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Name trouble, need help

Started by Shana-chan, January 31, 2014, 07:05:07 PM

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ath

I was born in 1989, and I'm 25 now, so I was born nowhere near 1924. I do know a 7 year old named Violet, though. I don't mind having an anachronistic name.

It does seem like a stage name though - that's my main hang up on it. Not sure I'd want that as my actual name. Are 'Victoria Black' and 'Veronica Black' sound any better though?

Another one I like is Lucy - pretty much the only non-V name I like.
"When I think of all the worries people seem to find
And how they're in a hurry to complicate their mind
By chasing after money and dreams that can't come true
I'm glad that we are different, we've better things to do
May others plan their future, I'm busy lovin' you "
-The Grass Roots
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Danniella

Quote from: ath on February 04, 2014, 04:16:39 AM
I was born in 1989, and I'm 25 now, so I was born nowhere near 1924. I do know a 7 year old named Violet, though. I don't mind having an anachronistic name.

It does seem like a stage name though - that's my main hang up on it. Not sure I'd want that as my actual name. Are 'Victoria Black' and 'Veronica Black' sound any better though?

Another one I like is Lucy - pretty much the only non-V name I like.

I guess "Black" is a hard second name to work with :D

At least the good thing about this naming process is that you can try it on for a while and see how it fits, just get some of your close friends in on it, explain to them that you are trying a new name for a while and get them to call to you as that for a bit, see how it goes?
You say "Using humor as a defence mechanism" like it's a BAD thing!



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FalseHybridPrincess

If you like it then it doesnt have to sound good to others,,,

Violet is a nice name ,,, victoria and veronica are nice too

Id go with victoria but im not you so yeah XD
http://falsehybridprincess.tumblr.com/
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JaneNicole2013

Quote from: ath on February 04, 2014, 04:16:39 AM
I was born in 1989, and I'm 25 now, so I was born nowhere near 1924. I do know a 7 year old named Violet, though. I don't mind having an anachronistic name.

It does seem like a stage name though - that's my main hang up on it. Not sure I'd want that as my actual name. Are 'Victoria Black' and 'Veronica Black' sound any better though?

Another one I like is Lucy - pretty much the only non-V name I like.

Victoria is age appropriate. My girls are about your age and had friends with that name. What about Valerie? That might be a bit too old for you though...
"The privilege of a lifetime is being who you are." -- Joseph Campbell



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ath

Another name I've thought of was Clara. I don't think it sounds bad with the Black name. Clara Black. However it would make me and my sister have rhyming names, lol. So I think right now I'm leaning more towards Victoria.

Valerie is also a good one - I haven't thought about using it yet. Could be a contender haha.

As for middle name, I'm pretty set on Alexandra. I know way too many Alexes and Alexandras and Alexandrias, etc. For me to want such a common name as my first name, but I do like the name Alexandra.
"When I think of all the worries people seem to find
And how they're in a hurry to complicate their mind
By chasing after money and dreams that can't come true
I'm glad that we are different, we've better things to do
May others plan their future, I'm busy lovin' you "
-The Grass Roots
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Chic

My birth name is Dylan, and it's unisex, plus I love it, so I'm not gonna change it.
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Hikari

#26
I personally don't care about an "age appropriate" name if there ever was such a thing. My name that I picked doesn't make the SSA.gov list of top 1000 names for my birth year. In fact it doesn't make the top 1000 from 1984 to 2008, and peaked in popularity at 65th most popular girls name in 1915, though in a weird bit of strangeness in the last decade it has been in the 500s. This name just "fits" for me, even if it was much more popular in 1885 than 1985.

I would like to point out though, my name is an anagram of my mothers name which hasn't been in the top 1000 since 1962 and peaked at 352 in 1921. It was never a popular name.

The way I see it, having some sort of connection to a name is more important than the statistical data behind it; I mean Jessica Smith would be an incredibly common name for someone of my generation but, that name just wouldn't feel like me.

By the Way, I find the best place to find first name data is http://www.ssa.gov/OACT/babynames/#ht=2 the SSA will track names for you back to the 1800s if you want, without trying to sell you anything. Of course this data is all based on US Social Security data and might not be 100% accurate (for example I wasn't issued a Social Security number til the 90s because I was born at home with no paperwork filed, and some groups like the Amish opt out of Social Security) but, it can at least be broken down by state, year, etc.

Edit: Just noticed my male birth name was in the 30s in popularity in the 1880s and in the 200s in the 1980s; so I guess I always had an old timey name.
15 years on Susans, where has all the time gone?
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Allyda

My birthname can be either boy or girl so I haven't saw the need to change it. Sure there are other names I like better such as Julie, anna, etc., that are more femminine but I lost my biological Mom when I was six. And keeping the name she gave me just feels right. The only thing I need to change on my paperwork is gender. Allyda is my first middle name. My first name is Phoenix, so my friends just call me Phoe for short. It just fits me. ;)
Allyda
Full Time August 2009
HRT Dec 27 2013
VFS [ ? ]
FFS [ ? ]
SRS Spring 2015



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allisonsteph

Quote from: Hikari on February 04, 2014, 05:09:36 PM

By the Way, I find the best place to find first name data is http://www.ssa.gov/OACT/babynames/#ht=2 the SSA will track names for you back to the 1800s if you want, without trying to sell you anything. Of course this data is all based on US Social Security data and might not be 100% accurate (for example I wasn't issued a Social Security number til the 90s because I was born at home with no paperwork filed, and some groups like the Amish opt out of Social Security) but, it can at least be broken down by state, year, etc.


Thank you for that. My chosen name was number 202 the year I was born... and I'm happy with that. Plausible for someone my age yet not overly popular to the point of being cliche. My birth name on the other hand is in the top 20 for the year I was born and always hated that.
In Ardua Tendit (She attempts difficult things)
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Claire (formerly Magdalena)

I worried over it for a little while. I had it narrowed down to a few names and finally just picked one arbitrarily. You have some room to try it on, take it out for a test drive. You can change your mind if you don't like it. Relax. The right one will come to you.

I'd rather see the world from another angle
We are everyday angels
Be careful with me 'cause I'd like to stay that way



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April Lee

My mother once told me that if I had been born a girl, she would have named me "April". That also happens to be the month I was born in. Lee was the middle name of my mother.
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Shana-chan

Imo it shouldn't matter how "popular" your name is that you chose, even if it does draw some attention. What matters is if you like it or not. Take the name I came up with, it's not in the top 1000 female names for at LEAST the last 100 years! I'll be darned if I'm going to let people/fear/drawing attention etc. decide what name I go with! I've had enough of that crap as it is anyway and they're NOT getting the better of me with my name! No, what I'm more concerned with is whether it's normal or not for it to feel weird and like it is my name yet not my name when people call me by the name I chose? Maybe it just takes time? Also, I am TERRIBLE at naming anyone/thing and it can take me hrs just to name a single thing. -_- So for myself I can see it taking a LOT longer... -_-
"Denial will get people no where."
"Don't look to the here & now but rather, to the unknown future & hope on that vs. the here & now."
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katiej

It really comes down to what you're like as a person.  IMO it's actually not too different from the passing vs not passing argument.  If your goal is to blend in, a super unique name/spelling can work against you.  But if that isn't important, then you can be as creative as you want.

Another consideration is what you do for a job...or hope to someday.  In corporate America, a unique name on a resume can actually make it more difficult to get interviews.  It shouldn't be that way, but it is.

In any case, Violet isn't a strange name by any means.  Of your choices, I'd pick Victoria.  But if you like Violet...go for it!
"Before I do anything I ask myself would an idiot do that? And if the answer is yes, I do not do that thing." --Dwight Schrute
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Missadventure

Quote from: LivingTheDream on January 31, 2014, 10:25:15 PM
Dang, I wrote a nice reply and I backed up before I posted... Let's see how this one comes out lol.

I kinda think any name you choose is gonna start off a bit weird because all you're life you've been called one name and have grown used to it. I think it will prolly take some getting used to being called a new name as well.

Are there any names you've heard growing up that you really like? Have you tried looking up baby names on the web or in a book, maybe you could find an awesome name that way. You could also ask your parents what your name might've been if you were born a female.

Yeah. Your name has strong ties to your sense of identity. In many ways we define ourselves by name. Obviously as we transition we're changing our identity (even if only on the surface), so a new name is appropriate. But, it feels strange at first because it's a detachment from the identity we're used to. I know for the first week people started using me girl name I tended to ignore them. Not intentionally. I just was so used to hearing my boy name that I had to hear that for my brain to turn that "they're talking to me" switch on. Then once I trained my brain to switch that on when I hear my girl name I still felt awkward about it for about a week or so, although I don't really know why. But now I'm used to it, and actually smile whenever someone says it, because I feel like it suits me better than my boy name.

In terms of choosing my name. I didn't. My mom chose my boy name, and luckily before she died she once told me what she would've named me had I been a girl. I'll never have the chance to ask about my middle name though, but I made an educated guess - my boy middle name is my paternal grandfathers first name. So I just picked my paternal grandmothers first name. Although to be honest I don't actually care for it. My maternal grandmothers first name is better. So, I dunno. For a while I contemplated choosing a middle name that started with my current middle initial, but, I couldn't find any I like. And then there's the option of just picking whatever the hell I like, which has its appeal. But, I tend to be really sentimental, and, as my mom will never have the chance to meet her daughter, and because maintaining nostalgic connections to my family is important to me, I'll probably just go with on of my grandmothers first names as my middle name.

Shana-chan

Quote from: katiej on February 04, 2014, 10:29:01 PMAnother consideration is what you do for a job...or hope to someday.  In corporate America, a unique name on a resume can actually make it more difficult to get interviews.  It shouldn't be that way, but it is.
This is the first I'm hearing of this. Could you explain in more detail?
"Denial will get people no where."
"Don't look to the here & now but rather, to the unknown future & hope on that vs. the here & now."
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Missadventure

Quote from: Shana-chan on February 05, 2014, 01:35:07 AM
This is the first I'm hearing of this. Could you explain in more detail?

I too have never heard that before. In fact, I've always heard the opposite. That a name like "Max Power" will make you stand out and be more memorable in a stack of names than a name like "Joe Smith"

ClaudiaLove

Quote from: missadventure on February 05, 2014, 01:15:45 AM
Yeah. Your name has strong ties to your sense of identity. In many ways we define ourselves by name. Obviously as we transition we're changing our identity (even if only on the surface), so a new name is appropriate. But, it feels strange at first because it's a detachment from the identity we're used to. I know for the first week people started using me girl name I tended to ignore them. Not intentionally. I just was so used to hearing my boy name that I had to hear that for my brain to turn that "they're talking to me" switch on. Then once I trained my brain to switch that on when I hear my girl name I still felt awkward about it for about a week or so, although I don't really know why. But now I'm used to it, and actually smile whenever someone says it, because I feel like it suits me better than my boy name.



I guess that is why I went with  Claudia , as my 'boy' name is Claudiu , and it feels naturally in a way , I feel like I didn't change .
On the other hand , I have many that I want rationally to change towards my past identity , so I would like to get another .
I always liked some girl names more than others , but I don't know if they fit me , and also if I use them I tend to feel kinda fake , like if it is all rising to social standards of having a name instead a real condition of being transgender . It is a battle of concepts  , interests , pleasures and other stuff in my messed up mind.
Anyway , if it is to change Claudia , I would take some Brazilian ones , as I love their culture and style ,or maybe some ' glamour ' ones .
But I hope it will appear fit on me , I hope it won't be annoying /exaggerated . 


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Jill E

#37
For me, I had a LOT of names that i liked. I made sure I liked both the sound and meaning of each. I ended up with a list of like 20 names.

It was also semi important to me to have a name where I could use a longer/shorted version of the name.. It's a little silly, but I've always been really jealous of girls with the name Elizabeth. They can go by Liz, El, Beth, Elissa, etc and they're all super cute names. :-\

I started trying a number of the names, but they didn't really feel like they were me. Eventually I tried Jill/Jillian.

If you have someone to help you try on names, you might see if they're willing to try cute & playful forms as well. :) This helped me reinforce that I was a Jill. Hearing my wife call me Lizzi or El didn't feel right, but hearing her call me  does.


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Androgynous_Machine

Quote from: Shana-chan on January 31, 2014, 07:05:07 PM
Soo, the name you chose to be called. How did you come up with it and what made it stick? How many names did you go though before finding your name and did you ever get tired of that name and or go back to another one? And how long have you been going by that name? Also, did you have people calling you by that name then switched between names you chose and the people that heard the new name, what was their reaction? I am asking because, for me, I can't think of but one name to call myself and whenever I'm called that name, I don't know, it just feels weird and I don't know how else to word it but it does have another feeling to it besides weird, like, it's not my name yet is but I don't know. >_< Maybe it just takes time getting used too? Any advice/help etc. I thank you for in advance.

I asked my mother for a female name.  She chose Sarah Lacey which would have been my name had I been born female.  It only seemed fitting that she named me. . .again.

I haven't pulled the trigger on it.

I do realize this isn't an option for everyone as not everyone's family is as supportive as mine turned out to be.  From what I hear, I'm one of the lucky few.

-AM
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Jill E

Quote from: Androgynous_Machine on February 05, 2014, 10:03:08 AM
I asked my mother for a female name.  She chose Sarah Lacey which would have been my name had I been born female.  It only seemed fitting that she named me. . .again.

I haven't pulled the trigger on it.

I do realize this isn't an option for everyone as not everyone's family is as supportive as mine turned out to be.  From what I hear, I'm one of the lucky few.

Aww. That's super sweet. I had the opposite happen to me. I had already been using Jill as my name for a couple years when I came out to my mom. It was completely awkward. She insisted on having the right to rename me. After declining she became less supportive; we've never really had a close relationship though (thus the awkwardness). My dad & stepmom have been really supportive though. I would have loved for them to name me, had i not already found my name.


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