My wife and I aren't perfect... the situation is difficult and painful... but there's a LOT of hope for the future (a future that starts for us in 2014). The current question is whether we need to divorce and separate (financially and emotionally difficult for the kids, my wife, and myself); divorce and remain together by co-owning or having an owner/leaser arrangement for the house (difficult for health care for her as a part time employee, painful for her during transition, but very good for the kids); or remaining married (great for the kids, great financially, but extraordinarily painful for my wife and I - especially down the road if either or both of us need sexual companionship).

I see those as our only three options for early to mid 2014. I personally think #2 is the best compromise for everyone, but it remains to be seen if my transition will be more painful than our separation (she'll still see me often). I have a full apartment in the house aside from a kitchen and laundry ~ which could be added at relatively high expense. She and I could see each other as little or as much as fills our need.

I'll need to work on a proposal for this after Christmas. Does anyone have experience with this sort of situation (divorce and remaining co-owners of the house, which has little current value)?