Do you family except you in your present role? I still have had some problems recently with one family member and I started my transition more than 12 years ago. My brother recently sent me a specialist birthday card that reads in great big letters on the front 'On your birthday Brother', that really hurt me so much.

It seems every family has at least one or two jerks.  Don't let it get you down, he sent it to annoy you.  If you think about it, he has achieved his intention.  Perhaps you should just send him a "Happy Birthday Sister" card on his birthday and forget about it.

Most of the important ones do.  I have an issue with my mother and probably will always have. She said that she didn't expect this when she brought me into the world. I said, Ford may have made your car but they didn't tell you where or how to drive it. It can be difficult for the family and friends. They have 2 options. Life, or what is left of it, is waaaay too short. Good luck.....

I'm sorry your brother is acting like a jerk.

I've been very lucky - no problems at all. It took my parents a while to get the name and pronouns straight, but they were supportive from the beginning; my sister was actually excited for me and really happy to have a sister, which shocked me. I even went to see my elderly grandparents and extended family this summer, and my grandfather kept calling my wife and me "the girls."

(My wife's family, on the other hand, disowned her when she said she'd stay with me. Her mother said it was divorce or they'd never speak to her again. But they were kind of nuts anyway.)

I'd have shredded that card and laughed about it.

My mother and all but 1 of my brothers have accepted me as my new role. They slip on the pronouns on a slight occasion, but they genuinely do treat me as a female. My mom even got me a birthday card that says "daughter" on it. I'm keeping it in my room as decoration and will probably never take it down.

In my present state, my family seems to be in a slow acceptance phase. I have no idea how things will play out long term once I've been on hormones for a while.

My family does accept me, and even though I still live my everyday life around them as male, they see me changing more like a woman and have started shifting over to treating more like a woman in the family. for example, last june, my mother gave me a pink cake and a lovely heart necklace. Another example was earlier this month, my aunt who I was worried about not understanding, gave be a lot of jewelry with a card with my new name on it, and in the card wrote, "It's all about the accessories girlfriend... Love aunt "her name".

I'm doing pretty poor on the acceptance front. But looking at it another way, they've only known for a few weeks. I've known most of my life. My anger, bitterness and disappointment is fading away.  Theirs is new. So I understand. I understand how they feel. I'm still hurt by it all. Only one really talks to me, but I understand. Only time will tell if they will change. It's their loss. I'll move on and be happy for once. Hopefully, they'll want to be along with me too.

my dad and alot of his family do (the afro cuban side) but on my moms side of the family (white russians) only my grand parents and some cousins do. my mom always despised me and only had me to trap my dad and my siblings that are female dont like me either.
its all cool though. im sure your family will level out and everything will be chill at some point 

Not yet. They accept that I am 35 and capable of making my own decisions. They do not agree with those decisions. I don't think they understand the difference between 'need' and 'want.' It's early, though. I don't know if they'll ever accept me, but they will probably tolerate me and some will come to accept it, if not all.

I'm not too popular with the family right now... and they're not too popular with me. Basically everything about them triggers me... but then basically everything triggers my dysphoria now. (I couldn't even get through a cowboy movie )

Yeah, all of them. I came out like a year ago and they all use correct pronouns and name, even the extended family members, and try to help me with transition.

I haven't talk to my family in 20 years because of an unrelated issue. My brother wouldn't care because he's gay unless he's got something against trans genders. My sisters might not care because they've Known since I was 4 that I dressed in female cloths. My nieces and nephews Don't Know I don't know How they would feel if they knew.  one niece  I communicate with would except me.

My parents and my niece do. My 2 brothers and sister do not. It's been well over 25 years since I've seen them or talked to them.  I've cried enough about this and now I just get on with my life. To me they no longer exist and I'll never forgive them.

My family has accepted me unconditionally. My sister always wanted a sister, and now we do everything together. They rest of my family likes me better, as I'm more comfortable, and easy going than I was. Even my  four year old nephew meets me at the door with 'Hi, Aunt Paula!'
Coming out to my family seemed SO difficult, but turned out easy.

Quote from: Naturally Blonde on November 16, 2013, 09:04:44 AM
Do you family except you in your present role? I still have had some problems recently with one family member and I started my transition more than 12 years ago. My brother recently sent me a specialist birthday card that reads in great big letters on the front 'On your birthday Brother', that really hurt me so much.

Just tell him that you are so happy Mum and Dad adopted him.   

Wife, yes she accepts me, as long as she doesn't have to see me or otherwise interact with me. But she is respectful.

Sons...one does, one doesn't. (He's not hostile though, just appears indifferent).

Daughter, yes. Even better: her two-year old daughter accepts me 110%. I showed up this past Friday to visit, wearing my new dress I'd made...the door opened, granddaughter saw me, and said, "Oooh! Pretty!"



What a little sweetheart.

I was adopted so sometimes I wonder if maybe it's easier for my family to accept it. Overall, they've been fine with it, except for my brother-in-law. It told my oldest sister first, and she was very accepting. But then I told her husband, whom I had always thought was pretty cool and down-to-Earth when I was a kid. He simply didn't approve, but it didn't end there. When his daughter got married a year or two after that, he got sloshed at the reception and had an awkward drunken conversation with me on the ride back to the hotel. He urged me to tell my parents. Not sure why that of all things was on his mind at the time, but it was. Recently, he's made comments like "I just can't believe he has boobs now, I'm not sure I can handle that!" Note this was well before I started HRT. It got back to my mom who relayed it to me. And then last year they were down here at their time-share condo and my parents went and saw them. I was living in the same city but my mom urged me not to go because it might cause drama and she wanted to protect me. Then last Christmas I got a heavily-religious card and no money, despite the fact that they're well off and most other years have sent me money or a gift card. I'm assuming it was my brother-in-law's idea. I try to shrug it off but it still sucks. And what bothers me most is that it not only bothers him, but he actually thinks about it from time to time. I rarely saw or interacted with him in my teens and onward, so I'm barely in his life as it is, and yet he dwells on it. :/

Anyway, after I told my oldest sister I told my other sister and she seemed enthusiastic about it. I haven't talked to her much since (I keep in touch with my siblings through my mom) but I saw her recently and even though we didn't talk about it, she seemed to skirt around it and seemed generally supportive. My oldest sister had talked to her and told me that she was excited to have a younger sister like she always wanted. And then there's my parents... I was so afraid to tell them, but once I was stable enough to live on my own and far away from them I sent my mom an email explaining everything. Surprisingly she was supportive! And she apologized for not seeing how hurt I was as a kid. She told my dad after some time, once she got up the nerve, and he seems accepting but hasn't really talked about it. I'm currently living with my parents while I save up to move next year, and they're helping me get to my appointments and whatnot and my mom asks me occasionally about how I'm feeling to make sure I'm handling the hormones alright. Still haven't told my brothers and I may never tell them, but my nephew is coming for Thanksgiving so if I tell him, he'll be the first male in the family that I've directly told since my brother-in-law. Hoping it'll go better...

I have a 1/2 brother that seems like your brother. I do not need him & I told him so point blank. That was 2 years ago & good riddance as they say.

Take care & good luck, girl friend

Dylan, (one of my five brothers, the others don't know yet) does while my mother seems more confused than anything.  I'm not sure, I guess I'll find out when I visit for Christmas..

Noooooooooooo