As a young guy it's not because God did it because Its not his fault but I feel like he could of did something, I question God on why, All these other guys out here I look at who treat women horrible know adays, They leave women with the babies, I would love to hear my wife say I'm pregnant when other guys just leave, Or just take for granted of the fact that their biological males and are capable of thoes things, It's so fustrating watching these guys disrepect their mothers, All I wanna do is be good son to mother but she will never see me as her son, I wanna be a good husband, father provider. And man of God but I can't do it the way I want to that's why my dysphoria gets so high because I see how these guys act it pisses me off to the fullest, This is why I ask why he blessed everyone else with a male body but, I ended being a wanna be man to alot of people

I understand your pain man.  I really do.  When I look at guys likes rapists, pedofiles, etc. I think to myself how it isn't fair that they get to have penises and I don't.  Sometimes I do feel like God hates me because I wasn't one of the lucky ones that got to be a biological male.  I personally believe that I'm transgender due to the broken world that we live in.  Could God have changed it to where I was a biological male?  Of course.  Why he didn't? I'm not sure why, but it came to a point for m where it's just too much trouble and stress to try and figure out why God couldn't influence the income with that.  Instead of dwelling on why I wasn't born a biological male, I figured it would be a bit easier to work with God instead of against Him. Instead of me throwing temper tantrums and hissy fits against God about why I was born a biological female, I try to focus on following the Biblical principles of manhood according to the King James Bible and what it means to be a man according to that.  It's a work in progress for me.

I posted this scripture in another thread, but I think it applies here too.


2 Corinthians 12:9 (KJV)

"And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me."


As Christian transgender individuals, I think it's crucial that we place our faith in Him to aid us with our transition, even when it's hard when it seems like all of this could have been avoided if he made us cisgendered.  Looking at the scripture above, I believe God is powerful enough to manifest Himself through us despite our weakness (which in this particular case, being transgender) to where you can be the man of God that you want to be.  A transgender man of God would be way more productive for Him than a cisgendered non-believer.

Another scripture that comes to mind is Genesis 50:20 which states: "But as for you, ye thought evil against me; but God meant it unto good, to bring to pass, as it is this day, to save much people alive."

Not that I think being transgender is inherently evil, but what I get from this scripture as a trans person is that even though we must go through this struggle, God can use it for good, and perhaps even help save other guys who will struggle with reconciling their faith with their transgender idenity (or just struggling with being transgender in general) from suicide.

I still hold onto my belief somehow, but it is very hard sometimes. I mean as transgendered we build a life and then have to see it crash down to fulfill some longing in our soul deep down, something we cannot understand. I sometimes feel like a chrysalis that is stepped on and only then can I emerge as a Butterfly only to be chased by a hungry cat. WHEW! It is HARD to be who we are, but you can't keep us down for long with G-Ds help. I just remember, G-D has a plan in all this craziness, we just have to trust what we feel and do what we think G-D expects of us. I stopped long ago living how I thought I should and let G-D do the driving now. One thing I have learned, it is not a boring trip!

There was a time when I was very religious. As I aged I come to the conclusion that if there is a God (I am Agnostic) then He/She/It really enjoys plucking the wings off of the butterflies. The people who are kind, mind their own business, and just try to live a happy life seem to be the ones who typically get the shaft.

Quote from: Brandon on December 26, 2013, 03:58:03 PM
As a young guy it's not because God did it because Its not his fault but I feel like he could of did something, I question God on why, All these other guys out here I look at who treat women horrible know adays, They leave women with the babies, I would love to hear my wife say I'm pregnant when other guys just leave, Or just take for granted of the fact that their biological males and are capable of thoes things, It's so fustrating watching these guys disrepect their mothers, All I wanna do is be good son to mother but she will never see me as her son, I wanna be a good husband, father provider. And man of God but I can't do it the way I want to that's why my dysphoria gets so high because I see how these guys act it pisses me off to the fullest, This is why I ask why he blessed everyone else with a male body but, I ended being a wanna be man to alot of people

Brandon,

A person can have a penis but still not be a man.  Being a man is so much more and you understand that in your soul.  You are more of a man than they will ever be.

Jen

Quote from: JLT1 on December 27, 2013, 11:49:03 PM
Brandon,

A person can have a penis but still not be a man.  Being a man is so much more and you understand that in your soul.  You are more of a man than they will ever be.

Jen

I understand that and I also know that,  But their are certain things a man has to do and some of thoes things I can't acheive in this body

Quote from: Simon on December 27, 2013, 11:32:38 PM
As I aged I come to the conclusion that if there is a God (I am Agnostic) then He/She/It really enjoys plucking the wings off of the butterflies. The people who are kind, mind their own business, and just try to live a happy life seem to be the ones who typically get the shaft.

Oh yes, first reading Brandon's OP a few days ago I was immediately reminded of the story of Job in the Bible.

I guess it just comes down to whether you think it's all part of the plan to make you a stronger, better person, who learns his lesson on loving and respecting God, or if you think it's some sort of punishment or horrible game.

My opinion, there's really no point in believing in God (or following a religion) if you can't trust God to know what's best for you. So, if you trust/believe, then there's no reason to feel resentment. We might not like what's been given to us, whether it's being trans or any number of ailments/undesirable traits, but if we don't have the power to change what's been given to us we need to learn how to accept it and learn from it. It does seem unfair when "bad" people seem to get all the goods in life, but we do need to look to really see if they're really getting the goods-- a mansion and nice cars and clothes is only good from a materialistic point of view and might not be something that's good from a spiritual perspective is just one example.  Sometimes living the harder life is what makes you a better person in the end. While it sucks to not be born biologically male, and to see biologically males seemingly waste the benefits, you just need to trust that those who seem to be wasting what was given to them are following their own path for better or worse and that you're just following your own path as best as you can. Hopefully, when you're up at those pearly gates you can feel good about your life and say all that you've done despite the hardships placed upon you.

Quote from: LearnedHand on December 27, 2013, 11:54:53 PM
Oh yes, first reading Brandon's OP a few days ago I was immediately reminded of the story of Job in the Bible.

I guess it just comes down to whether you think it's all part of the plan to make you a stronger, better person, who learns his lesson on loving and respecting God, or if you think it's some sort of punishment or horrible game.

My opinion, there's really no point in believing in God (or following a religion) if you can't trust God to know what's best for you. So, if you trust/believe, then there's no reason to feel resentment. We might not like what's been given to us, whether it's being trans or any number of ailments/undesirable traits, but if we don't have the power to change what's been given to us we need to learn how to accept it and learn from it. It does seem unfair when "bad" people seem to get all the goods in life, but we do need to look to really see if they're really getting the goods-- a mansion and nice cars and clothes is only good from a materialistic point of view and might not be something that's good from a spiritual perspective is just one example.  Sometimes living the harder life is what makes you a better person in the end. While it sucks to not be born biologically male, and to see biologically males seemingly waste the benefits, you just need to trust that those who seem to be wasting what was given to them are following their own path for better or worse and that you're just following your own path as best as you can. Hopefully, when you're up at those pearly gates you can feel good about your life and say all that you've done despite the hardships placed upon you.

Well everyone falls short of his glory, We all wonder why God sometimes does the things he does, That's why It takes building your faith, But it doesn't stop me from being upset about this, Or wondering or questioning

Quote from: Brandon on December 26, 2013, 03:58:03 PM
As a young guy it's not because God did it because Its not his fault but I feel like he could of did something, I question God on why, All these other guys out here I look at who treat women horrible nowadays, They leave women with the babies, I would love to hear my wife say I'm pregnant when other guys just leave, Or just take for granted of the fact that their biological males and are capable of those things, It's so frustrating watching these guys disrespect their mothers, All I wanna do is be good son to mother but she will never see me as her son, I wanna be a good husband, father provider. And man of God but I can't do it the way I want to that's why my dysphoria gets so high because I see how these guys act it pisses me off to the fullest, This is why I ask why he blessed everyone else with a male body but, I ended being a wanna be man to alot of people

You know, Brandon, the body does not make the man.  What makes a man is the content of his character.

"Men" don't leave their partners with babies, or treat women horribly.  Just because they can make babies doesn't mean they should be parents.  I see no reason why you can't fill the role you desire, save being a biological father (at this time in history).  But there are many sterile males who are men, fathers, providers, role models.

Don't sell yourself short.  I think you have what it takes, if you can get past your "birth defect."  Maybe you are being tested.  Maybe your path has been harder, but because of it, you will be stronger.

Quote from: Brandon on December 27, 2013, 11:53:15 PM
I understand that and I also know that,  But their are certain things a man has to do and some of thoes things I can't acheive in this body

And what are these things?  You cannot biologically make 1/2 child given the current state of biotechnology.  Don't bet on it 10 years from now.  However, you can be a father to one.  Being a father is far tougher btw.  Remember, you can do all things through Him.

Jen

Quote from: Brandon on December 28, 2013, 12:12:13 AM

Well everyone falls short of his glory, We allb wonder why God sometimes does the things he does, That's why It takes building your faith, But it doesn't stop me from being upset about this, Or wondering or questioning

I like what you said "building your faith". Questioning and wondering about God's plan can be good because it can show you to see short comings and where you can make changes to be closer to God. 

We just sometimes need to wary of how our questions are framed in our minds because earthly desires can limit the amount of answers we see as acceptable in or minds. If I remember correctly, Job at first tried questioning but because he was blind to some of his own faults he wasn't able to see the answer. Things didn't start improving until he said  something like 'i trust Him even though he kills me', and then later on repented and forgave others.

Like your said, its all things we work on during our lifetimes. I am sure things will get better for you if you keep working at being a good person and developing trust in God. 


--------
http://www.lcg.org/cgi-bin/lcg/studytopics/lcg-st.cgi?category=Christianity1&item=1122911276

Quote from: JLT1 on December 28, 2013, 12:24:57 AM
And what are these things?  You cannot biologically make 1/2 child given the current state of biotechnology.  Don't bet on it 10 years from now.  However, you can be a father to one.  Being a father is far tougher btw.  Remember, you can do all things through Him.

Jen

Yea and that's the thing I have to get over and it's really not that easy from what I had already stated in my very first post, That's why it fustrates me even more, I've heard numerous guys say that if they got a woman pregnant they would leave her, Then that's when I start to question, Why did he make these fools males most of these guys out here know adays only care about getting a quick fix then its on to the next maybe he should have made them female to know how it feels because my mother is a single mother and you bet it was hard as hell on her, This is why she didn't want a son but she has one she doesn't realize that she has one. Being around stupid ass guys like that just makes my dysphoria sky rocket

First I want to say with no disrespect ment,that I'm suprised at the responses given.you would think that many forums of encouragement would make one stop questioning that encouragement but some people always want to be right.second,ain't nobody can help tou brandon but God.rant all you want and even question all you want while everyone elses comforts you but the issue here is you.if a man sticks his foot in a bear trap,can he be saved if he refuses to remove it? Good luck bub.

Quote from: Chaos on December 28, 2013, 01:08:11 PM
First I want to say with no disrespect ment,that I'm suprised at the responses given.you would think that many forums of encouragement would make one stop questioning that encouragement but some people always want to be right.second,ain't nobody can help tou brandon but God.rant all you want and even question all you want while everyone elses comforts you but the issue here is you.if a man sticks his foot in a bear trap,can he be saved if he refuses to remove it? Good luck bub.

No its really not me but it's whatever, Think what you want, You act like no ne ask these things you act like this ->-bleeped-<- is just easy o get through well its not! Its easy to say but not easy to do so again think what you want

Quote from: Brandon on December 28, 2013, 11:52:41 AM


Yea and that's the thing I have to get over and it's really not that easy from what I had already stated in my very first post, That's why it fustrates me even more, I've heard numerous guys say that if they got a woman pregnant they would leave her, Then that's when I start to question, Why did he make these fools males most of these guys out here know adays only care about getting a quick fix then its on to the next maybe he should have made them female to know how it feels because my mother is a single mother and you bet it was hard as hell on her, This is why she didn't want a son but she has one she doesn't realize that she has one. Being around stupid ass guys like that just makes my dysphoria sky rocket

This world is broken and not perfect, Brandon.  Though God had His hand in creating us, bad things still happen and man still has free will: including the free will to take care of his family or not.  Here's what the King James Bible has to say about these type of men:

1 Timothy 5:8 "But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel."

Clearly, God does not favor a man who fits the bill of 1 Timothy 5:8. 


Quite honestly, I would rather be a transman that has covering for my sins, than to be a cis male that has rejected the free gift of salvation and has to answer for all of his foolishness that he did on Earth at the Great White Throne judgement.

The point is, it's okay to question why you and why not them, but it becomes unhealthy to focus on that with no rest until you find the answer.  In reality, it doesn't matter what the answer is because it wouldn't make you into a biological male anyways.  If anything, it would be another thing to stress out about.  The best thing you can do for your own sanity is to play with the cards you've been dealt with and make the best of your situation.  If you need a comfort scripture, then look to Romans 8:28 which states "And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose."

Quote from: Malachite on December 28, 2013, 05:22:35 PM
This world is broken and not perfect, Brandon.  Though God had His hand in creating us, bad things still happen and man still has free will: including the free will to take care of his family or not.  Here's what the King James Bible has to say about these type of men:

1 Timothy 5:8 "But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel."

Clearly, God does not favor a man who fits the bill of 1 Timothy 5:8. 


Quite honestly, I would rather be a transman that has covering for my sins, than to be a cis male that has rejected the free gift of salvation and has to answer for all of his foolishness that he did on Earth at the Great White Throne judgement.

The point is, it's okay to question why you and why not them, but it becomes unhealthy to focus on that with no rest until you find the answer.  In reality, it doesn't matter what the answer is because it wouldn't make you into a biological male anyways.  If anything, it would be another thing to stress out about.  The best thing you can do for your own sanity is to play with the cards you've been dealt with and make the best of your situation.  If you need a comfort scripture, then look to Romans 8:28 which states "And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose."

Yea you have a free will to do whatever you want but it doesn't make it right, I can't snap a finger and alll of the sudden be ok with not being a biological male, We all have to answer to God wheather your even athiest or not, My point is that its still gonna bother me, Its not just gonna go away, Your out of highschool I still have to deal with the nonsense and stupidity out of other guys in almost every class its messed up that I have this body and have this body and have to prove myself while they get to be jack asses and dog women, And the bad part about is these women don't care, No I shouldn't have to go through all this ->-bleeped-<- to be happy and prove that I am a man , while these dumb dudes who think their men run around here and whip out their dick for a quick fix and get girls pregnant and leave, My sisters dad left my damn mom and had another family, My sister doesn't even talk to him, My damn dad cheated on my mom and put her through hell and was a drug addict and all they did was argue, Their not even together, I have every right to be pissed off. My point is either way it's going to bother me when I'm seeing this everywhere and I'm young and it's gonna take a minute to get over, To all the other ftms your telling me your not angry not even the slightest bit upset, Maybe you have never seen what I seen so it doesn't bother that much, This is why my dysphoria is so high, And I know God favorite that type of man its a matter of why God blessed dummies with a male body

Quote from: Brandon on December 28, 2013, 05:46:45 PM

Yea you have a free will to do whatever you want but it doesn't make it right, I can't snap a finger and alll of the sudden be ok with not being a biological male, We all have to answer to God wheather your even athiest or not, My point is that its still gonna bother me, Its not just gonna go away, Your out of highschool I still have to deal with the nonsense and stupidity out of other guys in almost every class its messed up that I have this body and have this body and have to prove myself while they get to be jack asses and dog women, And the bad part about is these women don't care, No I shouldn't have to go through all this ->-bleeped-<- to be happy and prove that I am a man , while these dumb dudes who think their men run around here and whip out their dick for a quick fix and get girls pregnant and leave, My sisters dad left my damn mom and had another family, My sister doesn't even talk to him, My damn dad cheated on my mom and put her through hell and was a drug addict and all they did was argue, Their not even together, I have every right to be pissed off. My point is either way it's going to bother me when I'm seeing this everywhere and I'm young and it's gonna take a minute to get over, To all the other ftms your telling me your not angry not even the slightest bit upset, Maybe you have never seen what I seen so it doesn't bother that much, This is why my dysphoria is so high

No one is saying that you don't have the right to be angry. Given your situation, you have every right to be angry.  Many of us here has had our own personal hell to go through, including myself, so we know it isn't easy to deal with.  I haven't been out of high school for a super long time, so I know about the foolishness that guys and girls do there.  It's can be frustrating as a young trans person, yes, but as a Christian, we aren't supposed to be conformed to how they are doing anyway.  The only standard that you need to prove your manhood is the standards that are layed out on the King James Bible.  That should be your main focus on proving yourself as a man.  You say that the women there don't care, well using the Bible's standards on finding a good women will help weed out the ones that aren't good for you.  However, I believe just focusing on your studies would be the best course of action for you, especially being a junior. 

I know what you're going through is hard, and that you can't snap your fingers and you will be perfectly fine with not being a biological male.  If that was the case, then many of us would be snapping our ingers until they fall off.  What you need to do is pray to God.  None of us can ease the hurt and pain you have experienced with your dysphoria and your family like He can.  You just need to lay it all out there for Him and seek His guidence concerning your path. Everything that you're dealing with, you need to take it to Him. We all can give our advice and words of comfort, but that will only go so far unless you cry out to Him for yourself. 

My whole point at first was to state that brandon,I have never once seen you say 'Thank you' to those who have continued to lift you and encourage you.regardless of what one goes through,should we use people and dismiss them all together? And my comment ment nothing more then to say that YOU must want to see your situation differently.YOU are you one that carries it all and refuses to face God with it,the very one you blame.who else can guide you if even God his self can not?

Quote from: Chaos on December 28, 2013, 07:14:22 PM
My whole point at first was to state that brandon,I have never once seen you say 'Thank you' to those who have continued to lift you and encourage you.regardless of what one goes through,should we use people and dismiss them all together? And my comment ment nothing more then to say that YOU must want to see your situation differently.YOU are you one that carries it all and refuses to face God with it,the very one you blame.who else can guide you if even God his self can not?

Oh I do thank people, Only the ones who deserve a ThankYou, The ones who don't jump down my throat and don't say stuff to make me mad, And I really don't think you have read all my post to know if I thank people or not, And are you with me 24/7 to know when I talk to God, I don' think so

Quote from: Brandon on December 28, 2013, 07:22:26 PM
Oh I do thank people, Only the ones who deserve a ThankYou, The ones who don't jump down my throat and don't say stuff to make me mad, And I really don't think you have read all my post to know if I thank people or not, And are you with me 24/7 to know when I talk to God, I don' think so

So you feel that all the people in all the threads you have posted,the people who took their time and love to encourage you,was not worth a thank you because they 'jumped down your throat'? You are a child and I will leave it at that.God bless you.