Quote from: jamielikesyou on April 18, 2013, 02:30:29 AM
I think passing has a lot to do with poise, confidence, mannerisms, articulation, etc, etc, etc. than simply appearances. Not to discount appearances, but from what I'm told, there is a lot that can and should be done. "Passing," I hope does not mean we all have to supermodel thin, have extensive FFS, etc. I wouldn't use negativity expressed on an internet forum to decide the timing of my decision making process to go part or full time.

I definitely agree, and people also have different ideas of what passing means to them. Some people define passing as being gendered female, while others define it more in the range of being "stealth" to the point where a cis person wouldn't even believe one is trans. I tend to believe it's something in between.

Most of the time, I never seem to care if someone knows I'm trans. But my goal is to eventually have the option to go stealth, and it is really exciting when you experience those moments where someone never even realizes. Actually it's kind of like a drug- I always feel my endorphins rushing when that happens! And yes, I agree it has the most to do with poise, mannerisms, and other extremely subtle factors. Presentation is KEY.. that includes the way you hold yourself and the level of confidence in it that you exhibit throughout each interaction.

I really do think anyone can pass, especially enough to be gendered female by society. There are SO many things one can do to make it happen. Ya just have to want it and know how to acquire the knowledge. Oh hello, Internet! You rock! Thanks for making transition easier for us

It doesn't apply to me but I know that this is a VERY valid point. My bubble burst when I found out that this girl was XX and not XXY as had been told to me before, and was born with ambiguous genitalia. I was raised as a boy, but never fit the role. I have been suicidal, depressed, confused, found it hard to reconcile gender with gender preference, and finally got to a point where I don't care, I just want creative input. I know where you're coming from sister, and you have my love x

Quote from: suzifrommd on April 17, 2013, 07:09:54 PM
May I point out that someone may not know just how fragile they are until their bubble bursts.

Happened to me. I posted a voice recording that got savaged. I figured I could take it until I saw the cascade of negative votes and I went into a funk that lasted weeks. So lets deliver our truth gently.

Hi everyone.

I'd really like to spend today going around "dressed", but I'm scared of how people will react to me. Especially because I'm in an area I'm not too familiar with on business.

So your brutal honesty is expected and appreciated. I know I'm fragile but I'm ready. I know I still need to do a lot of work, but for today, do I look obviously male?




I posted on ->-bleeped-<- and got unclear responses. So, hello again, Susan's.

you'll be fine CP,now get out there and enjoy yourself

Quote from: Caramel Prisoner on April 19, 2013, 03:39:59 AM
Hi everyone.

I'd really like to spend today going around "dressed", but I'm scared of how people will react to me. Especially because I'm in an area I'm not too familiar with on business.

So your brutal honesty is expected and appreciated. I know I'm fragile but I'm ready. I know I still need to do a lot of work, but for today, do I look obviously male?

You look quite bundled up. Where do you live that's so cold to warrant all that at this time of the year?

I don't think you look male in those pictures. You look a bit androgynous, but your presentation is decidedly feminine, so I'd have to give you a probable pass - based on the pictures.

I think some make-up would be a great help to your passability, and it might help to alleviate your desire to cover your face up with hair!

Quote from: Kelly J. P. on April 19, 2013, 06:29:03 AM
You look quite bundled up. Where do you live that's so cold to warrant all that at this time of the year?

That stuff you see all over the place is hail bouncing off my windshield. This was probably the last wintery day Wisconsin will have this season, so I'm glad I was able to take advantage of my full winter storm outfit!

I went to see Silver Linings Playbook and the experience was not anywhere near as terrifying as I had made it out to be in my mind. Nobody made me feel weird in any small way. Thank you Sandrauk and Kelly for your encouragement! Here is a success photo:



I am so happy to finally have passed that milestone, no matter how I may have been perceived by anyone.

Caramel,  You look just fine, maybe some lipstick/makeup.  Just relax & be normal/a woman. No one knows or cares what is between your legs as they say.

Been there, done that 100 times. The better dressed you are the better & more confident you will feel.

Have fun young girl, meet some friends as yourself, open up, let go, enjoy.

Quote from: Caramel Prisoner on April 20, 2013, 03:05:35 AM


That stuff you see all over the place is hail bouncing off my windshield. This was probably the last wintery day Wisconsin will have this season, so I'm glad I was able to take advantage of my full winter storm outfit!

I went to see Silver Linings Playbook and the experience was not anywhere near as terrifying as I had made it out to be in my mind. Nobody made me feel weird in any small way. Thank you Sandrauk and Kelly for your encouragement! Here is a success photo:



I am so happy to finally have passed that milestone, no matter how I may have been perceived by anyone.

Ooh... Are you, perchance, near Madison?
I know we had a bit of hail around noon; I dunno if it's the same place, though.
Edit: Hang on, is that Marcus Cinemas?  do I know you? :/

I think I'm borderline passing but I am not sure. This is day 46 of HRT (I took risperdal for my "schizoaffective disorder" (which in hindsight I think is just gender dysphoria induced psychosis and depression) for a year before this, so I have some cleavage with the help of makeup and a pushup bra =D)

Quote from: yanping on April 20, 2013, 11:18:10 AM


I think I'm borderline passing but I am not sure. This is day 46 of HRT (I took risperdal for my "schizoaffective disorder" (which in hindsight I think is just gender dysphoria induced psychosis and depression) for a year before this, so I have some cleavage with the help of makeup and a pushup bra =D)

Cute, petite Asian girl! I think you do...~ Shan ~

So...I'm actually 6' (the HRT made me shrink an inch?), I just curled up my body on the bed so you could see my legs, lol.

Quote from: yanping on April 20, 2013, 11:43:33 AM
So...I'm actually 6' (the HRT made me shrink an inch?), I just curled up my body on the bed so you could see my legs, lol.

Well what do I know huh? Still you seem have a petite body type!

Quote from: ZoeM on April 20, 2013, 07:35:24 AM
Ooh... Are you, perchance, near Madison?
I know we had a bit of hail around noon; I dunno if it's the same place, though.
Edit: Hang on, is that Marcus Cinemas?  do I know you? :/

I was over in Germantown! The Marcus Cinemas in the background was the one in Menomonee Falls!

I'm from Illinois, though, so I sadly doubt that we know each other... which is a real shame, because I was really hurting for someone to join me and help take the edge off the situation

Edit: Then again, looking at the similarity between our facial features............. maybe I am you? o__o

Quote from: Caramel Prisoner on April 19, 2013, 03:39:59 AM
Hi everyone.

I'd really like to spend today going around "dressed", but I'm scared of how people will react to me. Especially because I'm in an area I'm not too familiar with on business.

So your brutal honesty is expected and appreciated. I know I'm fragile but I'm ready. I know I still need to do a lot of work, but for today, do I look obviously male?




I posted on ->-bleeped-<- and got unclear responses. So, hello again, Susan's.

You don't look like a male for sure. You definitely pass. But the wig. I hate wigs. Even women look masculine while wearing them!

Quote from: ThetisnFurter on April 21, 2013, 01:22:21 AM
You don't look like a male for sure. You definitely pass. But the wig. I hate wigs. Even women look masculine while wearing them!

Wow, um... thank you!? I am completely shocked by that response.

As for the wig, that thing is my best friend in the world right now, I'll have you know! Until such a time as I am out to my friends and family, it's gonna be me and that wig sitting in a tree. Well, it'll be me, that wig, and a variety of hats to hide how big it makes my head look. It's a big tree, I guess.

Quote from: Caramel Prisoner on April 21, 2013, 02:23:51 AM
Wow, um... thank you!? I am completely shocked by that response.

As for the wig, that thing is my best friend in the world right now, I'll have you know! Until such a time as I am out to my friends and family, it's gonna be me and that wig sitting in a tree. Well, it'll be me, that wig, and a variety of hats to hide how big it makes my head look. It's a big tree, I guess.

Yeah, I know. I wore them, in past. In my first days... I was just like you. I don't know how many times asked these questions to myself. ''Oh, do they know I'm male? Why that guy gave me that look? Oh how do I look? Was that girl laughing at me?''

Well, it was worse than singing in front of 100.000 people! That's why I hate wigs so much. I wish, you will have your days with your own beautiful hair and you won't need a wig.

On the street around people that don't know you, definitely pass. I've discovered it doesn't matter how people that know you think, they'll always 'know' you even during transition......but the people that don't know you won't know.

Quote from: Caramel Prisoner on April 19, 2013, 03:39:59 AM
Hi everyone.

I'd really like to spend today going around "dressed", but I'm scared of how people will react to me. Especially because I'm in an area I'm not too familiar with on business.

So your brutal honesty is expected and appreciated. I know I'm fragile but I'm ready. I know I still need to do a lot of work, but for today, do I look obviously male?




I posted on ->-bleeped-<- and got unclear responses. So, hello again, Susan's.

Quote from: ThetisnFurter on April 21, 2013, 02:38:54 AM
Yeah, I know. I wore them, in past. In my first days... I was just like you. I don't know how many times asked these questions to myself. ''Oh, do they know I'm male? Why that guy gave me that look? Oh how do I look? Was that girl laughing at me?''

Well, it was worse than singing in front of 100.000 people! That's why I hate wigs so much. I wish, you will have your days with your own beautiful hair and you won't need a wig.

Yesss, that feeling is the worst! I reacted to those situations the other night by walking away really quickly... which I'm sure made me look suspicious even if no one was thinking anything. XD

I can not wait to finally be able to forgo the wig. I tried growing my hair out all of last year, but without any shaping or trimming, it looked like such a mess! Of course, I was also washing my hair every day with shampoo since I didn't know any better. I really wanted to go to a hairdresser and say, "MAKE THIS GIRLY. PLEASE." But I'm not quite there yet.

Thank you for the kind words, ThetisnFurter. And congrats on 15+ posts!

Quote from: lissabuchannon on April 21, 2013, 08:41:31 PM
On the street around people that don't know you, definitely pass. I've discovered it doesn't matter how people that know you think, they'll always 'know' you even during transition......but the people that don't know you won't know.

That's the second "definite pass" I've been given here from those pictures and I deeply appreciate it. I never thought I would receive a reaction like that. Thanks for the tip on people who know you being able to 'know' you even during transition. I feel that advice will almost definitely save me from an awkward situation at some point in the future.

took this pic last night right before i went out with my nephew and his friends

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How am I doin? Been a while since I've posted.