The other side of the coin from the favorite things thread.

I'll start... 

1. Getting up 1 hour earlier to do my make-up, hair, clothes before work every day.
2. Attention from guys. It's cool and affirming at first, but gets old fast. If another dude yells some cheesy pickup line at me from the window of their car while I'm out running or hits on me in the grocery store by pretending to need help finding stuff... I'll scream.
3. Getting treated like a 5 year old child... by mechanics, repair guys, or even some guys on dates that go: "Do you know how the game of football works? Do you even know how to keep score?" Then proceed to start explaining it to me like I'm their 5 year old child... hell I played the game for 6 years... I have an idea. Girls don't ever follow sports?
4. Women's Restrooms. They are dirtier and more crowded overall. The stalls are usually all occupied, seats wet/dirty and you find the strangest things lying around on the floor. Also it's like a club where women like to hang-out and talk at the sink/mirror. No more going in, doing your deed, and leaving. It's now a social event.
5. Money. It costs a whole lot more to be a girl. Clothes, make-up, hair stuff, underwear, et al are all stuff you have to spend a lot more money on.
6. Maintenance. It takes a whole lot more work to look "presentable" as a female. No more rolling out of bed, not fixing/combing my hair, throwing on any old t-shirt and shorts and walking out the door.
7. Becoming a member of the secret "women's club" where if you are alone in a room with another woman and 5 guys... the one woman will always want to start a conversation with me and suddenly want to be my best friend. Hair, clothes, make-up, whatever... sometimes people will find the most common and innocuous stuff to start a long boring conversation about.
8. Perception and stereotypes. Just because you may look like the average 20s-something chick doesn't mean I automatically like all the same things every other 20s-something chick does... like music, fun stuff to do, clubs and expectations. Everyone is different, and a book doesn't always match it's cover. Every person is different.

Quote from: JennX on May 22, 2013, 04:05:22 PM
The other side of the coin from the favorite things thread.

I'll start... 

1. Getting up 1 hour earlier to do my make-up, hair, clothes before work every day.
2. Attention from guys. It's cool and affirming at first, but gets old fast. If another dude yells some cheesy pickup line at me from the window of their car while I'm out running or hits on me in the grocery store by pretending to need help finding stuff... I'll scream.
3. Getting treated like a 5 year old child... by mechanics, repair guys, or even some guys on dates that go: "Do you know how game of football works? Do you even know how to keep score?" Then proceed to start explaining it to me like I'm their 5 year old child... hell I played the game for 6 years... I have an idea. Girls don't ever follow sports?
4. Becoming a member of the secret "women's club" where if you are alone in a room with another women and 5 guys... the one woman will always want to start a conversation with me and be my best friend. Hair, clothes, make-up, whatever... sometimes people will find the most common and innocuous stuff to start a long boring conversation about.
5. Money. It costs a whole lot more to be a girl. Clothes, make-up, hair stuff, underwear, et al are all stuff you have to spend a lot more money on.
6. Maintenance. It takes a whole lot more work to look "presentable" as a female. No more rolling out of bed, not fixing/combing my hair, throwing on any old t-shirt and shorts and walking out the door.
7. Perception and stereotypes. Just because you may look like the average 20s-something chick doesn't mean I automatically like all the same things every other 20s-something chick does... like music, fun stuff to do, clubs and expectations. Everyone is different, and a book doesn't always match it's cover. Every person is different.

Nothing!....LOL

Jenn...your #5,

Worth it!!

Number 1, definitely number 1.

For me, increase in toilet tissue usage. Oy! if only I pee less often lol.

I'll go with:
Whacking self with stuff. I didn't think it would be an issue. Turns out, you can't really prepare for having proper collision zones - I mean, breasts.

Crying. Yeah, in a meta sense it's awesome, but... Seriously, hormones? Why ya gotta act up in the middle of serious conversations?

Losing strength. I was never Samson to begin with, but now? Can barely open doors sometimes.

Being scared more.  I have to worry about my safety.

Being dominated.  Ok it's good in the bedroom,  but outside of that people shouldn't grab my arm when you want me to stay,  or physically move me around or give me orders.

I dont get hassled by guys so that's a non-issue for me.
Not only is clothing more expensive but everything is designed for layering these days. So you have to buy 3-4 items of clothing for an outfit.
Worrying about finding clothes that are flattering for your body shape. And remember the days when you could roll out of bed and have a slob day? I worry about my appearance a lot more that's for sure.

Worrying about ruining a manicured nail...

I brought my son fishing the other day when I attempted to put a hook on a clasp for him....I went to close clasp and it dented my nail. Its not that they were long...its just I only get a mani 1-2 times a year...its the only time my nails look good. Really felt like a goofy girl when I told him why I couldn't finish it. On the plus side there is usually a man around to help with snags!! that also happened

Hair sticking to chap stick! and...just hair its self!! If I could look as cute in a pixie as Kelly Pickler on Dancing with the Stars I would do it in a minute!!

Not knowing if a guy is flirting or just being a smart ass!!

Trying to put outfits together when I'm partially color blind!!! 

I'll still take all of these then rather then putting up with men's egos, talking only about fishing, hunting or nascar!! (football ok being treated like an idiot by men (still happens though) and having no sense of color or smell!!

Nothing I really hate on the whole it's great being a girl

The thing I hate is eyebrow maintenance it truly sucks. Everything else I adore.

 I hate very little about being a girl, so far as I've experienced. I am respected, and if someone assumes I'm less than knowledgeable about something, I will demonstrate my wealth of information.

I suppose I don't like it when guys insist on paying for things all the time (it feels unfair), and I can barely tell if someone is trying to be chivalrous or mischievous when he does something kind. A side-effect of always being teased and taunted.

I also don't like how it feels to shave and be prickly/itchy/sore the next day - all three, if I do the wrong places, just the first and/or second for most other places.

That's all that comes to mind, though.

I accept all things that come with transition, good, bad or indifferent.

Its just part of being who we are.

despite the little things, this is stuff I can handle way better. And feeling like myself, Well, that's priceless. I'm on the whole so very very much happier. Just wish I wasn't trans. that's the only downside.

The reduction in personal space. Seriously, I'm not that graceful--stand that close and I am going to step on your toe. It might even be accidental.
Being stared at and catcalled by blokes... if only they were pretty ladies. Sadness.
The assumptions that come with being perceived as a woman in terms of what I am interested in or care about or think. (Pink is still gross, leave me alone.)
Working harder for less credit, and having idiots trying to mansplain things at me.
Having my gender presentation and behaviour policed in an entirely new and exciting way.
That my world is significantly less safe. (Sorry, I have no joke for that one.)

But does it really matter in terms of being trans? I deal with this stuff because I'm female. Just like any other female. And like any good feminist, I work to try to change it.

Quote from: Sarah7 on May 22, 2013, 08:32:08 PM
But does it really matter in terms of being trans? I deal with this stuff because I'm female. Just like any other female. And like any good feminist, I work to try to change it.

Bravo!

If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

- Excerpt from Desderata by Max Ehrmann

I just started getting she'd and miss'd (even though I did get sir'd today, ughhhhhh) but being less safe. A couple weeks ago this guy was following me and then asked me if I needed something. Having men explain things to me without even asking. Most men are leagues nicer but I feel like some men are being pretty aggressive sometimes. But I may not be passing to these men and they just think I am super duper gay. But people have always thought that. I'll necro this thread in a couple months when I can no longer pass as a boy.

Whoa, we live in very different worlds... So lemme spam your post with comments.

Quote from: JennX on May 22, 2013, 04:05:22 PM
The other side of the coin from the favorite things thread.

I'll start... 

1. Getting up 1 hour earlier to do my make-up, hair, clothes before work every day.
To be honest, I find make-up (though to be honest I'm definitely not very much "into this" yet as I'm not full-time) and hair much simpler than shaving, which not only takes an eternity and hurts, but can also bring cuts that bleed a lot. But I'll admit actually choosing clothes rather than just picking anything on top of the pile because everything is ugly anyway will take some more time. Also, hair... it's actually simpler now. Before, I had to fight with my shorter hair so there weren't ridiculous "horns" poking up from weird places, or a weird curve. Now, if I don't wanna bother, I can: ponytail.
2. Attention from guys. It's cool and affirming at first, but gets old fast. If another dude yells some cheesy pickup line at me from the window of their car while I'm out running or hits on me in the grocery store by pretending to need help finding stuff... I'll scream.
3. Getting treated like a 5 year old child... by mechanics, repair guys, or even some guys on dates that go: "Do you know how the game of football works? Do you even know how to keep score?" Then proceed to start explaining it to me like I'm their 5 year old child... hell I played the game for 6 years... I have an idea. Girls don't ever follow sports?
I actually love this. I've never had the impression I was being taken for a five-year-old (except by my family, and with reason considering my history of forgetfulness and slowness), but the more I lean towards the female side, the more people are willing to explain things to me, and the nicer they are at doing it. Even my teachers get caught in that even though they know I'm not really a girl. Even got accidentally she'd once, yay. I'm a big question asker, and I've been noticing a steep decrease in the annoyance responses when asking, and an increase in the number and detail of responses. Can't wait until I get the full effect.
4. Women's Restrooms. They are dirtier and more crowded overall. The stalls are usually all occupied, seats wet/dirty and you find the strangest things lying around on the floor. Also it's like a club where women like to hang-out and talk at the sink/mirror. No more going in, doing your deed, and leaving. It's now a social event.
Wait what? Not only are guys' washrooms super dirty and full of pee everywhere (guys pee standing, in a toilet, not always aiming very well, and sometimes with the seat down) but they're smelly! When I still used the guys' bathrooms at school, out of the 5 stalls, I always had to search for one that wasn't TOO full of pee. (There was almost never one that was truly clean.) Often, there was only one. Sometimes, there was none. In almost all cases, I had to clean before sitting. Not to mention guys throw the water open at full power and put soap and water freaking everywhere. Assuming they do wash their hands, because there are more guys than girls that don't. Also, I've been using the girls' and unisex washrooms for over a year, and I've never seen the social club phenomenon. o.o
5. Money. It costs a whole lot more to be a girl. Clothes, make-up, hair stuff, underwear, et al are all stuff you have to spend a lot more money on.
You sure that's not mostly because you actually like what you're buying now? :p
6. Maintenance. It takes a whole lot more work to look "presentable" as a female. No more rolling out of bed, not fixing/combing my hair, throwing on any old t-shirt and shorts and walking out the door.
7. Becoming a member of the secret "women's club" where if you are alone in a room with another woman and 5 guys... the one woman will always want to start a conversation with me and suddenly want to be my best friend. Hair, clothes, make-up, whatever... sometimes people will find the most common and innocuous stuff to start a long boring conversation about.
Ooh, sounds fun. I always feel lonely in a crowd, and wish someone would talk to me, but I'm too shy to talk. Funnily, in my current in-between stage, I'm part of the old people's club. Old people are drawn to me like nails to a magnet, to tell me the most "what the...?" things or ask me for help with their cell phone or bus circuits. Maybe young women with glasses, who sorta look androgynous and are definitely not carefully groomed, are an old person's definition of a sympathetic person.
8. Perception and stereotypes. Just because you may look like the average 20s-something chick doesn't mean I automatically like all the same things every other 20s-something chick does... like music, fun stuff to do, clubs and expectations. Everyone is different, and a book doesn't always match it's cover. Every person is different.
Eh, honestly, nothing ever annoyed me as much as that very same thing for guys, a few years ago, and even now, occasionally. Mowing the lawn, being able to lift things, liking manual work, knowing anything about sport, liking to drink and handling my drink, sitting like my knees are being pulled apart by a torture machine, walking like none of my body is able to flex sideways, liking metal, hard rock, rap and/or whatever is "manly music", knowing anything about famous "manly" bands from the last century, knowing what a GI Joe is, liking action movies, handling sadness "like a man", not shouting like a girl... That's a crapload of annoyances and/or nightmares I'd never want. In comparison, females are allowed to be diverse.

More on-topic, I did have one bad experience with presenting as a girl a few months ago. It was starting to get dark, so they couldn't see very well that my passing was quite meh. I was running to the video club to bring a DVD back in time, before 18:00. On my way, there were four tall guys about my age getting out of their car to go to a restaurant. They definitely didn't look respectable, even though they weren't obvious thugs at all.

They called out to me, saying things I'm not sure I remember well, but maybe something like "Hey, beauty, where are you running to? Come here!" And for the first and last (so far) time of my life, I actually feared being aggressed by those guys. 99 % chance I saw all that as scarier than it was because it was dark, I was full of adrenaline from running and they were tall, but that didn't feel good. I thought I was running out of breath, but no, I ran even faster to get out of their sight as fast as possible.

I've had a lot "baseless" and distant fears in my life, like general fear of men, fear of aliens/ghosts/killers because of a movie I made the mistake of watching, fear of not passing, fear of HRT not having any effect, fear of committing suicide... but the fear of someone, here and now, harming you, is very different. I had never felt that before, because everyone kept expecting strength of me, and people who expect strength of someone don't really tend to attack.

I dont get male attention like some of the other women here. Guess I'm not much to look at then am I? :p
Hell, I'm just glad im not laughed at for walking down the street in a skirt.