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Do you think people would accept you more if you were straight or gay/lesbian?

Started by EmmaS, February 25, 2013, 05:10:36 PM

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Do you think people would accept you more if you were straight or gay/lesbian?

Straight
Lesbian
They would accept me no matter what
They won't accept me no matter what
Other

EmmaS

I think it's pretty straight forward. I think people in my life would accept me more if I was a lesbian and continued to date women, but I don't think I want to.
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Brooke777

Honestly, I have received more issues from people for me being a lesbian than for me transitioning to be a woman. This includes my parents who thin it is "weird" that I want to date women.
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AlexD

This strikes me as a "damned if you do, damned if you don't" sort of situation. If you're straight, it "explains" why you're trans; if you're gay, then you must be some sort of fool for making dating more difficult for yourself by transitioning. The real problem is that many cis straight people don't have a good understanding of homosexuality or gender, so they're going to have issues with you no matter what you are.
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Trixie

My mother was very accepting of my bisexuality, but not of my trans-ness. I expect the same from others.
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Michelle S.

I actually think it's harder to be a lesbian than straight. Throughout my whole transition so far, the most shocking thing to people - especially my mother - has been that my gf and I are staying together. We have 2 kids together and after 6 years couldn't love each other anymore than we already do yet everybody just thinks that's so " weird".


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AlexD

Quote from: Trixie on February 25, 2013, 05:30:16 PM
My mother was very accepting of my bisexuality, but not of my trans-ness. I expect the same from others.

Heh, same. When I told my mother I thought I was attracted to girls, her reaction was "yeah, I've known since you were 13, whatever"; when I told her I thought I might be a man, she got angry told me to stop being so stupid. ::)

I said in my previous post that many folks don't really understand homosexuality -- I suppose a better way of putting it is that many folks don't understand how it interacts with gender. A lot of people are starting to be quite accepting of homosexuality in itself, which is promising. :)
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Sarah Blomsterhatt

Where I live and with the people around me, friend and family, I really don't think they care if I was straight or gay.

I like girls and I don't care much what people think, I know my family don't care and friends can be chosen.
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Tristan

my dad would no matter what but others in the family are stuck on me being a  proper young lady...
but yeah i tend to be boy crazy
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Kevin Peña

Considering the ignorant comments that go along the lines of "You can't be a girl/boy, you like girls/boys.", I'd guess that people would be more accepting of you if you're straight.  :-\
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AlexD

Quote from: DianaP on February 25, 2013, 05:41:30 PM
Considering the ignorant comments that go along the lines of "You can't be a girl/boy, you like girls/boys.", I'd guess that people would be more accepting of you if you're straight.  :-\

If they tried that line on cis gay people, they'd lose a lot of teeth very quickly.
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Kevin Peña

Quote from: AlexD on February 25, 2013, 05:43:19 PM
If they tried that line on cis gay people, they'd lose a lot of teeth very quickly.

Hey, I'm not defending them. I'm just saying that a lot of people think that sexual orientation = identity, so they'd be more accepting of straight trans people. I'm not saying that they're right, just that they think this.  :-\
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kinz

Quote from: Brooke777 on February 25, 2013, 05:15:27 PM
Honestly, I have received more issues from people for me being a lesbian than for me transitioning to be a woman. This includes my parents who thin it is "weird" that I want to date women.

hahaha, my life.  there's definitely an assumption that trans ladies gotta be straighties, but i still think it's so funny that my parents maybe a little bit think i'm going through a "gay phase".
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Michelle S.

Quote from: DianaP on February 25, 2013, 05:41:30 PM
Considering the ignorant comments that go along the lines of "You can't be a girl/boy, you like girls/boys.", I'd guess that people would be more accepting of you if you're straight.  :-\

That's so true. Reminds me of a conversation I had with my mother once:

Mom: Well what about you and [so], how can you two still "love" each other?

Me: Ummm, easily. She's fine with it and has always been bi.

Mom: What about you though?

Me: What do you mean? I've always dreamed of having a wife and children, never a husband. Just because I'm trans doesn't mean I have to want a husband or boyfriend...

Mom: You just contradicted everything you've told me [I was attempting to come out clearly to her for a 3rd time] and that makes no sense.


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eli77

Quote from: AlexD on February 25, 2013, 05:43:19 PM
If they tried that line on cis gay people, they'd lose a lot of teeth very quickly.

They do use that line. It's just reordered to "You can't like girls/boys, you're a girl/boy."

Which just goes to show how stupid the whole production is.

Anyways, my folks are pretty much accepting of whatever. My dad would prefer me to be straight, but that's cause he thinks me being gay makes my life more difficult, not because he's a jerk. Though I think he's quietly still hoping that I change my mind or something. Oh well.
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Michelle S.

Quote from: muuu on February 25, 2013, 05:50:33 PM
I guess there's the "why transition if you're into girls?" question...

That question is exactly the problem with talking to uninformed people about this. They don't understand that sexuality and gender are totally exclusive of each other. I definitely prefer transgender and never use transsexual. I think too many hear "transsexual" and think it's a genre of porn :/


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Trixie

I just realized that I misunderstood what this thread was about.

No, I don't think it makes a huge difference whether or not I'm straight or gay. I'm bi anyway. The main thing for people is likely to be that I'm trans. It's less accepted.

I don't do well with relationships anyway. There's nothing for people to be upset about if I'm single.  :-\
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Kevin Peña

Quote from: muuu on February 25, 2013, 05:50:33 PM
I wonder how much you can blame it on "sexual" in "transsexual"

I just thought about that. Good point. People tend to forget to break down words. Trans = Change, sexual = Sex, i.e, gender-specific anatomical stuff. Change sex.  :P
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Tristan

Quote from: muuu on February 25, 2013, 05:50:33 PM
I guess there's the "why transition if you're into girls?" question... I wonder how much you can blame it on "sexual" in "transsexual", instead of transgender. Well I don't know, but I think it's a lot easier for people to accept it if there's one less thing that goes against the norm.
i use to wonder this myself but some :Pone did explain it ti me. i must admit it took a few hours to understand.i can be slow at times haha
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AlexD

Quote from: DianaP on February 25, 2013, 05:44:54 PM
Hey, I'm not defending them. I'm just saying that a lot of people think that sexual orientation = identity, so they'd be more accepting of straight trans people. I'm not saying that they're right, just that they think this.  :-\

Oh, I wasn't challenging you, I was agreeing with how stupid the whole thing is.
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Shana

Quote from: DianaP on February 25, 2013, 05:41:30 PM
Considering the ignorant comments that go along the lines of "You can't be a girl/boy, you like girls/boys.", I'd guess that people would be more accepting of you if you're straight.  :-\
I'd have to agree with this, when I told my parents about me being trans, they were dumbfounded about how I could still be attracted to women and ask why I'd want to be a girl then. One of the number one questions I've been asked when I've outed myself is "So you like boys then?" So I'd have to say a majority of the people are more accepting to the idea of being straight than gay/lesbian.
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