I guess I'm coming from a different place. I made the decision  to transition to the opposite sex ,if totally up to you how you want that decision to play out, I just feel that I can't hide who I am, I hid for a long time as a pretend male I just let things play out naturally. I won't hide any more. Of course there's only a problem of hiding if it's not obvious.

Quote from: missy1992 on February 03, 2014, 05:02:44 PM
But that seems to be the easiest way to meet men, through mutual friends. I met this guy at a party a good friend of mine was having. Your right though, I am definitely setting myself up for outing if things don't go well and the prospect of that occuring keeps playing out in my head making me feel nervous and anxious.

<poking my head in>

I agree with Yasmine.  The risk of your new group of friends finding out just isn't worth it.  I certainly wouldn't risk it for "Mr. Right Now".  I think you should only date outside the group/outside of the people you meet via this group.  If you want to remain stealth, I don't see how you have any other option.

Quote from: Yasmine on February 03, 2014, 07:16:26 PM
Well, you could always meet up with him. You don't have to do or say anything. Maybe at some point you can test the waters a bit. For 'instant fun' I'd hook up with someone else though. Someone you can be open to right away. Someone from another city hehe.

like me..bahaha it had to be said

Quote from: Brett on February 03, 2014, 07:34:54 PM
<poking my head in>

I agree with Yasmine.  The risk of your new group of friends finding out just isn't worth it.  I certainly wouldn't risk it for "Mr. Right Now".  I think you should only date outside the group/outside of the people you meet via this group.  If you want to remain stealth, I don't see how you have any other option.

That makes sense, if staying stealth is the end all and be all of it all.

I should say that right now I am in stealth however not 100% as I think such a thing is impossible. For one, I still live in the same city I was born in. In class today, I saw a boy I knew from highschool pre transition. We made eye contact in the hall and exchanged a smile. He knows who I am, and had me on Facebook. What would prevent someone like him from telling other people in the class I take with him about my past?

It sounds like I want my cake and to eat it too, doesn't it? Should I risk it for the biscuit? What if what if oh what if...

Well... things didn't work out unfortunately

My rule of thumb is for booty calls I don't tell. That's the whole point of a booty call haha. But for those I see a relationship with I tell when the time is right. Like when they ask if I have any secrets. Then I tell them. That's normally not for a while though