Quote from: Sky-Blue on February 13, 2013, 03:04:39 PM
I guess some of us just don't make the leap at all.

Don't despair, sometimes the run up takes a bit of time. Start to plan bits and pieces, ideas, what do you need to escape. What do you have to learn to be independent? How do you strengthen your spirit?

You can do it. WE all know that, because we look from the other side, but it does not make it any easier for you, you still have to face the fears, and that is what they are; fears. Not many of them will end up being real and not many cannot be overcome, and not many will ever come about, but the fear of them takes a toll and we learn to think our way through them.

Yes it is a bit easy to say, we have done, go for it. But the comments are meant as support not a suggestion of inability or not understanding your concerns at this time.

I think most of us made the jump when there was no alternative. We had reached the edge and that was it.

Take care and don't despair, lets plan bit by bit, step by step.

Cindy

Quote from: Sky-Blue on February 13, 2013, 06:48:28 AM
Prove it. Because at this point I haven't seen any redeeming qualities in humanity when it comes to bigotry and othering towards people who don't follow social norms.

I live in hick-town population 11,000.

(Sorry for sounding so negative, but I need someplace where I don't have to glue a smile onto my face.)

Hicker town in hillbilly country

Keyser is a city in and the county seat of Mineral County[6], West Virginia, United States. It is part of the Cumberland, MD-WV Metropolitan Statistical Area. The population was 5,439 at the 2010 census.

Yes, there are and always will be haters out there. My point is 30-40 years there were a lot lot more. It took the ->-bleeped-<-s to throw the first punches at Stonewall. A LOT is  different from how things were in 1969. Attitudes are slowly changing. PC can be a good thing at times.

The only thing I remember hearing that was useful out of my father's mouth is that the world meets nobody halfway. When the ladder is missing, you have to build it yourself.

A lot of people are hiding something and are just as afraid of what people will say or do if anybody finds out. Just because people appear to be phobic all around you, doesn't mean that they all are. There could be people in town that are still closeted, wishing they had the courage to do what you did. I was one of those people in a small religious town about 20 years ago.

Thank you for your help, I'm much better after coming home from work. I actually managed to keep myself from pretending to be masculine (at work), although its going to be difficult to do the same in front of my family. Me and my dad went out to a restaurant and he tried to relate to what I'm going through. He told me, "I can give you advice about depression and such, but I can't give you help for the things that you are going through that I never had to deal with"; effectively concluding with, "Do whatever makes you happy". I think both my parents are starting to see that I haven't been doing so well (previously they thought it was just a teenage phase).

(Copied and pasted from "I'm probably just crazy...", from "Skye's Blog". Mostly just because I need my sleep d-_-b, otherwise I would have just re-typed it)

-Skye

So glad to hear it, Skye.

Quote from: Sky-Blue on February 12, 2013, 09:35:54 PM
I'm at the point where I don't see myself having a relationship or a close friendship if I don't transition. It's hard to have either when you're pretending to be someone you're not. What's even more difficult is the pretending part. Even if I wanted to go back to college, if I don't transition I won't  be mentally capable of college.

Either I transition and risk being treated as just some f***** up ->-bleeped-<- or I continue to pretend to be normal for the rest of my life. I have the choice of either bad or worse, there is no happy ending, no light at the end of the tunnel. Quite honestly I don't have the support nor the strength to transition.

I am kind of in the same boat as you, only that this issue is consistently bothering me while I am studying at graduate school. I also feel like I could not commit myself to a relationship since they only see me by my man shell along with traditional expectations of a man.