I have always liked women. But since I have come out I seem to be becoming more and more attrated to men? Will I stop liking women? Why the change. I have never found men attractive till now! ???
You might have always been into men and your transition is merely justification for that.
I don't think so, if I liked men as a guy I would just stay a guy, why go through all the trouble of transitioning. I don't need justification to like what I like. But its all of a sudden.
+1 to this!
We need more HETERO women here... but I'll take BISEXUAL as well since you still like women
You are just a pervert and you need to see a psychiatrist. :icon_lalala: :icon_joy: :icon_lol:
That wasn't very nice Fionabell! Why am I a pervert if I started liking men?
Quote from: MyAlias on December 29, 2011, 10:01:23 PM
That wasn't very nice Fionabell! Why am I a pervert if I started liking men?
She is just joking, :)
Welcome to the hetero world... or at least bisexual, heh
I've only liked men my entire life, but estrogen minus testosterone equaled "That guy smells gooooooooood" ... today I had to switch vehicles with a guy I work with and I had to get something out of the floorboard on the drivers side and I smelled him and found myself with my eyes closed for a split second and my mouth watering.
And it's not like I have a crush on him. He's a short, snobby know-it-all that gets pissy if anybody every disagrees with him.
Maybe because that's how we roll, as humans. Funny creatures, we are.
I've always dated men and almost always slept with men. I thought maybe when I transitioned I would like women more, or at least want to spend more time finding out. The opposite happened. The longer I'm on T and the more male I feel, the less interest I have in women.
Again, biology and sexuality are strange planes to occupy.
Quote from: MyAlias on December 29, 2011, 10:01:23 PM
That wasn't very nice Fionabell! Why am I a pervert if I started liking men?
I'm sorry. i like men too. Well I like their bodies and penis but not their head and what's in it ;D
Quote from: fionabell on December 29, 2011, 10:39:39 PM
I'm sorry. i like men too. Well I like their bodies and penis but not their head and what's in it ;D
Kia Ora Fiona,
::) With some men their penis 'is' their head, think about it ;) ;D
Metta Zenda :)
Quote from: Mahsa the disco shark on December 29, 2011, 09:35:14 PM
You might have always been into men and your transition is merely justification for that.
Kia Ora Elle,
::) I'm inclined to agree with you...
Metta Zenda :)
Quote from: MyAlias on December 29, 2011, 09:34:39 PM
I have always liked women. But since I have come out I seem to be becoming more and more attrated to men? Will I stop liking women? Why the change. I have never found men attractive till now! ???
What we like depends on a lot of things, including when/how/why endorphins ("happy hormones") are released in the brain.
Sometimes I wonder how much hetero- and homosexuality are determined by internal wiring, as opposed to true "personal choice."
In the meantime...just go with it. Enjoy!
Quote from: Beth Andrea on December 29, 2011, 11:20:20 PM
In the meantime...just go with it. Enjoy!
This. If you like it, go with it. But if you are looking for a "why," letting loose an important part of your life can cause major changes, or reveal deeply hidden feelings. For example, for my job and just in general, I dress totally guy-like; jeans and a t-shirt. And I've always been uber casual, ever since I was first able to dress myself. I hated to get dressed up (still do, for guy stuff). But now that I am semi-openly trans, I looove getting dressed up in cute outfits. You'd be amazed at what changes can occur.
Quote from: MyAlias on December 29, 2011, 09:34:39 PM
I have always liked women. But since I have come out I seem to be becoming more and more attrated to men? Will I stop liking women? Why the change. I have never found men attractive till now! ???
Why don't you put money where your mouth is? Gimme an idea of what kind of man you find attractive by posting pictures in my other thread called "Post Your Idea of The Perfect Guy"!
A large amount of attraction is chemical so replacing testosterone with estrogen will allow you to be amendable to male sexual allure.
Surely? :'( :icon_yes:
Quote from: MyAlias on December 29, 2011, 09:34:39 PM
I have always liked women. But since I have come out I seem to be becoming more and more attrated to men? Will I stop liking women? Why the change. I have never found men attractive till now! ???
Sounds like you've discovered the light coming through the closet door. Now move those christmas presents from 1998 and open the door and see the rainbows and the half naked twink on your bed.
It's amazing what bursts out of the toybox when you open the lid.
I have started to find men attractive, after considering myself to be a lesbian since starting transition, but I can't see a long term relationship. I don't think it is possible to escape the power struggle that seems to be inherent in most heterosexual relationships, but that's just me.
Hormones are powerful and subtle, so I wouldn't rule out their involvement either in any change of orientation.
If the right person comes along and you get the fireworks and butterflies in the tummy, then all bets are off anyway! Take care and have fun is all that matters really.
Karen.
Quote from: MyAlias on December 29, 2011, 09:34:39 PM
I have always liked women. But since I have come out I seem to be becoming more and more attrated to men? Will I stop liking women? Why the change. I have never found men attractive till now! ???
From a clinical point of view, I think it is a multiple of factors.
Relating from my own experience, I never found men as exciting as women. From a physical aspect I could appreciate a muscular, well built man, like the image of DaVinci's "David", but I never felt any attraction to them. Women's soft curves and tender skin always seemed magical to me.
Now...
I still consider myself lesbian and I am in a committed lesbian relationship, and I still find women alluring.
However, over the course of my transition and my time on HRT, I have found the male form to be
interesting.
Very interesting. The hard body and body hair that I found so disgusting on me, I find very sensual on men.
I have had intercourse with men and while the experiences were fun, did not live up to my expectations. I won't go into the details, because they would be too salacious for this forum. But think
wam-bam-thank-you-mam...
But still the
idea of men can still make my toes curl.
I personally think that as the cross hormone therapy changes our bodies, it also changes our brains. It opens pathways within our most powerful sexual organ, the brain. And, as I contend and more documentation shows, we have basically female brains to one extent or another, we become more hetero-normative.
Also from a social integration standpoint, as we transition to our proper place in society we allow ourselves the freedom to look at men in a new light. When previously we may have been so closeted as to deny any thoughts of having sexual relations with men.
I personally think it is primarily a primordial sexual urge driven by our newly re-wired brains. Because when I try to rationally imagine having a true on-going relationship with a man as a partner and husband, it all falls apart. Realistically, no man would really want a woman like me. Pushing 60, sterile, a family of my own, and oh by the way, I was born with a outdoor plumbing. If he didn't have a problem with it, someone he knew would have a problem with it. Either his family, or his friends, or whatever. And that usually puts an end to it.
See Calperia Addams three steps to dating a man. It's true. There is no fourth date.
Bottom line is, accept and go on. This is who we are. And the one thing we have learned through this process is to allow ourselves to sit back and enjoy the ride.
-Sandy
Don't worry about it. I sortta felt the same way for a while and ended up marrying a very nice guy. You never know where you'll end up. Just go with the flow.
Chin up!
Cindi
Quote from: Mahsa the disco shark on December 29, 2011, 09:35:14 PM
You might have always been into men ...
I agree with this part.
I think in time, certain very specific things "trigger" previously unknown things within our minds. Transition, coming out, feeling more feminine, whatever, may have triggered you to discover and recognize that you find men attractive. Though I certainly have NO scientific evidence to support this, it's just the way I see it. Whether or not you choose to act on it is beside the point. As everyone else said; don't fear it or reject it, accept and embrace it. It's another discovery along the path of becoming you, and when it happened to me, I found it to be puzzling at first yet exciting as well. Now, I find men more "eye pleasingly" attractive than women (women more in a beautiful sense, relating more to feelings of envy than lust); though neither sexually attractive.
Quote from: Sandy on December 30, 2011, 06:38:38 AM
I have had intercourse with men and while the experiences were fun, did not live up to my expectations. I won't go into the details, because they would be too salacious for this forum. But think wam-bam-thank-you-mam...
-Sandy
Are we all Puritans here or what? I don't think we will run screaming for the hills if you share your details...
C'mon,
bisexual sis... ;)
Quote from: MyAlias on December 29, 2011, 09:34:39 PM
I have always liked women. But since I have come out I seem to be becoming more and more attrated to men? Will I stop liking women? Why the change. I have never found men attractive till now! ???
Interesting thing is, that a lot of transitioners that have previously only been into the, quote, "opposite" of their Birth-assigned Sex, finds themselves to during HRT instead start getting more and more attracted to the Gender which the transitioner is physically becoming the opposite of.
A friend of mine that had always been "fully" Bisexual, an MTF, found herself after roughly one or two years on HRT, to more or less only be interested in males, and on top of that, now seemed to find female genitals almost repulsive, despite having been very fond of them before.
It would be easy to blame these types of changes in orientation on the hormonal influence on the brain, if it were not for the fact that it may actually also go the other way around; That a transitioner insteads turns practically homosexual during or after the change.
Either it is a matter of hormones, or, a matter of psychology, or, which I find the most likely, a matter of both and something that have different causes for each transitioner. As said, am leaning the most towards the last part, as both Psychology aswell as Hormonal influency are two fully recognized factors for big mental changes during transiton, both for MTF's aswell as FTM's.
It would be most interesting if thorough research would be done in this area.
Quote from: MsDazzler on December 30, 2011, 11:55:48 AM
Are we all Puritans here or what? I don't think we will run screaming for the hills if you share your details...
C'mon, bisexual sis... ;)
It's not that I wouldn't. However TOS Rule #5:
Quote5. The posting of messages on the chat or forums which are of a threatening tone, obscene, pornographic, intended to titillate, or depict illegal acts will not be permitted.
The posting would be obscene, pornographic, titillating, and possibly illegal depending on the state, county, country or the uniform code of military justice... :police:
However, think:
"Steamy back seats in the dead of night,
furtive middle of the night rendezvous,
drunken one night stands,
lips to lips,
lips on skin - everywhere,
rushed co-undressing,
hands rushing grabbing exposed skin,
hot breath on skin,
perspiration,
painful lack of lubrication,
fingernails on back, teeth on shoulders,
almost climaxing but never quite getting there - ever(!),
lonely beds."
-Sandy
Quote from: fionabell on December 30, 2011, 12:58:29 AM
A large amount of attraction is chemical so replacing testosterone with estrogen will allow you to be amendable to male sexual allure.
Surely? :'( :icon_yes:
I wonder if FTMs who were heterosexual (into men) prior to transitioning can vouch for this - is there any FTM who used to like men only, but now open to women too because of replacing their estrogen with testosterone?
Quote from: Sandy on December 30, 2011, 01:13:08 PM
It's not that I wouldn't. However TOS Rule #5:
The posting would be obscene, pornographic, titillating, and possibly illegal depending on the state, county, country or the uniform code of military justice... :police:
However, think:
"Steamy back seats in the dead of night,
furtive middle of the night rendezvous,
drunken one night stands,
lips to lips,
lips on skin - everywhere,
rushed co-undressing,
hands rushing grabbing exposed skin,
hot breath on skin,
perspiration,
painful lack of lubrication,
fingernails on back, teeth on shoulders,
almost climaxing but never quite getting there - ever(!),
lonely beds."
-Sandy
There is a TOS against sexually explicit messages? I think we were pretty explicit in the sexuality part of the forum.... of cousre I know the F*** word is bleeped out
Quote from: MsDazzler on December 30, 2011, 01:26:14 PM
I wonder if FTMs who were heterosexual (into men) prior to transitioning can vouch for this - is there any FTM who used to like men only, but now open to women too because of replacing their estrogen with testosterone?
There was an experiment using rats and the ftm starting humping the female rats. I think that's really the most accurate assessment you are likely to get.
Thank you all for your responses.
Quote from: Mahsa the disco shark on December 29, 2011, 09:35:14 PM
You might have always been into men and your transition is merely justification for that.
Quote from: Zenda on December 29, 2011, 11:11:00 PM
Kia Ora Elle,
::) I'm inclined to agree with you...
Metta Zenda :)
Sorry Zenda but No! I have never found men attractive or interesting sexually, i have never checked out a guy or wanted to be with a guy before any of this, they never crossed my mind.
Quote from: MsDazzler on December 29, 2011, 11:35:50 PM
Why don't you put money where your mouth is? Gimme an idea of what kind of man you find attractive by posting pictures in my other thread called "Post Your Idea of The Perfect Guy"!
The Guys on their are pretty darn good examples of what is currently making my mouth water, all except SATO TAKERU, sorry Assoluta! but i am attratcted to very femme guys too.
This pic right here: The middle guy, mmm....mmmm...mmm i'm just waiting for him to pull the pants lower since he is looking out to see who is watching him before he shows me.... um anyways!! sorry got lost a bit
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg7206.cl1.imagevenue.com%2Fimages%2Floc537%2F76124_Picture_3_123_537lo.png&hash=a005b220402db1eb019da84ccea2f6ca5c14db68)(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F4.bp.blogspot.com%2F-71VL53fJp1U%2FTtE3o2Co9KI%2FAAAAAAAAwjs%2FYGExamPq1QY%2Fs1600%2F%2B_lurmuxXIXs1qc0vxho1_500.jpg&hash=f311b282ce4d07be486d6c678b2059d050c6a52b)(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm5.staticflickr.com%2F4114%2F4880698204_c5b000b14c.jpg&hash=15eb87a97354781c8ba2fcae79cb6325df49cd08)
[/quote]
Quote from: Mahsa the disco shark on December 30, 2011, 01:00:21 AM
Sounds like you've discovered the light coming through the closet door. Now move those christmas presents from 1998 and open the door and see the rainbows and the half naked twink on your bed.
haha.. good one Mahsa, what is a twink?
I like the following and seem to make a little more sense, but I still want to know why, the change. so sudden, just like a flip of a switch!
Quote from: Beth Andrea on December 29, 2011, 11:20:20 PM
What we like depends on a lot of things, including when/how/why endorphins ("happy hormones") are released in the brain.
Sometimes I wonder how much hetero- and homosexuality are determined by internal wiring, as opposed to true "personal choice."
In the meantime...just go with it. Enjoy!
and I cant' just go with it! I don't want to be with them as a guy, but as a woman.
Quote from: fionabell on December 29, 2011, 10:39:39 PM
I'm sorry. i like men too. Well I like their bodies and penis but not their head and what's in it ;D
A large amount of attraction is chemical so replacing testosterone with estrogen will allow you to be amendable to male sexual allure.
Surely? :'( :icon_yes:
I like thier bodies now too and the penis which repulsed me before seems very alluring now, not all but some.
Quote from: stldrmgrl on December 30, 2011, 11:22:01 AM
I agree with this part.
I think in time, certain very specific things "trigger" previously unknown things within our minds. Transition, coming out, feeling more feminine, whatever, may have triggered you to discover and recognize that you find men attractive. Though I certainly have NO scientific evidence to support this, it's just the way I see it. Whether or not you choose to act on it is beside the point. As everyone else said; don't fear it or reject it, accept and embrace it. It's another discovery along the path of becoming you, and when it happened to me, I found it to be puzzling at first yet exciting as well. Now, I find men more "eye pleasingly" attractive than women (women more in a beautiful sense, relating more to feelings of envy than lust); though neither sexually attractive.
but how, why, i was never attracted to them, it could be you make sense too! still i do not know what triggered it!
Quote from: Cindi Jones on December 30, 2011, 07:32:06 AM
Don't worry about it. I sortta felt the same way for a while and ended up marrying a very nice guy. You never know where you'll end up. Just go with the flow.
Chin up!
Cindi
That is wonderful,I am so happy for you!
Quote from: Sandy on December 30, 2011, 06:38:38 AM
From a clinical point of view, I think it is a multiple of factors.
Relating from my own experience, I never found men as exciting as women. From a physical aspect I could appreciate a muscular, well built man, like the image of DaVinci's "David", but I never felt any attraction to them. Women's soft curves and tender skin always seemed magical to me.
Now...
I still consider myself lesbian and I am in a committed lesbian relationship, and I still find women alluring.
However, over the course of my transition and my time on HRT, I have found the male form to be interesting. Very interesting. The hard body and body hair that I found so disgusting on me, I find very sensual on men.
I have had intercourse with men and while the experiences were fun, did not live up to my expectations. I won't go into the details, because they would be too salacious for this forum. But think wam-bam-thank-you-mam...
But still the idea of men can still make my toes curl.
I personally think that as the cross hormone therapy changes our bodies, it also changes our brains. It opens pathways within our most powerful sexual organ, the brain. And, as I contend and more documentation shows, we have basically female brains to one extent or another, we become more hetero-normative.
Also from a social integration standpoint, as we transition to our proper place in society we allow ourselves the freedom to look at men in a new light. When previously we may have been so closeted as to deny any thoughts of having sexual relations with men.
I personally think it is primarily a primordial sexual urge driven by our newly re-wired brains. Because when I try to rationally imagine having a true on-going relationship with a man as a partner and husband, it all falls apart. Realistically, no man would really want a woman like me. Pushing 60, sterile, a family of my own, and oh by the way, I was born with a outdoor plumbing. If he didn't have a problem with it, someone he knew would have a problem with it. Either his family, or his friends, or whatever. And that usually puts an end to it.
See Calperia Addams three steps to dating a man. It's true. There is no fourth date.
Bottom line is, accept and go on. This is who we are. And the one thing we have learned through this process is to allow ourselves to sit back and enjoy the ride.
-Sandy
ouch Michelangelo's David!!!
Yes he is quite an attractive guy isn't it?
I believe that changes are not related to chemicals, but to how we perceive ourself (chemical just sign a point of no return in the progress of mind transitioning, and they do it everyday ) and as more I perceive myself woman As more I feel my real emotions toward everything, included men.
Thus I mean I am starting to have the easy teardrop, i am very emotional, also if i try to act normally, and as much as i like more girl things, i am discovering of being more attracted by men than by women ( still i like them, but more as wish of becoming like them!).
Pretty normal stuff!!!
I guess the first poster is in the same situation.
I think this is a good thing of transitioning so i wouldn't worry that much.
Maybe it can become uncomfortable sitting near a nice guy, and couldn't do anything to seduce him, but well this happens when you liked girls too so u should e bacquainted with fantasies. I am.
The real problem in transitioning is all the time wishing normal things, like proper clothes, the possibility to buy make up and use it everyday without look like a clown, and the horrible deformities of the body (the ugliness in between the legs ) and sooo on!
Quote from: fionabell on December 30, 2011, 01:41:37 PM
There was an experiment using rats and the ftm starting humping the female rats. I think that's really the most accurate assessment you are likely to get.
I believe you may be referring to the Austrian Physiologist and pioneering Endocrinologist Eugene Steinarch, that in 1912 studied Gender-charactaristic behaviour by implanting Sexual Glands into the opposite Sex of his guinea pigs. For instance, and just as you said, implanting testicles on the female guinea pig, which resulted in the female developing male charactaristics and behaviour, and resulted in the female trying to mount the castrated male partner, that, too, had started to feminize aswell after Eugene had removed their testicles.
Quote from: MsDazzler on December 30, 2011, 01:27:10 PM
There is a TOS against sexually explicit messages? I think we were pretty explicit in the sexuality part of the forum.... of cousre I know the F*** word is bleeped out
I can be as lascivious as the next girl, but, yeah, the amount of detail that go into a post, regardless of the forum (even the sexuality one), is restricted.
Susan's is "spidered" regularly, and having it pop up in the porno sites on google is not wanted.
But if you want all the juicy details, PM me and I can get as down and dirty as I want. ;) ;) :icon_censored: (or not :icon_redface:)
wink, wink, nudge, nudge...-Sandy
sexualety is strange, I like to think about it as being fluent in general, so even the most straight guy or girl could once in his entire life hit by a person and thinking he/she where hot and never admit it so.
--
funny thing is I know a ftm who was dating a girl before trandition and after he turned gay,
for me I been into guys, manly, I am still bisexual but laterly I been felling alittle more into girls.
sadly I dont relate to them, girls are pretty complicated.
Kia Ora,
::) With all said and done...Have you ever wondered why it is HRT does not 'cure' the homosexual who wants to be heterosexual ? Or why it seems to have no impact upon other trans-people's sexual orientation ?
::) I'm also under the impression if one is brought up in an environment where homosexuality is the worse kind of sin ever,["YOU WILL BURN IN HELL IF YOU FEEL THIS WAY>>>BURN IN HELL I TELL YOU !"] the stigma attached to having such feelings [ pre everything-that is at a young age having what is 'mistakenly' felt to be 'same-sex' attraction]could leave a traumatic impression upon ones sponge-like easy influenced mind, pushing those feelings deeper within the closet of denial, and they only begin to resurface once ones true gender identity starts to take hold...
* BTW it can also enters ones mind in a subliminal way, friends, family, work colleagues, telling what they feel are harmless 'homophobic' jokes, the sweet old ladies, mothers, aunties, grandmothers frowning and passing negative comments[gossiping] when they see a person displaying obvious homosexual behaviour...It can all add up and take it's toll on a fragile mind *....
::) But in saying all this, it doesn't really matter what one believes, just so long as they are comfortable with how things turn out...[This all being said by an asexual bi-romantic/affectionate women who seems to have the best of both worlds with no strings *sexual hang ups* attached :D ;D ]
Metta Zenda :)
Quote from: Zenda on December 30, 2011, 03:29:42 PM
Kia Ora,
::) With all said and done...Have you ever wondered why it is HRT does not 'cure' the homosexual who wants to be heterosexual ? Or why it seems to have no impact upon other trans-people's sexual orientation ?
::) I'm also under the impression if one is brought up in an environment where homosexuality is the worse kind of sin ever,["YOU WILL BURN IN HELL IF YOU FEEL THIS WAY>>>BURN IN HELL I TELL YOU !"] the stigma attached to having such feelings [ pre everything-that is at a young age having what is 'mistakenly' felt to be 'same-sex' attraction]could leave a traumatic impression upon ones sponge-like easy influenced mind, pushing those feelings deeper within the closet of denial, and they only begin to resurface once ones true gender identity starts to take hold...
* BTW it can also enters ones mind in a subliminal way, friends, family, work colleagues, telling what they feel are harmless 'homophobic' jokes, the sweet old ladies, mothers, aunties, grandmothers frowning and passing negative comments[gossiping] when they see a person displaying obvious homosexual behaviour...It can all add up and take it's toll on a fragile mind *....
::) But in saying all this, it doesn't really matter what one believes, just so long as they are comfortable with how things turn out...[This all being said by an asexual bi-romantic/affectionate women who seems to have the best of both worlds with no strings *sexual hang ups* attached :D ;D ]
Metta Zenda :)
Before hormones I was 100% into guys. However my sex drive was nowhere near as strong as you would consider a guys hormones to be. Since taking hormones, I notice guys WAYYY more, and my desire to have sex with guys is 10 fold stronger than it used to be. I used to never know if a guy had been in an elevator before me, now it's like.. very quickly noticable. For these reasons, I have no doubt in my mind whatsoever that estrogen has an effect on sexual attractiveness to men in at least some people.
Quote from: MsDazzler on December 29, 2011, 09:51:45 PM
+1 to this!
We need more HETERO women here... but I'll take BISEXUAL as well since you still like women
Sign me up for the HETERO women line.
Far as my own experience, before coming out I always had this 'weird vibe' about men and never considered it to be a sexual attraction. I was so hell-bent on being a regular guy I tried to just force it out of my mind on why I would steal glances at some guys and freak out/get butterflies other times when I was close enough to smell them (?) or have a great conversation/friendship intamcy with some and think to myself 'this is really nice' but shouldn't feel this way...
As a caveat, I haven't begun HRT yet so maybe that will throw me for an unexpected loop.
BUT as I have at least started the process of being comfortable feeling and expressing myself as a woman, I'm totally OK with being completely man-hungry.
And awesome thread you've started MsDazzler. I will be carefully and thoroughly reviewing all entries - for ahem, scientific purposes of course, ahem - before making my own recommendations. :o
Quote from: Bishounen on December 30, 2011, 02:11:48 PM
I believe you may be referring to the Austrian Physiologist and pioneering Endocrinologist Eugene Steinarch, that in 1912 studied Gender-charactaristic behaviour by implanting Sexual Glands into the opposite Sex of his guinea pigs. For instance, and just as you said, implanting testicles on the female guinea pig, which resulted in the female developing male charactaristics and behaviour, and resulted in the female trying to mount the castrated male partner, that, too, had started to feminize aswell after Eugene had removed their testicles.
They can't transplant testicles silly! That's ridiculous
Quote from: Herwinteress on December 30, 2011, 04:52:27 PM
And awesome thread you've started MsDazzler.
uh this is my thread!
Come to the dark side.
We have cockies.
Quote from: Cindi Jones on December 30, 2011, 07:32:06 AM
You never know where you'll end up. Just go with the flow.
Well I never realized Id end up a fulltime housewife and married to a guy. Before my transition I was never sexual attracted to guys, then starting transition, it was a number of factors, replacing my testosterone with estrogen Iv always believed changed my sexual orientation, the attention I now received from guys, Im now very comfortable as a woman just wanting a handsome man, a gentleman who knows how to treat a woman, Im now married to that kind of guy, since my transition I could never have a sexual relationship with another woman, Im now a hetro lady, this thread has come up before and will come up again https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,103902.msg779292.html#msg779292 (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,103902.msg779292.html#msg779292)
Quote from: Herwinteress on December 30, 2011, 04:52:27 PM
Sign me up for the HETERO women line.
Far as my own experience, before coming out I always had this 'weird vibe' about men and never considered it to be a sexual attraction. I was so hell-bent on being a regular guy I tried to just force it out of my mind on why I would steal glances at some guys and freak out/get butterflies other times when I was close enough to smell them (?) or have a great conversation/friendship intamcy with some and think to myself 'this is really nice' but shouldn't feel this way...
As a caveat, I haven't begun HRT yet so maybe that will throw me for an unexpected loop.
BUT as I have at least started the process of being comfortable feeling and expressing myself as a woman, I'm totally OK with being completely man-hungry.
And awesome thread you've started MsDazzler. I will be carefully and thoroughly reviewing all entries - for ahem, scientific purposes of course, ahem - before making my own recommendations. :o
thanks but it is not my thread :)
but since you identify as hetero, get your ass in my other thread "post your idea of the perfect guy!" and contribute! :)
Has anyone experienced a change in their sexual orientation between accepting you are a Female/Woman/Trans, and starting HRT?
I noticed my "orientation" changed after I accepted what I am, realized one day that I liked Men, and hey I'm a Heterosexual Woman! Where did that come from? I thought I settled this issue as a "guy", but hey...this feels different now, like a burden has been lifted or that it now feels "right"...no internal conflict about it anymore.
And I haven't started HRT yet either and that was 6 months ago.
Quote from: fionabell on December 30, 2011, 06:17:45 PM
They can't transplant testicles silly! That's ridiculous
Ever tried "Search", 'Silly'? ;)
But okay, I will do that for you. :)
Wikipedia article on Eugene Steinach:
QuoteBy 1912 he had conducted experiments in the transplantation of a male guinea pig's testes into a female and the castration of the male
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eugen_Steinach (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eugen_Steinach)
Further from the discussion page:
QuoteIn mammals, too, for example in the rat, the development of somatic and psychic sex characteristics (seminal vesicles, prostate, erotization), is controlled by the internal secretion of the testicle. Castration in early age periods prevents growth and development of sex characteristics. Testicular transplants in such infantile castrates lead to normal physical and psychic development. The production of this physiological testicular hormone takes place in the so-called interstitial tissue (Leydig's cells) and not in seminal canals which serve for the production of spermatozoa.
QuoteThrough transplantation of ovaries into infantile castrated guinea-pigs the female sex characteristics, physical and psychic, are brought to development (feminization). This includes particularly the development of the mammary gland and nipples, milk secretion, willingness to give suck, feminine direction of the sex instinct and skeletal form, hirsute character and type, and deposition of adipose tissue of female type. Simultaneously, male characteristics are extensively inhibited.
QuoteTesticular transplants in infantile spayed female guinea-pigs bring about development of masculine Anlagen (masculization): development of the male organ, masculine sex instinct, skeleton, and pilosity.
Simultaneous transplantation of testicle and ovary into infantile guinea-pig castrates effects the development of masculine and feminine sex characteristics (experimental hermaphroditism).
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talk:Eugen_Steinach (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talk:Eugen_Steinach)
Oh, and by all means, please do not hesitate to comment on this. ;)
Like who you like and be happy :D
Thank you for going back on topic! the guinea-pigs weren't really helping my case! lol! anyways but its just wierd how all of a sudden I like guys! i have never even related with them.
Quote from: MyAlias on December 31, 2011, 12:47:45 PM
Thank you for going back on topic! the guinea-pigs weren't really helping my case! lol! anyways but its just wierd how all of a sudden I like guys! i have never even related with them.
Kia Ora MA,
::) Are you happy with this change ?
Metta Zenda :)
Quote from: Zenda on December 31, 2011, 06:17:53 PM
Kia Ora MA,
::) Are you happy with this change ?
Metta Zenda :)
That's just it, I don't know. I haven't been with a guy before or yet! I'm just confused at the moment!
Quote from: Zenda on December 31, 2011, 06:17:53 PM
Kia Ora MA,
::) Are you happy with this change ?
Metta Zenda :)
Quote from: MyAlias on December 31, 2011, 08:15:45 PM
That's just it, I don't know. I haven't been with a guy before or yet! I'm just confused at the moment!
Then just let it be for now, and you might experience a moment where you are at peace with whatever direction your orientation takes! :)
Quote from: Herwinteress on December 30, 2011, 04:52:27 PM
Sign me up for the HETERO women line.
Far as my own experience, before coming out I always had this 'weird vibe' about men and never considered it to be a sexual attraction. I was so hell-bent on being a regular guy I tried to just force it out of my mind on why I would steal glances at some guys and freak out/get butterflies other times when I was close enough to smell them (?) or have a great conversation/friendship intamcy with some and think to myself 'this is really nice' but shouldn't feel this way...
As a caveat, I haven't begun HRT yet so maybe that will throw me for an unexpected loop.
BUT as I have at least started the process of being comfortable feeling and expressing myself as a woman, I'm totally OK with being completely man-hungry.
Same here, look to starting HRT in January, but for the last 6 months I've been at peace with myself over being a "HETRO WOMAN" also. Don't know if it is all due to acceptance of being Trans, or if it is due to my own E & T levels changing or a combo of both?
Have to wait and see what HRT adds to this...
Before I started HRT, I'd have sworn I was a hetero woman.. After all I'd spent years chasing men as a gay guy.. After a few months on HRT I realised that I really had no particular preference.. I got one of the silliest responses out of my therapist when I asked about it too.. He said 'It happens..'
Quote from: kelly_aus on December 31, 2011, 11:29:06 PM
Before I started HRT, I'd have sworn I was a hetero woman.. After all I'd spent years chasing men as a gay guy.. After a few months on HRT I realised that I really had no particular preference.. I got one of the silliest responses out of my therapist when I asked about it too.. He said 'It happens..'
"It happens" is the wisest explanation I've ever gotten for anything in life. ;D
Quote from: Mahsa the disco shark on December 29, 2011, 09:35:14 PM
You might have always been into men and your transition is merely justification for that.
I can't argue this never happens, but it is very much exactly the knee-jerk claim the average ignorant religionist throws out so it's very suspect to me.
Quote from: Herwinteress on December 30, 2011, 04:52:27 PM
Sign me up for the HETERO women line.
Far as my own experience, before coming out I always had this 'weird vibe' about men and never considered it to be a sexual attraction. I was so hell-bent on being a regular guy I tried to just force it out of my mind on why I would steal glances at some guys and freak out/get butterflies other times when I was close enough to smell them (?) or have a great conversation/friendship intamcy with some and think to myself 'this is really nice' but shouldn't feel this way...
As a caveat, I haven't begun HRT yet so maybe that will throw me for an unexpected loop.
BUT as I have at least started the process of being comfortable feeling and expressing myself as a woman, I'm totally OK with being completely man-hungry.
And awesome thread you've started MsDazzler. I will be carefully and thoroughly reviewing all entries - for ahem, scientific purposes of course, ahem - before making my own recommendations. :o
I've always kind of understood myself in an if/then manner.
I think a lot of us, probably most all, if we resist this condition go through a period in which we ask "Am I just gay? is that what it is?"
I did, but I can safely say i wasn't. Even to this very hour, if i close my eyes and imagine a man-on-man encounter, romantic or sexual, I have a visceral "do NOT like" reaction. don't get me wrong, i have gay friends i love and am all for the rights of all gay people but the idea i'd ever be on either end of a gay relationship as a male was always very firmly "NO WAY" was i interested.
On the other hand, going back to my teen years, if i imagined the girl i believe I should have been - what was her life to be like? - I've always instinctively understood that THAT girl was not only into guys, but very promiscuously so. the female i know myself to be has always been into guys.
But I still don't precisely feel a sexual attraction in the same sense that I've been attracted to females as a male, i'm not so much (yet) attracted to hard bodies or body hair or whatever, but I'm attracted to masculinity. My understanding of who i am as a person is to be some guys best girl, to be the perused and romanced and seduced and yes even dominated.
there's a lot of discussion in trans circles of the "loss of male privilege" and how women are seen as "lesser" in some way...and while it might not be any sort of politically correct to say, THAT is what i feel rewarded by, it my "place in the world"
I've experimented with men enough to know that i love love love being a woman to a man. Even though right now I'm trying to provide a soft landing to the woman I'm married to.
Ultimately, I can only consider myself bi in that i can still perform and enjoy it with a female on occasion, but I'm very sure that when this relationship ends, there will almost certainly never be another romantic relationship with a female.
Quote from: MsDazzler on December 30, 2011, 07:44:57 PM
thanks but it is not my thread :)
but since you identify as hetero, get your ass in my other thread "post your idea of the perfect guy!" and contribute! :)
can you link it? the search function seems on the fritz
Quote from: Tammy Hope on January 01, 2012, 12:42:46 AM
can you link it? the search function seems on the fritz
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,113051.0/topicseen.html (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,113051.0/topicseen.html)
Quote from: Felix on January 01, 2012, 12:54:05 AM
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,113051.0/topicseen.html (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,113051.0/topicseen.html)
yeah, turned out to be on the first page, duh!
I think a lot of it too has to do with pheromones. Because I have, and I say this awkwardly, had the same experience. And it really messed with my mind. But it only happened 8 months or so into HRT for me.
Anyway, there's this guy at work that I suddenly found really hot! Tall, blonde, and has piercing blue eyes. I know I go all stupid around him like a school girl. And my sisters both laughed when I told them how conflicted I was. They simply said, " relax. You're a girl now. ". But it still kind of bothers me that something like that was not a subtle change. It's just taken me a while to accept that this is Just another aspect of myself. But I still love being with my wife. So it just made me Bi.
I've not started HRT yet but i've noticed a big change since coming out.
Before I came out I saw men I thought were nice & had been with several men but couldn't see myself in a relationship with one, now that i'm out I see men in a different light, a fit male body is the most erotic thing in the world, I don't even need to see his package to think this now & I often find myself catching the scent of a man & getting some pretty intense thoughts about what i'd like to do with him.
I'm sure it's a case of being in denial before but now my secrets out my sub concience has given itself the green light to find men truly attractive
I have been giving this topic some thought and really can't come up with anything conclusive, other than than if you love someone, and they love you, who cares what their sex is.
If you are fortunate enough to have a partner who has stayed through transition, then you have found an absolute angel, and would be insane to leave them for any reason. Personally I can't envisage an emotional relationship with a man, but no doubt post-SRS I will give sex a try sometime, just to see what it is like.
Liking men is one thing but understanding them? I never did even when I was trying to be one. Probably why I was so bad at it!
Karen.
Quote from: justmeinoz on January 01, 2012, 05:49:48 AM
Liking men is one thing but understanding them? I never did even when I was trying to be one. Probably why I was so bad at it!
Karen.
Hear! Hear! I never could quite get the hang of masculinity either.
However, now that I'm on the other side of the fence, I truly believe this is more appropriate. At least from my point of view...
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm1.static.flickr.com%2F195%2F473739183_5c99733c4b.jpg&hash=5acb89c3b1e17dc23349aa57d81e63e5f2c3fbbc)
-Sandy(I like having a lot of buttons and knobs!)
I don't see what the big spectacle is all about - roll with the changes
you just need to get laid by a stud instead of agonizing over it here, IMHO
then you ll know
Kia Ora MA,
::) As Ms Daz said, "You won't know for sure until you try !" You might find your 'fantasy' is not your reality...
Metta Zenda :)
Quote from: MsDazzler on January 01, 2012, 01:53:24 PM
I don't see what the big spectacle is all about - roll with the changes
you just need to get laid by a stud instead of agonizing over it here, IMHO
then you ll know
Question is, if this was not the best post ever in this thread. :laugh:
Quote from: Sandy on January 01, 2012, 08:17:02 AM
Hear! Hear! I never could quite get the hang of masculinity either.
However, now that I'm on the other side of the fence, I truly believe this is more appropriate. At least from my point of view...
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm1.static.flickr.com%2F195%2F473739183_5c99733c4b.jpg&hash=5acb89c3b1e17dc23349aa57d81e63e5f2c3fbbc)
-Sandy(I like having a lot of buttons and knobs!)
I love this! this is great! I like having lots of buttons and knobs too! lol
Quote from: SandraJane on December 31, 2011, 08:46:44 PM
Then just let it be for now, and you might experience a moment where you are at peace with whatever direction your orientation takes! :)
I Have to wait and see what HRT adds to this...
I can't just let it be, I have these urges inside! I am trying to be at peace! I am not on HRT either, that's why its weird!
Quote from: Keaira on January 01, 2012, 01:25:48 AM
And it really messed with my mind. But it only happened 8 months or so into HRT for me.
Anyway, there's this guy at work that I suddenly found really hot! I know I go all stupid around him like a school girl. But it still kind of bothers me that something like that was not a subtle change.
I know this feeling, that's how I get! but its that "not a subtle change" thing that's getting to me!
Quote from: MsDazzler on January 01, 2012, 01:53:24 PM
I don't see what the big spectacle is all about - roll with the changes
you just need to get laid by a stud instead of agonizing over it here, IMHO
then you ll know
yes simple! but I am not that type of girl! I cant just sleep with anybody........... or maybe I just don't want to be that kind of girl!
Quote from: Zenda on January 01, 2012, 02:41:00 PM
Kia Ora MA,
::) As Ms Daz said, "You won't know for sure until you try !" You might find your 'fantasy' is not your reality...
Metta Zenda :)
that's what I am afraid of, what if my fantasy is not my reality? I don't want to feel the guilt, shame and dirtiness that comes after.
Quote from: MyAlias on January 01, 2012, 03:40:58 PM
yes simple! but I am not that type of girl! I cant just sleep with anybody........... or maybe I just don't want to be that kind of girl!
If you are still presenting as a male, just go to a gay bar and get drunk then go home with a man. :)
If you are presenting as a female, just go to a straight bar and get drunk then go home with a man. :)
Quote from: MyAlias on January 01, 2012, 03:40:58 PM
that's what I am afraid of, what if my fantasy is not my reality? I don't want to feel the guilt, shame and dirtiness that comes after.
Oh come on, it is transparent that you are afraid of taking the leap and looking to us for encouragement, heh, not because you are worrying about the aftermath. lol
Quote from: MyAlias on January 01, 2012, 03:40:58 PM
...
I can't just let it be, I have these urges inside! I am trying to be at peace! I am not on HRT either, that's why its weird!
...
I know this feeling, that's how I get! but its that "not a subtle change" thing that's getting to me!
...
yes simple! but I am not that type of girl! I cant just sleep with anybody........... or maybe I just don't want to be that kind of girl!
...
that's what I am afraid of, what if my fantasy is not my reality? I don't want to feel the guilt, shame and dirtiness that comes after.
Calm thyself :) Don't fret over this. New emotions can be erratic and take time to pick apart and understand. Urges may exist, but as you've said, acting upon those urges could be regretful. You're too early on in this new discovery, I feel, to be acting on anything. Take time to try and understand it and explore it [from the sidelines]. Most importantly, again, relax. It's okay.
Quote from: MyAlias on January 01, 2012, 03:40:58 PM
that's what I am afraid of, what if my fantasy is not my reality? I don't want to feel the guilt, shame and dirtiness that comes after.
Kia Ora MA,
::) Happy Girl[The Scottish one] posted this video clip...It pin points your predicament and offers a solution...
No Fear in the Now (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZUdHX1Bent0#)
Metta Zenda :)
Quote from: ~Amy~ on January 01, 2012, 03:50:38 PM
Calm thyself :) Don't fret over this. New emotions can be erratic and take time to pick apart and understand. Urges may exist, but as you've said, acting upon those urges could be regretful. You're too early on in this new discovery, I feel, to be acting on anything. Take time to try and understand it and explore it [from the sidelines]. Most importantly, again, relax. It's okay.
Heh... life is too short to proceed with caution :D
Quote from: MsDazzler on January 01, 2012, 04:06:43 PM
Heh... life is too short to proceed with caution :D
And it can be shorter if you don't...
Quote from: SandraJane on January 01, 2012, 05:12:40 PM
And it can be shorter if you don't...
Nothing ventured, nothing gained :D
Quote from: MsDazzler on January 01, 2012, 05:26:33 PM
Nothing ventured, nothing gained :D
Famous last words... :icon_burn:
I've noticed a change in my sexual orientation too. Before transitioning I was attracted to men and now i'm not attracted to either sex's!
Maybe because I have more important things to worry about, idk. :D
Quote from: SandraJane on January 01, 2012, 05:37:11 PM
Famous last words... :icon_burn:
Or they could be words of wisdom to impart to the next gen :D
Well, this sounds kinda scary - to take hormones (or not take hormones) and find that one can go from liking women, to liking men... I feel there is a certain amount of 'ick' factor involved, here. For those of you who are not bothered by it - fine!
Quote from: MsDazzler on January 01, 2012, 05:48:37 PM
Or they could be words of wisdom to impart to the next gen :D
And here you were frettin' about being a Cougar! :laugh:
Kia Ora,
::) My apologies to Ms Dazzler [ regarding my posting of a video clip for others to 'listen' to if they so choose]... So I would like to make amends... In a nutshell what Sadhguru [the Indian guy in the clip]is saying is this "Most peoples existence is solely rooted in what comes next[a fantasy, an illusion], not what is right now[reality]!"
::) So the OP 'fears' regarding her shift in sexual orientation are based upon an illusion, on something that has not happened, and he calls this a form of insanity[ of which I tend to agree]...
Metta Zenda :)
Quote from: Suziack on January 01, 2012, 07:39:03 PM
Well, this sounds kinda scary - to take hormones (or not take hormones) and find that one can go from liking women, to liking men... I feel there is a certain amount of 'ick' factor involved, here. For those of you who are not bothered by it - fine!
What about transsexual lesbians who hook up with other transsexual women... I mean is liking men that much of a stretch?
Quote from: Zenda on January 01, 2012, 08:49:18 PM
Kia Ora,
::) My apologies to Ms Dazzler [ regarding my posting of a video clip for others to 'listen' to if they so choose]... So I would like to make amends... In a nutshell what Sadhguru [the Indian guy in the clip]is saying is this "Most peoples existence is solely rooted in what comes next[a fantasy, an illusion], not what is right now[reality]!"
::) So the OP 'fears' regarding her shift in sexual orientation are based upon an illusion, on something that has not happened, and he calls this a form of insanity[ of which I tend to agree]...
Metta Zenda :)
Thanks for the apology :) I usually ignore youtube links if they have no captioning. Unfortunately Google's closed captioning based on voice recognition software still sucks, heh.
That is what I am saying - the OP comes here and post about her fear of change in sexual orientation, and what's the big deal with it ? Life goes on. Hell, gender transition is even huger than sexual orientation change, heh.
Quote from: MsDazzler on January 01, 2012, 10:02:55 PM
Thanks for the apology :) I usually ignore youtube links if they have no captioning. Unfortunately Google's closed captioning based on voice recognition software still sucks, heh.
"That is what I am saying - the OP comes here and post about her fear of change in sexual orientation, and what's the big deal with it ? Life goes on. Hell, gender transition is even huger than sexual orientation change, heh !"
Kia Ora Ms Daz,
::) You're welcome!
::)
In a round about kinda way I think you're on the same page as Sadhguru ... :icon_yes:
Metta Zenda :)
Does this mean that the sexual orientation is not inborn and it can change over life? As far as I understand it it is inborn and therefore cannot be modified.
Quote from: Mahsa the disco shark on January 01, 2012, 09:09:02 PM
What about transsexual lesbians who hook up with other transsexual women... I mean is liking men that much of a stretch?
What about me? ;D
I don't know if liking mtfs is a shift caused by hrt, like what others are describing, but I didn't know I had the attraction until I met one in person.
I don't have any feeling toward cis men though. I'd be open to that feeling if it happened, but it's not an attraction I've felt yet.
Quote from: Lily on January 01, 2012, 10:19:45 PM
What about me? ;D
I don't know if liking mtfs is a shift caused by hrt, like what others are describing, but I didn't know I had the attraction until I met one in person.
I don't have any feeling toward cis men though. I'd be open to that feeling if it happened, but it's not an attraction I've felt yet.
No, but that other mtf has the experiences of a male and thus the relationship is "gay"(as in homosexual) on some level... Not like a cisfemale. If and when I do go "lez" I hook up with cisfemales... Why would I want a variation of what I previously had as a gay male?
Quote from: Zenda on January 01, 2012, 10:15:50 PM
Kia Ora Ms Daz,
::) You're welcome!
::) In a round about kinda way I think you're on the same page as Sadhguru ... :icon_yes:
Metta Zenda :)
Who is Sadhguru?
Quote from: MyAlias on December 29, 2011, 09:34:39 PM
I have always liked women. But since I have come out I seem to be becoming more and more attrated to men? Will I stop liking women? Why the change. I have never found men attractive till now! ???
Several other transwomen and I went through the same thing. While we can be in denial of our gender identity, we can also be in denial about our sexuality. Onc you accepted that you were a woman, you grew to accept that you were a straight woman.
Quote from: xXRebeccaXx on January 02, 2012, 12:59:39 AM
Several other transwomen and I went through the same thing. While we can be in denial of our gender identity, we can also be in denial about our sexuality. Onc you accepted that you were a woman, you grew to accept that you were a straight woman.
That!
Quote from: Mahsa the disco shark on January 01, 2012, 11:45:42 PM
No, but that other mtf has the experiences of a male and thus the relationship is "gay"(as in homosexual) on some level... Not like a cisfemale. If and when I do go "lez" I hook up with cisfemales... Why would I want a variation of what I previously had as a gay male?
Because for me it's a wonderful feeling to be close to someone who understands my biggest issue so perfectly?
Aside from that one thing, I don't see any difference between dating mtfs and cis girls. It all comes down to personality and compatibility. Why would I care how the person was born? I care about the now, and about the future.
Quote from: Lily on January 02, 2012, 01:14:21 PM
Because for me it's a wonderful feeling to be close to someone who understands my biggest issue so perfectly?
Aside from that one thing, I don't see any difference between dating mtfs and cis girls. It all comes down to personality and compatibility. Why would I care how the person was born? I care about the now, and about the future.
Plus, just because someone technically is a "MTF", that do not mean that the person necessarily have any experience of a male life, other then having been assigned as Male at birth.
Many MTF's transitions very young, and especially nowadays, when some even transitions at age 6 or 7, such as"Jazz", an MTF that are now 11 and have lived as a girl since four or five years.
She have never been a male, regardless of the set of genitals she were born with, so the only way a relationship later on with her would be homosexual, would be if she ended up with a girl.
As for why some people specifically prefers MTF's, it could be anything. Some do it because of the genitals excludignly, or, so called "->-bleeped-<-s", while others got the hots for MTF's because they, as they often describes it, are "more female than bio-females". In short, because they are attracted to femininity and thinks that MTF's(Whether pre or post-op, as this type do not care about the genital set) have an extra amount of that.
While yet others are attracted to the concept; That the T-person had such a strong self-awareness, identity and guts that they took the step to modify the body to match those.
Only the specific person that is attracted to T-persons knows why, as every such one have their own reason.
I am adding the following interview with 'Jazz'. :)
Rosie, Jazz, Chaz (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tYTJ7kL-Sss#)
That! ;)
Quote from: MsDazzler on January 01, 2012, 03:46:17 PM
Plan 1: If you are still presenting as a male, just go to a gay bar and get drunk then go home with a man. :)
plan 2: If you are presenting as a female, just go to a straight bar and get drunk then go home with a man. :)
Oh come on, it is transparent that you are afraid of taking the leap and looking to us for encouragement, heh, not because you are worrying about the aftermath. lol
yes i am presenting female part time right now, but didnt i just say, I didn't want to be that kind of girl! plan two is asking to get beat up or worse by the way!
Yes I am afraid of taking a leap, I do really want to try this sometimes. but I am not looking for encouragement, and yes I am worried about the aftermath, I am not the kind of person that could just fall into anybodys bed! I am already suffering from deppression and dysphoria about myself and my body I don't want to add more problems!
Quote from: ~Amy~ on January 01, 2012, 03:50:38 PM
Calm thyself :) Don't fret over this. New emotions can be erratic and take time to pick apart and understand. Urges may exist, but as you've said, acting upon those urges could be regretful. You're too early on in this new discovery, I feel, to be acting on anything. Take time to try and understand it and explore it [from the sidelines]. Most importantly, again, relax. It's okay.
Thank you Amy, This is great advise! I don't want to be regretful! I am trying to relax.
Quote from: MsDazzler on January 01, 2012, 04:06:43 PM
Heh... life is too short to proceed with caution :D
for you maybe!
Quote from: SandraJane on January 01, 2012, 05:12:40 PM
And it can be shorter if you don't...
true! STD's etc etc..
Quote from: Suziack on January 01, 2012, 07:39:03 PM
Well, this sounds kinda scary - to take hormones (or not take hormones) and find that one can go from liking women, to liking men... I feel there is a certain amount of 'ick' factor involved, here. For those of you who are not bothered by it - fine!
I am not even on hormones yet and this is happening!
Quote from: Mahsa the disco shark on January 01, 2012, 09:09:02 PM
What about transsexual lesbians who hook up with other transsexual women... I mean is liking men that much of a stretch?
I believ so yes! it is a far stretch to me! an MTF is a girl just like me!
Quote from: MsDazzler on January 01, 2012, 10:02:55 PM
That is what I am saying - the OP comes here and post about her fear of change in sexual orientation, and what's the big deal with it ? Life goes on. Hell, gender transition is even huger than sexual orientation change, heh.
Its a big deal! I want to know why!
Quote from: Lily on January 01, 2012, 10:19:45 PM
What about me? ;D
I don't know if liking mtfs is a shift caused by hrt, like what others are describing, but I didn't know I had the attraction until I met one in person.
I don't have any feeling toward cis men though. I'd be open to that feeling if it happened, but it's not an attraction I've felt yet.
I think your fine! I have always found MTF's attractive! Because I have always found women attractive, they are women after all!
Quote from: xXRebeccaXx on January 02, 2012, 12:59:39 AM
Several other transwomen and I went through the same thing. While we can be in denial of our gender identity, we can also be in denial about our sexuality. Onc you accepted that you were a woman, you grew to accept that you were a straight woman.
Thank you for this reply, this makes some sense to me! so your saying since I accepted I am female, my mind has acepted that i can be a straight female?
Quote from: Lily on January 02, 2012, 01:14:21 PM
Because for me it's a wonderful feeling to be close to someone who understands my biggest issue so perfectly?
Aside from that one thing, I don't see any difference between dating mtfs and cis girls. It all comes down to personality and compatibility. Why would I care how the person was born? I care about the now, and about the future.
I totally agree with you!
Quote from: MyAlias on January 02, 2012, 07:46:04 PM
Thank you for this reply, this makes some sense to me! so your saying since I accepted I am female, my mind has acepted that i can be a straight female?
Basically yes, but you might be bi =P
ok, so I was thinking about the Bi thing! I can't see myself having a relationship with a man only a woman. I am just curious for now I guess.
So I am still curious! But I have found that I seem to be into girly emo twink type guys.
something odd.
my wife, who goes back and forth between emotional blackmail/badgering and trying to be so sexy/romantic/needy that i'm seduced into "going back" tried the latter tactic the other morning.
she offered the very rare effort at oral sex and the even rarer (as in, once a year maybe?) opportunity to reciprocate (which she used to enjoy me doing a lot back in our younger days)
the funny thing was, i found performing oral on her not at all enjoyable and mildly unpleasant. This contrasting with my few experiments at performing oral on a guy and really enjoying it.
is it possible to be interested in guys in the bed and not particularly anywhere else?
I'm not sure that's the case - I haven't had a chance to be "courted" by a guy in any real sense. I have a feeling my feelings about looking at men as attractive all over, and not just sexually, only suffers from a lack of experience with it.
Quote from: Tammy Hope on March 11, 2012, 03:54:06 AM
is it possible to be interested in guys in the bed and not particularly anywhere else?
Yes. I'm interested in EVERYONE in the bed but only guys in relationships. So far.
I have been thinking about this quite a bit lately.
I knew I was trans from about 4 years old. I have heard many homosexuals say they knew at a very young age as well.
I had no preference in male or female until puberty hit and girls started to become even more interesting to me than they were when I was younger.
As I come out to more people, I have a changing opinion of men, but I am still much more attracted to women.
I suspect hormones play a role but I also suspect most people are at least a little bit bi.
I think accepting that you're trans opens the door and you start to wonder if you were in denial about your sexuality too.
Quote from: Danielle×o on March 12, 2012, 02:20:37 AM
I think accepting that you're trans opens the door and you start to wonder if you were in denial about your sexuality too.
not in my case.
From the beginning I openly considered the possibility of being gay, it's just not in me. At least not guy/guy gay.
my sexual fantasies always revoked around male-female sex, and either with me in the female role, or me as an outside observer of some other female in the act. I TRIED to fantasize about a guy/guy encounter and it left me completely cold.
I might be bi on some level, but not as a male.
Me personally, I don't care if it's me being a "guy" or whatever. I just fantasize about having sex with a guy, and me being the bottom or having a vagina. How I present has absolutely no influence on what I like sexually.
I have always looked at a vagina as "eh, so what?" until I think it's trying to get me, then I go "omg ew". The influence of hormones on my body has made me notice men so much more. It's also made me care far more about what they say, and it's easier for people to ruin the mood. Pre HRT, sex would be like a way of getting over an argument, now arguments get in the way of sex.
Quote from: Tammy Hope on March 12, 2012, 11:16:19 PM
...
I might be bi on some level, but not as a male.
I concur here. I've absolutely no interests in men, sexually, while I am stuck in male body (..or well, genitals to be more precise). I can look at them, comment on their looks. Even be visually attracted, but I'd never go for sex. Which is kinda weird, because I could care less what other people are doing, but doing it personally more or less disgusts me. And on the other hand, I'd love to play the female part during it. Male part just doesen't really suit me. At all.
So I always thought that I was heterosexual, even though I've always kept an eye out for men as well. After finding wonderful transworld I did some soulsearching and realised things.
So though this has been answered to op many times by now, I'll play the record one more time, maybe it's your subconcious realising things. You've, subconciously, thought that you shouldn't have sex with male because you were same gender. Now that your subconcious is accepting that you are not same gender it accepts it. I doubdt that you stop liking women though, but I suppose you never know. Personally I'm wondering the same thing, as I'm pre-HRT. Hormones itself shouldn't change it, but mind is powerful. After all, greatest attraction towards women from me has always been their hair and overall style. Maybe they have been because I've wanted to mimic it? Or maybe I'm genuinely bisexual. Or something.
I can only speak for myself but I have never had a problem getting past the fourth date with a transgender girl. The girl inside is
more important then the exterior. It is sad that more men don't see the inner beauty of all girls.
I know this is old but here is my thought.
Socrates how was gay once said that if all people were raised "gender Neutral' 50% would be bisexual.
What I believe is that about 50% are gender neutral "what sex they find attractive" It is the gender training that pushes them in the direction of preferring the opposite gender. It is our society that forbids us being gender neutral. So if you change gender male to female some will come out. It is not necessarily the female hormones and anti male hormones that does it. Many are on hormones for a long time and it is not untill they live as women that they find men attractive, or at least they are not turned off so much!. But with some just taking female hormones they find they are "checking out men" to their surprise. This does not mean you were gay as a man and did not know it. Also and this is my thought "It is natural to want to be normal" So as a man you find women attractive then suddenly as a women you find men attractive, as well as women. For me I just would find it "wrong" to be a lesbian but I do not find men attractive. If I suddenly found myself as a women I would not doubt date men even have sex but cannot see myself wanting to be with one. I doubt i would find their body's a turn on.
I have read many a posts of transgender women suddenly finding themselves attracted to me after starting hormones and living as women. Personalty I think it is the brain readjusting gender thoughts to your new body.