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Why do trans girls SEEM like such negative nancys?

Started by Joanna Dark, December 16, 2013, 09:32:36 PM

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Miss_Bungle1991

Quote from: kabit on December 17, 2013, 01:41:13 PM
I also usually manage to poke myself in the eye when applying the latter.

This is one thing that scares me off on using eye make-up. The other is my hands shake too much. It's not because I'm nervous, it's some weird condition of a sort.
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Violet Bloom

Quote from: kabit on December 17, 2013, 01:41:13 PM
Not yet... not much, at least!

See... I pronounce those as non-rhyming!

(Tah-rah) and (Mas-care-ah)

I also usually manage to poke myself in the eye when applying the latter.

  Does it work if you say it with a British accent?

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KabitTarah

Quote from: Devlyn Marie on December 17, 2013, 01:48:19 PM
No worries, stop by Boston and we'll teach you how to pronounce that!   :laugh:

Hugs, Devlyn

I should stop by Boston some time :D

I don't claim a RI accent... but Tarah is soft voweled. (To avoid too much similarity to my mother's name, Terry).
~ Tarah ~

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Devlyn

Quote from: Violet Bloom on December 17, 2013, 01:49:23 PM
  Does it work if you say it with a British accent?

Shouldn't you be starting a "Bollucks up your British accent" thread?
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Violet Bloom

Quote from: Devlyn Marie on December 17, 2013, 01:54:44 PM
Shouldn't you be starting a "Bollucks up your British accent" thread?

  I will take that under advisement!

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RosieD

<SIGH> It's BOLLOCKS. When will you people learn?   ;)

Rosie
Well that was fun! What's next?
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Miss_Bungle1991

Quote from: H, H, H, Honeypot! on December 17, 2013, 04:10:13 PM
<SIGH> It's BOLLOCKS. When will you people learn?   ;)

Rosie

I learned that in 5th grade. Stop being such a negative Nancy!  :D :D
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Devlyn

Quote from: H, H, H, Honeypot! on December 17, 2013, 04:10:13 PM
<SIGH> It's BOLLOCKS. When will you people learn?   ;)

Rosie

One thing you won't be calling me is Ed.

Ed Ucation, that is!
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evecrook

what happened to all the negativity the universe is a duality
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Cindy

 :police:

OK people.

EVERYONE is welcome to this site and to post what they wish as long as it does not break the ToS.

People need as much support to buy a lipstick or clothes as they do to undertake GCS or any other procedure.

They can also post whatever avatar they wish as long as it is also within the rules.

I will also remind people that anything that 'outs' them is their responsibility and we strongly advise people to protect themselves and their privacy.

OK my avatar is pretty obvious of who I am and I have no issues with that as I am very well known in my society and I post such an avatar to support people who are still struggling with their issues.

That said the Moderators will not tolerate posts that suggest any member is more worthy or more female, male or androgyne than any other member.

Please bear in mind the feelings of others.

Cindy
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Vicky

My negativity depends on which wire in the circuit I am checking at the time.  A shocking concept to some people for sure, and sparks do fly. 

On the TG side of life, there are about 3 days a month when I can be pretty grouchy, and I can calendar them ahead of time since my endo is not about to change my hormone levels any time soon.

Fear and uncertainty are the biggest things that come out as being negative, and sure as it can be, my views on that have changed a lot since I first came here.  I won't say I am always positive these days, because it is sinking into me what I have really done, and I find caution  to be a better description of what I express than being dead set negative.  I am not the same person I was when I came here and with comfort in this community humor does take on a nicer glow even if I am the brunt of it.  Again though, fear and uncertainty are going to sound that way, and it does take time and  effort to turn that around.  A year ago I took the final scared step of sending some cashiers checks off to a surgeon, an anesthesiologist, and a hospital, and then got really scared for a few weeks, and there was not way I would seem the other way.  Some would say that today, I should be packing my bags out of Trans* places because I will be too happy the whole mess is kinda over and scare other people, or I will be too caustic on the other overly happy who just don't understand the situation.

We all can live through it, get some kind of a sense of humor, and stick around to listen to all the rest of the drama. 
I refuse to have a war of wits with a half armed opponent!!

Wiser now about Post Op reality!!
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Devlyn

As far as avatars are concerned, the site offers a large selection of pictures, characters and symbols in the avatar library. Lots of people browse through there and select one. It doesn't reflect on them one way or the other.

Hugs, Devlyn
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Joanna Dark

I could not care less about avis. But I will say I do like seeing when a long time member posts a photo in one of the vanity threads just so I can put a face to a name. It ups the level of intimacy and connectedness. I do wish some members would post a photo if even for a hald day just so I can see what they look like. And really what better place then here? There's not a large number, if any, amount of people looking to out anon trans peeps. It would be a food first step for some cause if ur serious about transition one day you will have to present female all day everyday. But I can understand the hesitation and to each their own.

the point of this thread was to make people see not all baad things or remarks are trans hate. This guy said what the hell when I wlked in a store the other day. Know why? Because it's not everyday you see a tiny white chick with her clevage exposed walking into a store in the freezing cold with her hair punked out. I wasn't clocked. I was just stunning, as in stunning peeps. What the hell lol that's the thing I no longer default to OMG he knows I'm trans! I know this cuz he was with all his friends and no one laughed they were just eyeing...my boobs ans awesomeness lol which is my boobs lol
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NatalieT

I just want to say how grateful I am for this community! Even just reading through a few pages of this has lightened up my mood this evening (running on UK time) and just given me that extra bit of determination to make the most of this life.

Xx
"There's no point in living, if you can't feel alive"
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Just Shelly

for the most part my life is positive!! The negative is that I am transgendered!

I at first figured I would transition to be a transgendered woman....after a short time pre transition I realized I really could be accepted as just another women. Now being a little over 2 years FT I am accepted as a woman anywhere I go...the few people who do know about me have accepted me as well....the only problem is it's a transgendered women!!

My biggest negatives are my financial situation, intimacy/relationship and having to be known as transgendered.

Financial-its a really bad place now!!

relationship- found a great man and possibly lover....problem  is he doesn't know about me :( ...him- "I would like to meet your kids" me- ahhh well I'm not ready for that" How could I possibly tell my children..."ahh children theirs someone I would like you to meet, please refer to me as your mom! I'm already deceiving him...I don't need to teach my children too!

Itamacy- see above....I have gone much farther than I should have..this was not something that was planned, but after 8 years without even a kiss...I needed to feel loved!

My last negative is with my children.....even though they have accepted me and supported me sooo much, I will always be transgendered! Yesterday I brought my youngest sledding...he was to meet a new friend, he told him his mother was dropping him off....I said, that's ok we'll just go with that for now. When I went to pick him up he opened up the door and introduced me to his friend...I said hi! when we left he told me that he told his friend his dad was transgendered....sigh......I'm not a dad nor am I a mom....I am transgendered.

As far as everything else....all thumbs up!!!

For anyone that is POST OP or stealth.....good luck not having some of the same experiences. I am essentially stealth to most, blend in very well, voice good, all legal documents changed...only thing missing is GRS. There is no way to completely hide your past...legal name changes are public! I won't abandon my children or make them call me mom....so that still remains. As far as GRS...yes this would definitely help with intimacy....if I wanted NSA type of relationship.

So yes I am positive....but there still is much to get down from at times!!
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Ltl89

Quote from: Joanna Dark on December 18, 2013, 03:21:01 PM
I could not care less about avis. But I will say I do like seeing when a long time member posts a photo in one of the vanity threads just so I can put a face to a name. It ups the level of intimacy and connectedness. I do wish some members would post a photo if even for a hald day just so I can see what they look like. And really what better place then here? There's not a large number, if any, amount of people looking to out anon trans peeps. It would be a food first step for some cause if ur serious about transition one day you will have to present female all day everyday. But I can understand the hesitation and to each their own.

the point of this thread was to make people see not all baad things or remarks are trans hate. This guy said what the hell when I wlked in a store the other day. Know why? Because it's not everyday you see a tiny white chick with her clevage exposed walking into a store in the freezing cold with her hair punked out. I wasn't clocked. I was just stunning, as in stunning peeps. What the hell lol that's the thing I no longer default to OMG he knows I'm trans! I know this cuz he was with all his friends and no one laughed they were just eyeing...my boobs ans awesomeness lol which is my boobs lol

I've thought about showing my face publicly, but after careful thought I really don't think so.  To be honest, there are creeps out there and some trolls who I don't trust having my picture.  You don't know who lurks out there and I'd rather be safe than sorry, especially since I do want to go stealth in the future.  How does any of us know if the guests are all innocent onlookers or if all the posters are who they say they are?  Perhaps I'm being paranoid and overly cautious, but I don't want any problems when my transition is going to set my entire future.  Having said that, I may be willing to share my picture with a select few in the future and you'd be on my list if I decide to do so.  I'm not there yet, but perhaps one day. :)

Yeah, now that I'm finally developing boobs (small ones but they exist), I've noticed that people tend to stare.  Sometimes it's a little uncomfortable because they aren't so subtle with their looks.  Then again, I have boobs and wear a bra in my andro "boy mode", so that may explain the stares, lol.  Can't wait to start part time/ full time, so I can be done with this in between phase.
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evecrook

Quote from: learningtolive on December 18, 2013, 05:17:38 PM
I've thought about showing my face publicly, but after careful thought I really don't think so.  To be honest, there are creeps out there and some trolls who I don't trust having my picture.  You don't know who lurks out there and I'd rather be safe than sorry, especially since I do want to go stealth in the future.  How does any of us know if the guests are all innocent onlookers or if all the posters are who they say they are?  Perhaps I'm being paranoid and overly cautious, but I don't want any problems when my transition is going to set my entire future.  Having said that, I may be willing to share my picture with a select few in the future and you'd be on my list if I decide to do so.  I'm not there yet, but perhaps one day. :)

Yeah, now that I'm finally developing boobs (small ones but they exist), I've noticed that people tend to stare.  Sometimes it's a little uncomfortable because they aren't so subtle with their looks.  Then again, I have boobs and wear a bra in my andro "boy mode", so that may explain the stares, lol.  Can't wait to start part time/ full time, so I can be done with this in between phase.
If I unzip my coat and walk down the street guys look at my boobs all the time it's a college town ,but since I just started I guess their wondering why.
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Rachel

When I started therapy a year ago I told the therapist my life has hit zero. I cursed that I was born and had no hope.

Almost a year later I have come a long way and done some things I though were impossible. Each time there was fear, pain and a little bit of freedom.

As the time passes I enjoy the freedom I earned and the pain is still there but fading.

I have a long way to go. I would say I am at 10 out of 100. I fought for the 10 and now enjoy the privilege I earned.

Not boob busting out all over but growing :)

When I come out at work I will post who I am with a pic. My wife made an ultimatum that if I come out we are over. Time and being myself ( changing self) may trump her ultimatum and render it irrelevant.

Work ultimatum is that when I come out "it must be done well".

HRT  5-28-2013
FT   11-13-2015
FFS   9-16-2016 -Spiegel
GCS 11-15-2016 - McGinn
Hair Grafts 3-20-2017 - Cooley
Voice therapy start 3-2017 - Reene Blaker
Labiaplasty 5-15-2017 - McGinn
BA 7-12-2017 - McGinn
Hair grafts 9-25-2017 Dr.Cooley
Sataloff Cricothyroid subluxation and trachea shave12-11-2017
Dr. McGinn labiaplasty, hood repair, scar removal, graph repair and bottom of  vagina finished. urethra repositioned. 4-4-2018
Dr. Sataloff Glottoplasty 5-14-2018
Dr. McGinn vaginal in office procedure 10-22-2018
Dr. McGinn vaginal revision 2 4-3-2019 Bottom of vagina closed off, fat injected into the labia and urethra repositioned.
Dr. Thomas in 2020 FEMLAR
  • skype:Rachel?call
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Miranda Catherine

Quote from: Carrie Liz on December 16, 2013, 09:53:40 PM
Yeah... admittedly it can get negative at times, because, well, this is a support site, so most of the posts are going to be from people who need emotional support and need people helping them. After a certain point in transition when everything is pretty much done, most people leave. If you look back to 2009-2010, 99% of the posters in them are nowhere to be found now. Every single year there seems to be a completely new list of members who are the most active, and then a year or two later they're all nowhere to be found anymore. Transition is temporary. Most people, once they're done, just go out and get back to living their lives, and they really don't have a need to be here anymore. Which means that at any given moment, a majority of the people here are always going to be those who are in the difficult parts of transition, and fighting through all of the physical and emotional changes, so most of the topics are going to be about that too.
First of all, Carrie, I'm looking at your avatar and your change is incredible, amazing! That is sooo neat!!! I've done the same thing in going back years on this site and I've noticed that most of the girls here then aren't here now. On another site I can't even name here, it's like that too, and at one point in time I needed to vent, but there was lots and lots of BS there, plus I didn't need it anymore. Everything you just said is very true! With the progress you've made it seems you won't be on forever either. I come and go on Susan's, but I really love the women here and the site itself. I bitch sometimes, but it never has to do with my life now, just the physical pain I'm in from my injuries and bad surgeries. I'll probably come on from time to time after SRS, because I was given hope each time I came here. I'm trying to do the same for new girls now that I have a few successful, wonderful years of finally living a life, not existing in an endless limbo. Life is finally good. Hugs, Mira
These three years have been the best of my entire life
ones I've been able to live without lying
and the only time I've had since the age of twelve
I haven't constantly thought about dying



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Shantel

Quote from: Miranda Catherine on December 18, 2013, 10:01:11 PM
First of all, Carrie, I'm looking at your avatar and your change is incredible, amazing! That is sooo neat!!! I've done the same thing in going back years on this site and I've noticed that most of the girls here then aren't here now. On another site I can't even name here, it's like that too, and at one point in time I needed to vent, but there was lots and lots of BS there, plus I didn't need it anymore. Everything you just said is very true! With the progress you've made it seems you won't be on forever either. I come and go on Susan's, but I really love the women here and the site itself. I bitch sometimes, but it never has to do with my life now, just the physical pain I'm in from my injuries and bad surgeries. I'll probably come on from time to time after SRS, because I was given hope each time I came here. I'm trying to do the same for new girls now that I have a few successful, wonderful years of finally living a life, not existing in an endless limbo. Life is finally good. Hugs, Mira

Atta girl Mira, some of us like to pay it forward and be big sis to the newbys for their sake!
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