I have a bit of a problem/awkward situation coming up, and I'm curious on what some of you guys might do
So, I ride horses (English). You need riding breeches, and mine are pretty worn out/falling apart, so time to buy a new pair! Now, I personally want to get women's breeches, for various reasons. The asthetic differences are minimal, and while the mens afford crotch room, I'm not out at the stable and so won't be needing that for a packer. One major difference is, where I live, there are almost no mens breeches to be gotten, but lots of women's ones. The selection will be greater and I would like that, given I wear these 3-4 times a week at minimum.

I will be going shopping alone, barring a miracle, and I tend to pass 95% of the time, especially when out on my own, albiet as fairly young; 14-16 ish. This is a bit of an irrational fear, but how would I deal with being told 'this is the women's breeches', and then, furthermore, having to try them on - they're not cheap and it's rare I can make the trip to get them, so I will. All I can think of is saying something like "I know they are. That's what I want." But that seems very weird and awkward to me. The last time I bought breeches, I was with family and yet to have a pair-cut or pass in any way, so I can't base it off anything. Any ideas or is that pretty much it?


tl;dr - I need to buy women's clothes. I pass as male. I will need to try them on, too. This is awkward. Any tips?

I don't think anyone will tell you anything. It certainly is not their business what your clothing choice is. And if someone says something, tell them exactly that.

Tell them the woman's versions fit better on you and are more comfortable.

Well I looked at these. Not much difference and if there are more women's and so on, go to it. As for buying across departments, never understood the whole "gendered try on area thing". I go to a few thrift stores and they all contain about 3-6 try on stalls in a central location in the store. The world doesn't seem to fall apart and everyone behaves themselves.

However, if I go to a regular store I just have the parallel problem. I don't pass so that I go and try things on in a stall in the women's dept. even if I have to cross the store to get there. I have never been questioned shopping in the men's area or told such and such is a men's item. If I ever were questioned, I'd just coldly stare at them or give them a blank stare.   I really don't know, as I just doubt I'd be questioned.


BTW, if you find a brand that you like, before they change the model, you could go online and buy a few. I hate when they change the model, they do this with shoes all the time.


--Jay

You pick them up, you go to a change room, you try them on.

If they fit you, buy them.

For years before I transitioned I bought 'female' jeans because they fitted me and men's didn't. I was small for a male, the smallest men's size were far too big.  No one was in the least surprised, even when I was trying to be ultra male.


Shops don't care, a sale is a sale, and I would think that for specialist pants they would care even less.

Just be confident and do it.

I have a few clothes who are considered for woman, but I dont really get comments for it, once I where told "this is for woman" I said. oh yeah sure. there they make money so they just want you to buy something whatever it for men or women.

You could always pick up a pair of mens for when you go to try them on as well as the women's, and then when you go to pay just say they're for your girlfriend/wife/sister etc and the mens didn't fit you right so you won't be buying those if you didn't want to admit they're for you.

I don't know how much you ride or whether you compete or not, but I've not owned any jodhpurs or anything designed for riding for years. I've always been okay wearing whatever I'm normally in as long as they're not tight jeans or shorts. We have icelandic horses though so the saddles are a little different (cut straighter in the leg and deeper seat) and we don't trot as much because of their extra gait.

I've tried to think myself to death about all the possible questions someone would ask and come up with responses too. In uniform, I walked onto the BX on base and proceeded to buy a whole bunch of stuff that didn't fit my projected gender. I didn't need any of my answers because nobody said anything. Don't overthink it.

I have a straight cis male friend who only buys female sneakers. He says the men's shoes are too plain. When making a purchase if the store clerk says anything (most of the time they don't) he just says he prefers the styling...and the clerk says "ok" and makes the sale. I don't think a clerk would say anything to be hateful. They're just wanting to make sure you haven't accidentally picked up the wrong item.

I know sometimes things can seem uncomfortable but just think how many times you'll probably see that clerk again in your life? Maybe a handful of times and that is if you shop there often. Who gives a rat's patootie what they think really?

Thanks for all the stories and support guys & gals. =] Nice to know I'm not alone in these, though I wil probably be approached due to how old I look. Ah well. I'll just go in and do it, screw the awkward. It seems I'm making a mountain out of a molehill, so I'll try not to. xD

@ Alex: I'm at a level where if I tried to ride in say, sweatpants, I would be sent out to change, though I don't formally compete. I would like to say, though, that Icelantic horses are absolutley adorable.

I have found that most of the things I fear are not as bad as I feared, in fact many times my fear is totally baseless.   I now shop exclusively for women's clothing and I really notice anybody giving me a second thought.   The other day I took four bras in Walmart to try out at the dressing rooms.   The lady attendant just showed me to a dressing room where I tried them on.   Unfortunately all of the straps were too short to go around me and I had to take them back.   Just act like you belong there and soon you shall.   Most people are worried so much about their own lives that they are not paying attention to you.   If some one does have a reaction, its their problem, not yours.

I would probably try to go in with the attitude that you're looking to buy today (the day you go to the store) and that you have a vague idea of what fits you best. You might be able to tell a sales person that although you're a young guy, you prefer women's breeches because they fit your body better. Don't really need to go into details or anything, just say you like the fit better.