on April 15, 2025, 04:36:51 PMMy doctor said something interesting today. She said "you aren't trans anymore you are a woman".

She is a medical professional. You can believe her!  ;D

I just wish that all trans people could have the sudden burst of euphoria that I just had. I was putting clothes into a wish list and I realized that I don't have to hide anymore. When I get new underwear I don't have to get the boring ones that I used to buy that could pass as men's underwear. I can now choose the cute panties I want to wear. I can focus on skirts and dresses that I very much prefer to wear and only look at leggings that make a statement.

I may have regretted going with the canal in my GRS but I have never once regretted the surgery itself and when I sometimes run my hands over my body and that unsightly bulge isn't there anymore I just feel so grateful.
I realize that I am extremely fortunate as I had my surgery paid for by my provincial health insurance and I know that isn't an option for so many which is disheartening and I wish all the best.