Quote from: Skye-Blue on June 17, 2013, 01:11:37 PM
In summary...Im f****** terrified of therapists and doctors...

They hold my life in their hands, they have all the power, I have none.

the only time they hold your life in their hand is if you have a relly bad illness, in the emergency room after an accident or a terminal illness. Other than that you have all the power because you are paying them either by cash or insurance.

Quote from: Sarah Louise on June 17, 2013, 01:13:45 PM
If you show that feeling of "terror" to the doctors they will continue to hold you back.

I definately agree. what you feel as terror they me be seeing as anxiety, being unsure and many other things.

What is the nearest larger town to you Skye? You may be better off finding a therepist there. I don't know how far you are from Vancouver but since you need to fly there just goes to say.

At least six or seven hours away...

Quote from: Skye-Blue on June 17, 2013, 01:25:56 PM
At least six or seven hours away...

It *is* possible for you to get there. It *is* even if you don't think so. Yeah, it'll cost you, in time and money, but what else can you do? You've told me your other option and it seems pretty expensive as well...

I'm just so done with fighting with doctors and therapists...at this point I would much rather give up.

Quote from: Skye-Blue on June 17, 2013, 01:29:57 PM
I'm just so done with fighting with doctors and therapists...at this point I would much rather give up.

Your attitude is hindering you more than any doctors or therapists ever could.

I'm sorry... But it had to be said. Maybe you *are* a victim, I can't really say. But having a victim's attitude *never* helps you in *any* way. It won't pull you out of this situation, it won't get you hormones, it won't get you a job. You need to have an attitude that is more conducive to improving your life and your circumstances. Even if it's hard...

Quote from: Skye-Blue on June 17, 2013, 01:29:57 PM
I'm just so done with fighting with doctors and therapists...at this point I would much rather give up.

Skye, I am not critisizing by any means, but if you say things like this to your doctor it may be why they he's hesitant. I know how you feel and have been to the point of giving up too. I would never tell a doctor this though, especially a Psychological therapist, Psychiatrist or General Praticioner.

Quote from: kyh on June 17, 2013, 01:20:18 PM
Don't let them push you around then. Not by retaliating, but by showing a side of yourself that is responsible and mature enough to make your own choices and your own judgments.

I'm pretty sure the doctor I saw wouldn't have prescribed me estrogen after just one week of knowing him if I didn't show him I was ready for it. Ready by already being full time, ready by already being on spiro, ready by knowing the risks and benefits, and ready by being a generally good and socially competent person. Of course, you *are* a good person, but if you're freaking out everytime you see a doctor, or withdrawing into your shell, they'll never see that.

What can you do to make yourself more ready (in the eyes of a doctor) for estrogen, for this responsibility? Do it.

Words of wisdom for sure kyh.

Quote from: Jess42 on June 17, 2013, 01:36:21 PM
Words of wisdom for sure kyh.

Do you have a Facebook? I know a group of trans women who might be able to help you. If you want more information, message me.

You have done nothing but ignore real advice and a road map
And than I can't mentality comes out....or your to isolated...
I live in a SMALLER town than you do....and if you hardly handnt
Learned anything from me you are purposefully setting your self up

First of all no therapist costs 450 for two hours...
I know them all...but you ignored....psychiatrist is free
But I'm not going to tell you how anymore. .I k ow which ones
In the area assess hrt readiness....but you always makr a
Reason...oh and these psychiatrist and psychologist will
Do Skype with me...

And one month of Spiro does nothing...I wrote out a itenary
In a mail to you many times....

You know my mom used to tell me I'm just a baby...I'm useless..
On and on... You know what happened...I kick started my lifeto
Prove her wrong....and it worked ...
Have fun

Quote from: Skye-Blue on June 17, 2013, 12:32:48 PM
My GP actually wanted to prescribe me cyproterone acetate, but I didn't want to take the risk of killing my liver. I'm regretting not getting androcur...this spiro isn't strong enough.

BTW, I've been on cyproterone acetate for 18 years. My liver function has always showed normal in tests. I'm also sensible about diet and alcohol (about 2 units per month!).