Today 2/13/2013 at 1:13 am the kindest, most loving and honest person I have ever and will ever know passed on from this life.
Mom, I will always love you and will miss you more than you can imagine. You were always there for me, from giving me guidance when I was young and making tons of mistakes to when I need someone to help by talking with me during bouts of depression.
You always knew what to say and you supported me in ways most people will never understand. I will never forget all of the time we had together and I am thankful I had an extra two and a half years to be with you. You and I grew even closer after your transplant and when I was your caretaker and those will always be some of my best memories. You were the first person to know I was "gay" and the first I ever talked to about being Trans. You have been the rock in my life whom I could always rely upon, and I dont know who to call anymore. I know I will never wake up to your calls again, asking me to go out and eat or shop. I will never be able to see you when I am depressed. I do not know how to carry on without you but I will try. Knowing you will never call me again and just stay hi and to tell me you love me is one of the worst thoughts I can imagine. I have laid in my room for the last few hours listening to your voicemails from the last two years, just to hear those words. I have been crying since I was told by your doctors "all we can do is make (you) comfortable.", and I cannot stop crying...I'll always love you Mem. There is so much more I want to say, but I do not see the point, I know you are gone...and that hurts more than anything ever will. I wish I were the one gone and not you, I wish I could have endured the pain and suffering for you so you would never have to know that feeling. You were kind to everyone and made everyone who knew you more loving and accepting just for knowing you. I have to go now so I can sleep and plan your funeral with the rest of the family tomorrow. I love you Mem, and that will never go away.
Love, Gen