Ok so, eh, hi!^_^

I'm sorry to start a new thread, but I'm kinda' confused, and I really want a little help..
I was born a female, but I have never felt like one. But I also don't really feel like a male! And it's confusing the hell out of me! I like to think of myself as neither, but if I were to choose, I would lean a little bit to the male side, I think. So I think I identify as a genderqueer? I have always felt this way, like, not fitting into a gender. I told my 2 close friends, and they're taking it very good! I was so afraid to tell my mom, but one day I told her, and she told me it was fine. It was a couple of weeks ago. But I don't think she even listened, or cared about it.

For en example: Me and my mom was shopping, and I found this perfume I liked. I told my mom it smelled really good, but then she replied with a "OH GOD THAT'S A PERFUME FOR MEN WHAT ARE YOU THINKING YOU ARE A GIRL, OK? DO YOU REALLY WANT TO SMELL LIKE A MAN!?". I also said to her I don't want bras, but I really wan't a binder. She told me "Oh, but the boys will love your boobs when you decide to dress proper, and show them off! Why would you want to hide them!?".
And yeah, it actually hurt my feelings a little. I took a lot of courage to tell her that stuff, but she doesn't even care.

I really want a binder, but I'm worried about how it will look. :/ I'm not skinny, I'm a little to the chubby side. I have very feminine curves, so I always wear loose-fitting t-shirts. That's what I feel most comfortable in. :3
But can I get a binder, that will fit? And also look ok, without a lot of fat bulging to the sides? My annoying chest is a D-cup, and I really want to hide it! I hate my chest, and I just want those stupid fatty lumps to be gone! Now!
So, can you guys suggest some good binders? And advice to what I should do with, yeah, everything? Strapless binders would be preferred. :]

Hugs from me, eheh. xD
- forkliftaddict

Oh btw. I'm Danish, so sorry for broken English!

it's too bad that most cis women don't understand how anyone would not want to show off their boobs if they're bigger than average...

for advice on binders, it's best to ask the guys in the ftm forums. they have an entire section dedicated to different kinds of gear
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/board,324.0.html

Hi Forkliftaddict.
Danish as well, but as far I remember im not allowed to writte in danish on the forum so "Broken english here as well" lol.
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I agree with Taka that its probably best to ask on the Ftm section about binding. I am not the right person to ask when it comes to bigger size or weight as I always been pretty skinny and had small boobs. But theres sure some who would be able to guide you.
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For the personal matter and acording to your mom.

I think your moms reaction is pretty typical specially if she dosen't know exactly whats going on,
I understand it hurts you but have you come out to her with your fellings dirrectly telling that your don't really feel that female or is it just the comments who dosent make you feel like coming out? if its because you havent come out for her then its very normal as she dosent understand, if you have come out to her then its abit more difficult, as she might still not get it or she might try to deny what you told her.

arg.. my text is a messy XD sorry, im abit tired I hope you understand otherwise ill explain.
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it could be a good idea to talk to others, theres diffrent groups for transgender and ftms around the country however most of it are in copenhagen.
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T-gruppen; has a facebookprofile which is open for everybody and they have meeting in diffrent areas of Denmark.
then theres a few other groups like, LGBT ungdom; which as mention is for young lgbt people. However they closed there trans meeting because there where to few and im not sure if they have started it again but I dont think so, still you can ask cause im not 100% sure.

theres also 2 ftm groups who goes online, But I wont recomend you to join there right now, because theres been conflicts about the rules on who should be allowed in and not. I myself had a couple of fights and I think those things sould be more clear before I would recomend it, They have a IRL meeting as well which isnt connected to any of the groups as far I been told, I been there a couple of times and its been fine, but again its manly in copenhagen =/ which suchs if your arnt from sjæland.

Familie og venner;
I think this group is also very relevant if you have came out to your parents. its in general for parents to talk to other parents and GLBT people and its a big help for many parrents who feel alone to gain some knowlegde and acceptence.
your are also wellcome but its not a must.

if you want I will send you some links on those places and and when there is IRL meettings. I cant link to the ftm-groups dirrectly because there secret" but I can give you the names and you can look them up yourself or I can add you in one of them.

Hi!

Well I'm new here, but I'd love to offer you some advice and I hope you find it helpful! I identify as genderfluid and I've recently started binding. I'm also on the bigger side; I wear a 44DDD/E depending on the style/brand and I also thought it would be difficult to bind without looking bulgy, but after a lot of research and consideration I got the 988 style binder from Underworks in XL and it's INCREDIBLE! I honestly have not been as flat as I am in this binder since before I was 12. It doesn't get me completely flat - I probably wouldn't be able to breathe if it did - but in a t-shirt that's a little too big you can hardly tell at all. It's also really comfortable and I have no trouble breathing. I have pictures I can post if you want!

But yeah, when I was doing my research I spent a lot of time looking on the ftm forums and that's where I found information about Underworks binders. You should check out those boards!