Are you a natal female? Vaginismus per se is a natal female condition and uses different dilators from what a person with a Neo Vagina would use. While Mind Is Quiet Now has given a good description of what to do for Transsexual Post Op dilators, they are different from what natal females are given. Call your doctor and see if they or a nurse can bring you into the office and give you help on using them. You will be better off.