After 40 years of living woman's life I'd say it's pretty good!  (Sorry girls! LOL!)

Quote from: Northern Jane on March 18, 2014, 04:57:20 PM
After 40 years of living woman's life I'd say it's pretty good!  (Sorry girls! LOL!)

Good for you Jane. Thanks for your help for us newbies. I sure need help crossing over 100%.

Quote from: Joan on March 18, 2014, 05:03:46 AM
Hikari: You seem to have most of it under control, and yes, I know what you mean about the wardrobe! When are you going to go full time?

I had intended it to be about a year from now, I really would rather just go and get it all over with, but I am a very cautious person. I like to know exactly what can go wrong and have the resources in reserve in case they do. Unfortunately I am also a very emotional person, so this becomes like an internal war a bit

To give you an idea of just how slow I tend to move, I didn't really join this site until I had basically decided that I couldn't really be happy without a full physical transition, and that was 4 years ago, and since then I have been working towards the goal of transition and here I am only on HRT lol, not even having had an surgeries done. Now, I did make tons of progress on things I consider prerequisites when I very first joined this site, I was totally codependent, I had no job, no degree, no certifications, no prospects, and had managed to push almost all of my friends away. For me in order to even have a transition I had so much work to do, before I could really start the physical parts of it, but now that the physical parts are here, I know it was worth every minute. That and there is something to be said about transition pushing me to become independent, win back most of my friends, finally make enough money to pay all of my bills, get some self respect, and become happier.

All I can say, is that even though I want things to be over like yesterday, I am already happier than I have really ever been in my life.

Good morning all! And if it wasn't for all that pollution rolling in from China obscuring my view of the mountains, this was be a perfect day in early spring

Teela Renee: Sounds to me like you are there, but then maybe to those of us still on this side see someone  go full time and think that transition is done.

And Joanna, I guess to me what you wrote made me think you are through and on the other side.  I hope the lawsuit falls out in your favour

Northern Jane: Yeah! Goos for you

Reading some of these replies, especially from those who are already full time, kind of maks me wonder, just when is a transition over??

Quote from: Hikari on March 18, 2014, 08:20:36 PM
I had intended it to be about a year from now, I really would rather just go and get it all over with, but I am a very cautious person. I like to know exactly what can go wrong and have the resources in reserve in case they do. Unfortunately I am also a very emotional person, so this becomes like an internal war a bit

To give you an idea of just how slow I tend to move, I didn't really join this site until I had basically decided that I couldn't really be happy without a full physical transition, and that was 4 years ago, and since then I have been working towards the goal of transition and here I am only on HRT lol, not even having had an surgeries done. Now, I did make tons of progress on things I consider prerequisites when I very first joined this site, I was totally codependent, I had no job, no degree, no certifications, no prospects, and had managed to push almost all of my friends away. For me in order to even have a transition I had so much work to do, before I could really start the physical parts of it, but now that the physical parts are here, I know it was worth every minute. That and there is something to be said about transition pushing me to become independent, win back most of my friends, finally make enough money to pay all of my bills, get some self respect, and become happier.

All I can say, is that even though I want things to be over like yesterday, I am already happier than I have really ever been in my life.

Hikaru-san

I'm with you on this completely.  I'm a planner and an evaluator.  I like to look at things from every angle and then make my decision, and I probably think about things too much sometimes.  I'm not sure whether that is better than a slight recklessness about things.  I envy people who are a bit reckless and just get on with things and see how they fall out.

Like you I really think having a good base in place makes transition easier, and it's awesome that you did all that you did in these four years.

Btw 私も女の子ですよ...

Quote from: Joan on March 18, 2014, 08:52:43 PM
Good morning all! And if it wasn't for all that pollution rolling in from China obscuring my view of the mountains, this was be a perfect day in early spring

Teela Renee: Sounds to me like you are there, but then maybe to those of us still on this side see someone  go full time and think that transition is done.

And Joanna, I guess to me what you wrote made me think you are through and on the other side.  I hope the lawsuit falls out in your favour

Northern Jane: Yeah! Goos for you

Reading some of these replies, especially from those who are already full time, kind of maks me wonder, just when is a transition over??

I'm thinking that it's probably never really "over".  We are constantly evolving.  My transition likely ends with me being six feet under.  Hopefully a long time from now.

Well........
I might be a bit odd, but right now the only thing I really care about is getting rid of my male persona.
Right now I'm about 80% there, I still have some family to tell.
I've stopped worring so much on my voice, because it will come in time.
Also, I've stopped worrying if I pass, because I pass in my own eyes, and that helps me be  confident.

Quote from: Joan on March 18, 2014, 08:52:43 PM
Good morning all! And if it wasn't for all that pollution rolling in from China obscuring my view of the mountains, this was be a perfect day in early spring

Teela Renee: Sounds to me like you are there, but then maybe to those of us still on this side see someone  go full time and think that transition is done.

And Joanna, I guess to me what you wrote made me think you are through and on the other side.  I hope the lawsuit falls out in your favour

Northern Jane: Yeah! Goos for you

Reading some of these replies, especially from those who are already full time, kind of maks me wonder, just when is a transition over??

I can see how you could see it that way, but to me transition isnt over till no more mr peepee.

Good question.

6 months on HRT, feel good, some changes for my body, can't wait for more. I want some nice breasts & some hips!

Retired/decent $ so no need about a job.

Hair, damn, some electrolysis for facial hair however so much more to do, it just hurts. Body hair, I hope HRT & time can help.  If not for hair problems I would have lived normal long long ago.

Always a woman, so mentally just fine, It's only a question of changing & improving my body.

Appearance: I'm very passable & live 90% normal female.   Just hate beard/stupid hair/shaving.

So doing all I can I guess.

I could do better. More electrolysis for facial hair. Plastic surgery for a face & neck lift. I need to do both however I just cannot get motivated. Guess I'm hoping for the majic pills that never work.

To me, transition was over the day I went full-time at work. I had to delay my name change for unrelated legal reasons and GRS was a couple years later, but to me those were logistical issues and not defining moments of my transition. (I did work under my female name for the duration, so for all intents and purposes I never presented male again after that day. And what's in my pants was no one's business but mine and my wife's.)

Well, I don't know...it seems that transition might be the lifelong process that Jill and others suggest.  I kind of hope I can leave that feeling behind at some point and forget, for most of the time at least, that I was born physically male.  I really hope that happens some day.

I've made a little bit of progress over the weekend.

Coming out has jumped another 10% or so as I came out to my first friend on Friday night.  It took a few deep breaths to get it out, but then she just said "it doesn't actually seem at all strange", and then suggested we go out shopping together.  Easy-peasy . Well, not exactly but less traumatic than I'd convinced myself it was going to be.

Also I've sen a few people this weekend who I havene't seen since I started HRT, and all of them commented on how different I look, and how much younger I look, so I guess the hormones are having some effect

Quote from: Joan on March 22, 2014, 09:20:12 AM
Well, I don't know...it seems that transition might be the lifelong process that Jill and others suggest.  I kind of hope I can leave that feeling behind at some point and forget, for most of the time at least, that I was born physically male.  I really hope that happens some day.

I've made a little bit of progress over the weekend.

Coming out has jumped another 10% or so as I came out to my first friend on Friday night.  It took a few deep breaths to get it out, but then she just said "it doesn't actually seem at all strange", and then suggested we go out shopping together.  Easy-peasy . Well, not exactly but less traumatic than I'd convinced myself it was going to be.

Also I've sen a few people this weekend who I havene't seen since I started HRT, and all of them commented on how different I look, and how much younger I look, so I guess the hormones are having some effect

I dont think transition is a lifelong process, you cant transition forever at some point you have to end it...I think
anyway glad you re moving forward:) hormones definately do work which we cant see but others can :/


I felt like I should do a detailed post too  dont mind me

Self-acceptance 100%
Well I accept myself completely, Im proud to be trans and I feel ready to walk this path in life, I just wish I had realised sooner...
Also as I accept myself I dont accept looking like a guy , when that changes Im sure I ll feel even better .

Coming out 97%
Well pretty much anyone who socialises with me knows , except random relatives I rarely see and random classmates I rarely speak to,,,I guess they ll know when it becomes more obvious what Im trying to achieve...coming out wasnt easy , but it went better than expected ,,,,

Hair removal  in progress
I ve started laser on my face , stomach ,lower back,,,so far so good I dont even get a beard shadow anymore... I ll see what I ll do with my arms , and I guess hrt should help with leg hair a bit,,,I hope ,,, everything seems to be going well though...

Voice training 0%
I ve given up voice training , not because its too hard or because I cant make a female voice , but because I hate the feeling of having to pretend , to create something unnatural that I dont posses...Id rather be a girl with a fricking low voice than having to stress about it all the time,,,the thing is though that Id love to have my own female voice , so surgery is an option,,,I ve also noticed that the more I hang out with girls the more I speak like them XDXD wierd feeling but I like it , I feel more at peace like that 

Socialisation as female 100% kinda...

I used to really get anxious about that,,,stuff like "i need to go out as a girl" , stress over things I need to do and how others will see me etc etc . I realised something though, Im always socialising as a female , at least on the inside ,,,if others see me as a guy its their fault not mine...
Right now its really wierd cause sometimes people gender me female and some male,,,all im planning to do is be  myself without having to feel that I need to "create" something, if people see my true self then I ll be happy , if not I ll continue being me.
I am me , I see a girl inside me , and no girl has to try to be a girl , thats what Im aiming for here... will be tough I know,,,but I dont really give a damn anymore,,,I ll let things move on.

Hormone changes in progress 15%
Well 3 months and a week on hrt , changes that were expected to happen within this period did happened,,,now im waiting for bigger boobs , less hair , less muscle (my main consern) and a more feminine body and face in general ,,,maybe I ll undergo ffs to make things better but we ll see about that...

Hair 80%
My hair is long now , Id like my hair to be even longer so I need to wait a bit for that,,,Im planning to change colour and style sometime soon,,,
but  they re long enough to enable me pass so thats nice.

Wardrobe replacement 5%
->-bleeped-<- me I need clothes, Im planing to do a major shopping trip both online and offline in a couple of months...

Future employment prospects
Well I have no idea , im 19 I ve never worked before :/
I guess I need to focus on my studies and see what will happen


Overall I ve realised by now that transition isnt an easy progress, needs a ton of patience and inner strenght,,,but as time passes I can see that is worth it,,,worth it a lot...

Self-acceptance 80%
I really know I am a woman and I feel great now that I accepted that. I am not living as the real me yet, not a single day, but I am incorporing my feminine traits into my usual self and I am gradually changing and feeling happier each time. Still, there are several times where I think if I took the right choice, but I know that I must go until the end now, so no coming back.

Coming out 80%
I came out to my mother (but she passed away  ) and my grandparents. I don't need telling any other member of my family, because I rerely see anybody else. I have just a few friends and they don't know yet. I'm pretty sure they won't be my friends anymore after I tell them.

Hair removal 10%
I am just shaving my body hair, but already started facial hair removal with IPL and it is working! Nexrt monday will be my second session, but there are already several missing patches of beard yay

Voice training 30%
I already had several voice training sessions and I can make a fairly female voice, but my phonoaudiologist is not happy because she thinks I am falling into the falsetto range (what I disagree, but...)

Socialisation as female 0%
I never went out as a woman yet...I am quite sure I won't pass, so I only want to go out when I am more ready. I am hoping to do my first attempt at a crossdresser party next saturday

Hormone changes 20-30%?
My skin is softer and translucent. I have considerable breast growth and fat redistribution. My face is looking more feminine...still, I see a lot more to change. I don't know what to expect, but I am approaching the 6 month mark and so far I am quite happy because I am looking totally different from what I was before. With a wig and make-up I can, perhaps, pass a bit.

Hair 30%
I don't cut my hair since January 2013, but my MPB is really in the way. Overall my hair is longer and should have a feminine appearance if it wasn't for my hairline...but HRT is making my hair come back...slowly, but it is returning

Wardrobe replacement 20%
I have a few pairs of underclothes and just one pair of female boots...and I know this is a very unhappy and inapropriate occasion to do it...but as my mother passed away, I took a lot of her clothes for me...mostly are my size...I feel bad because it looks like I am being insensible, but at the same time I feel happy because I'll always have something that was her with me.

Future employment prospects 5%
I am unemployed and finishing graduation.

Will I be able to get a job after my transition? I doubt it...perhaps, but it will be hard...

But perhaps i can live with alternative means of earning money, like robbing or selling my body (KIDDING).

I plan to open a personal business...just don't know what it will be.

Quote from: Joan on March 17, 2014, 08:17:29 AM
The percentage is how far I feel I am to completion.

Self-acceptance 90%
I would love some BA and consider a voice and FFS work, though only BA is a real consideration.

Coming out 100%
Everyone was notified prior to my name change

Hair removal 65%
I have completed laser on my face chest and arm pits. surgery prep is complete. Getting electrolysis on face and other misc areas when it's clear.

Voice training 60%
I need work, others tell me I'm fine.

Socialisation as female 60%
Maybe it's cliche, but I grew up primarily with female influences. I tend to get along with women, and pass freely.

Hormone changes 80%
I personally know enough post ops long term and otherwise to know most of what will happen, already has.

Hair 70%
39 months growth another 24 will maximize is.

Wardrobe replacement 100%
I tossed my old ward robe and have a satisfactory selection for now.

Future employment prospects 100% ?
I am highly licensed and competent in my profession. I can qualify as a premium hire, or a even a diversity hire depending on an employers needs in an industry.

Self-acceptance 100%
I think I fully accepted myself early on, but especially so as voice was getting near 100%.

Coming out 100%
Happily out to everyone. I came out early on and my friends are part of a large social scene so everyone found out pretty much immediately. Parents and whole family all 100% no losses

Hair removal 90%
Still a few hairs close to my nose on my upper lip, but I no longer need to wear cover makeup. I only just recently got to that point... My starting point here should be at a -100% though, haha.

Voice training 100%
I practiced my butt off to find my female voice, but still couldn't use it around people (some kinda stage fright thing). I then had voice surgery and it completely changed my life. Everything kind of fell into place shortly after.

Socialisation as female 100%
This happened early on, and was perhaps one of the most exciting things I've ever experienced!

Hormone changes 80%
I've been on a high dose of pellet HRT, which (according to my endo) I should already be about done feminizing now after 1.5yrs.. But I still think I have a little in me after SRS

Hair 100%
This finished early on, too, because I was lucky enough to not listen to those who told me to cut my hair (my ex & my mom haha) as a guy. Within 3 or so months it was almost shoulder length, and by 8 months it was touching my upper back. Male pattern baldness runs rampant in my family... so I was very lucky to stop that process in its tracks when I did.

Wardrobe replacement 100%
Lots of girlfriends that love bargain shopping = lots of shopping. I have trailed off on the shopping levels quite a bit over the past 4 or 5 months, but I'm feeling the burn bigtime at the moment!

Future employment prospects 100%
I am a freelance graphics animator living in the one place on the planet that has such a high density of motion graphics studios, so my job was already going very well before transition. Ever since transitioning, though, my opportunities have grown, and I feel that my career is in a better place than it's ever been. Apparently companies like a girl who knows how to program & animate? Also I haven't received an email from a client asking for my old name in about a year. Somehow all the companies I've worked for in the past kind of figured it out. I guess having a portfolio website redirect with my new name on it could have had some effect

Self-acceptance 70%
Like Teela, it's not going to be there at the full 100% until SRS. That thing is that gross, foreign, and not okay on me. Won't date, or anything simply because of it. There are not strong enough words for how much I despise, which to dispose it. My heart aches heavily, frequently, multiple times a day that down there is wrong, hurts, isn't right, and needs to be a vagina soon. Not sure how much longer my mind can wait; hopefully fixable early summer 2015, though age 23 sounds too old for that, eek.

Coming out 100%
Everyone knows, and everyone is super, super accepting. Sounds exaggerated, but it's true, and I find myself extremely fortunate, in that regard. I can't think of any one individual I know who isn't, either in my family, at my university (though the vast majority of them just see me as female), or just general pubic.

Hair removal 90% or 0%, depending

A few hairs to the left of my chin still, but that's it. However, I haven't done laser or electro at all, because of costs, but seemingly I started hormones early enough, or how my body responded to them, that I really don't need much more than maybe one electro session. So, it's quite the odd flux of sorts.

Voice training 90%
Not the best, but I'm seen as female upwards of 95% of the time, but again, I couldn't have done voice exercises more than 10 times, in total. Hormones, contrary to everything I know about them, more than doubled my standard voice pitch from 85 Hz to like 205 Hz. I can get it up to like 300 some, according to a post I made early June of last year (and thanks to Jenny's analysis).

Socialisation as female 100%
Awesome sauce! If only I got to do it more, my time is limited with caring for my siblings in a difficult point in my family's life. That said, get me and another girl together, we can laugh, talk about anything, just have a good time. It's like some kind of indescribable connect.

Hormone changes 65%
16 months HRT, on a highish dose of sublingual E. That said, I think there's a bit more to happen, not only after SRS, but because I had really low E for like 4 or 5 months through all this. Not to mention, my face resembles more that of an 18 year old, so there's still the adult look still to be settled in me yet, which is pretty significant in its own right, HRT or not.

Hair 80%
Only this high because I really don't need it long, in order to blend in as another woman. Mine just doesn't grow long, and I can't seem to get it to touch my shoulders, and it's only halfway down my neck as is, though I'm growing it out, as I have been the last 4 years. Kind of like my mom in that sense! Though I blame it being wavy and thick, which means it takes forever, ugh. Makes me sad, too, because this is one of the things I looked forward to most, and it looks like it'll never happen.

Wardrobe replacement 100%
So many pretty clothes now! The worst part is trying to pick out what to wear, there's just so much pretty stuff in this closet of mine! From shoes, to bottoms, to tops, to skirts. Not to mention the shopping, is SO much more fun. I used to shop for my mother growing up, but holy wow, nobody told me it was this fun! Not to mention the exercise I get.

Future employment prospects  83%
Variable, based off what I think unemployment rate would be. Could easily be higher or lower, though it helps I'm female, if only in the case to show they hired me as a woman, for minority outreach reasons, within the firm. Sad but true world, eh? I'm currently an undergrad senior with a double major in finance and French, going to do grad school hopefully starting next spring, in marketing. Got a good brain between these ears, lots of creativity and smarts. I actually think I'll do really well for myself, based on what lots of folks tell me, but the time for that isn't now, though it should be soon.

Self-acceptance 75%
I've made steps but I haven't really fully accepted it.

Coming out 2%
A few online friends I've know for awhile know, that is all.....

Hair removal 15%
I shave my legs, arms and chest that counts right?

Voice training 85%
Been practicing for a few years now, but I don't think its perfect always room for improvement!

Socialization as female 2%
Few places online see me as female.....

Hormone changes 0%


Hair 5%
Dunno about this one, I have a receding hairline - and it hasn't grown out.

Wardrobe replacement 0%
=/

Future employment prospects ??
Not sure here!


Yeah I got  a lot of work still to do..

I'm 5 months into transitioning (over 3 on HRT) and it's going a lot smoother and faster than I had ever imagine. I'm 6-9 months ahead of when I thought I would go full time, but here I am. Financially it's been a little rough, but we've made it through and things are getting better there. So here is my percentages:


Self-acceptance 100%
I've not only accepted it, I've full embraced it and I love who I am and would not change that. (Of course I wish I have been born in a female body, but I still feel lucky to be me.)

Coming out 100%
Everyone knows. I'm out of Facebook and with clients and all my family. 98% approval rating, LOL. The only person that disappointed me, was my father (who my mother divorces when I was 12.)

Hair removal 70%
I've had laser and maybe have one more session left of the face. Electrolysis on the face will continue for some time, but 98% of the facial hair left is white. I still have some body hair, but it's not bad. My back hair is nearly gone and I only have some chest and stomach hair that I have to shave about twice a week, but it's getting lest and less.

Voice training 65%
I've been practicing an using it everyday. For the most part it's androgynous and on the phone, I usually gender male, but sometimes female. In person, it hasn't been an issue as I use lots of hand gestures and with me being 6'7", one might expect a woman of that height with a more androgynous voice.

Socialization as female 100%
Easy one for me as I've always identified more to females than males. In the lesbian community prior to coming out trans I was always considered a lesbian trapped in a male body or an honorary lesbian, LOL. Also I have more female friends (all orientations) than males. That's just the ways it's been my entire life.

Hormone changes 70%
Lot's of changes very quickly. Face is feminine, body shape is (and was somewhat even before HRT.) Only a A-cup but they are still growing. Soft skin and emotional changes are 100% female now.

Hair 75%
It's grown out past my shoulders. My temples are filling in and the once thin top hair is filling in nicely. Started Finasteride in September 2013 and that helped a lot along with HRT.

Wardrobe replacement 20%
Bras and undergarment wise I'm good. Need more tops, pants and shoes. My wardrobe is starting to expand but has a ways to go. My height makes it difficult and I still have some male clothes. I'm keeping a few items (like black pants for business casual the work fine with a feminine top, no one can tell.) With a 36" inseam, if I can reuse something that fits and my feminine butt makes them look feminine, why not use it.

Future employment prospects 90% (nothing is 100% here no matter what gender I present)
I'm self employed and all my clients know and have been accepting. As long as I get the job done, that is all they care about. They even insist I use the women's room. (A very good thing when many of them are trucking companies.)

I've just started the process of name change and I'll get the marker change done the same time as the name change. Need a form filled out by my therapists for DMV and the rest (SS and Passport), I'll need a letter from my doctor.

FP
Come on inside! 
I kind of know what you mean about the socialisation.  I've always managed to hide myself a bit behind a mannish facade but I was always peeking out from behind it.  Joan's getting more courage to show herself every day though

Natalia
I'm really sorry to hear about your mother.  May she rest in peace.
If we keep moving towards our goal and we will reach it in the end.  And the new wig really suits you btw

Missy~rmdlm
This is good solid progress!

JennyGirl
I guess the voice is the only thing that could ever give you away! I'm still not giving up, but I can fly to Seoul in under two hours so I may end up following you to Yeson at some point in the future.

GorJess
You're pretty much there!  Good luck with the job hunting when the time comes

Aina
I guess if you know where you are and you know where you want to get to then you can plan a route from one to other.  That's what I'm telling myself

Sydney_NYC
I'm glad to hear that it's proving easier than you'd expected.  I love what you said about self-acceptance.  I'm not quite there yet, but I hope some day I can be

I'm going to check in here now and then when I feel some progress on something.  It will give me something to keep track of my progress as the months pass.

Yesterday we went out to a mall, and I felt comfortable even in that kind of busy place.  I think I was getting clocked some of the time, but it doesn't bother me that much now.

Anyway, the progress was on voice, and that makes me really happy because I was getting close to giving up.  Talking to shop assistants, to waiters and who knows what else, I finally found I was able to relax enough to find the voice I can sometimes find at home when I'm practicing.  That voice is not too bad, and it didn't sound ridiculous so I'm viewing that as a step forward