Hey all,

In June I will be reaching my one year mark of hrt.  Sure, I wasn't on my current and more effective hrt regiminine the whole time (that started in October) and my first etrogen doseage was pathetic; nonetheless, it's getting closer to a year overall.  I guess that is getting me worried because I'm still waiting for more changes and want to pass better than I do.  My therapist as well as other people keep telling me that I should see more changes and remind me that it's a process, but isn't there a point where we plateau? And am I at that point?  Like all this is as good as it gets?  There are no future improvements to come?  Honestly, I'm really hoping that's not the case because I'll feel so horrible if that is.  I've accepted that I'll never feel or think of myself as pretty, but I would like to think one day I will feel passable and see a woman when looking which I still don't see when looking at myself.  Personally, I still see an andro boy.   While I realize not all of that is hormonal and I can fix much with effort and changing thigs up (both appearance and self esteem wise),  I guess I really hope to have more changes so that I can get passed this awkward andro stage.

In any case, I know hrt can take 3 or 4 years to do everything, but when do we plateau?  Is that around the year mark?

Honestly, from most of the HRT timelines I've seen, the first year is where the appearance goes from that of your birth gender to being more andro/genderqueer, and then it's really in the later part of the second year and beyond that the person really starts looking completely definitively like their identity gender. It was definitely that way with two of the longer-term posters that still linger here, Kiera and Alainaluvsu, as well as numerous HRT timelines. The cheeks really round out in year two, and the feminine features also start rounding out more.

I heard someone said that, on average, by the 1-year mark, only about 50% of the changes are complete. About 85%-90% will be complete by the end of the second year, with changes not really completely finishing and settling into their final permanent shape until 3-5 years. Two of my close friends who are 3+ years in are still reporting that they're getting some additional breast growth and curves. My other friend said that it took her almost 4 years before she really felt like she was completely settled in. Alice, a long-ago transitioner who constantly comments on my Youtube videos, told me that it took about 5 years before she was done.

It's a VERY long process.

You do need to prepare for the possibility that your expectations might be too high, and that you might not be as completely female as you want, but with that said, you are indeed likely to get a lot more feminization from where you are right now. The "andro mode" is very common around the 1-1.5-year mark. There's a reason why people say quite often not to consider FFS until the end of the second year, because that's really the first time that you can definitively start to make assumptions about what you're eventually going to look like.

It depends on your age, like you would have been told many times.
However, in my case it rounded my features a lot.

If you see youtube videos of timelines, you'll see a huge change, but one of the often overlooked things in those timelines is you start grooming yourself as a female would.
Your hair is cut to a female style, even if its just a bobcut. You shape your eyebrows, you get your ears pierced, if they're not already done and you also smile a lot more.

Cis girls take around 10 years to fully develop and that is without fighting "T" at the same time. Like Carrie said "It is a very long process".  Hang in there girl, you will make it!

I have been on hrt for over three years at this point. Things are still changing and my boobs still hurt from growing every now and then, but I don't think I had much change to begin with.

Definitely, I've never seen a trans woman who hasn't changed substantially after the first year.

Hi,

Well im some what different so this may or not apply .

many of my changes started over 20 years ago no meds or surgerys as im intersexed my body was able to go through a few lovely changes, ill say here as iv said on other forums much the same,

hormones were started over 9 years ago , i did not expect much from them in the way of changes, though for some who are younger i would say yes , depends on the person body type meds types of and dose rate,

my body is more as a female with strength i was very strong with no mussle mass as many guys i know ,  i was fit a gymnast and on the move all the time did 100's of  miles bike ridding a week 250  to 300 a week, so even though im over 66 im the same weight now as over 40 years ago . in other words i looked after myself  really good,

between my own hormone changes and a little from synthic meds i have had changes just under 7 years , what you need to remember its not allways the beauty looks its internal ,

yes my face has changed my skin was good before now i would say enhanced ,

yes iv had quite a few surgerys,

What you must remember being intersexed does allow your body to change so i would say iv come a long way in every way,

Sorry im not much help all id say is any where between 3 to 7 years for changes,

mentaly and emotionaly allow 7 years, you will find  little details going on and you may miss them and not even see them remember it works from the inside out,

...noeleena...

A couple of things.

The first thing is that what other people see when they look at you and what you see in the mirror are two different things. You have been looking at yourself for years and an image of yourself as you were previously is burned into your brain, and it takes a very long time to see changes. Others don't have that situation and it allows them to see you differently. I still see a lot of the male me when I look in the mirror, but other people say that I look very femme to them. Who am I to argue?

The second thing is that changes on HRT are very, very slow, but they are still happening. Others have touched on this. For me I tend to go along and not see changes for a period of time and then suddenly there is a girl staring back at me in the mirror. That is happening more and more as HRT slowly does it's work and the male is fading away. I expect the same to begin happening to you some day.

It just takes time.

Daaamn I hope so.  I'd settle for what I have, but OMG pour on the gravy.  I love not wanting to puke every time I look in the mirror anymore.   I mean, I avoided mirrors completely for many years.   I have probably had more mirror time in the last week than I did from 1999 to 2011 when I was this big fat depressed shell of a person.

Thanks everyone!  I've just been pretty down lately about my looks and am sort of feeling hopeless.  Not really because I'm not pretty, though that is upsetting in a big way, but more that I still see myself as someone who looks male. But I guess I need to remind myself that this is a process and I'm still early into it.  I just haven't really been noticing much of anything new happening lately and sometimes worry I may have plateaued early on.  If that's not the case, then I'm a very happy person right now.  Now if only I could get my weight under control, as well as my depression/negative feelings, maybe I'll come out of this okay in the end.  In any case, I look forward to year 2 and hope it will bring further changes.

What Nicole said. It's true that success is 10% inspiration and 90% perspiration. And I'd include HRT in the 10% inspiration. It's much more than HRT alone, as you know.

Quote from: learningtolive on April 11, 2014, 07:21:40 AM
Thanks everyone!  I've just been pretty down lately about my looks and am sort of feeling hopeless.  Not really because I'm not pretty, though that is upsetting in a big way, but more that I still see myself as someone who looks male. But I guess I need to remind myself that this is a process and I'm still early into it.  I just haven't really been noticing much of anything new happening lately and sometimes worry I may have plateaued early on.  If that's not the case, then I'm a very happy person right now.  Now if only I could get my weight under control, as well as my depression/negative feelings, maybe I'll come out of this okay in the end.  In any case, I look forward to year 2 and hope it will bring further changes.

While you are waiting for HRT to do it's work why not put together a "plan of action" for the things that you can control? You already listed a couple - weight loss and negative thinking. It sounds like a great opportunity for you to begin a life long habit of eating better and getting exercise. Don't make it about losing weight so much as learning healthy eating/living habits because the weight will take care of itself if you do that. You could also work on ways to teach yourself to have more positive thoughts and less negative ones; there are books out that might help you with this. I was a negative thinker too; i learned it from my parents as I grew up and it took a bit of work to begin thinking positively - it can be done.

Having a plan and executing it will take your mind off of what HRT is doing; and as you make progress on your plan it will be an encouragement for you.

Quote from: Eva Marie on April 11, 2014, 01:32:45 AM
A couple of things.

The first thing is that what other people see when they look at you and what you see in the mirror are two different things. You have been looking at yourself for years and an image of yourself as you were previously is burned into your brain, and it takes a very long time to see changes. Others don't have that situation and it allows them to see you differently. I still see a lot of the male me when I look in the mirror, but other people say that I look very femme to them. Who am I to argue?

That is so true. Everyone will tell me I'm passing and I'll get ma'am 100% of the time. Yet when I look in the mirror, I keep seeing mostly male about 1/2 the time. However when someone photographs me and I look at the picture, I usually see mostly female.

During my first attempt at transition I felt exactly how you feel, the first year on HRT passed and there didn't appear to be any change. Second year finished and again there seemed to be zero change. Small boobs and nothing else. And yet I was confusing people who met me. Presenting in boy mode people couldn't figure if I was male or female. In girl mode it wasn't a problem. But I couldn't see it myself. Looking back at photos of me from then, even with short hair, I looked like such a girl! But I couldn't see it at the time. That's where I threw in the towel.

HRT will keep working for years and years - it's is an incremental process, there is no magic threshold where you suddenly "look" female. As others have suggested, there are things you can do to help it along the way (weight loss, hair, eyebrows, whatevs) but the major shift that needs to happen, the threshold that needs to be crossed, is in your mind. Once you conquer that you will be able to see yourself as female, body and soul.

Quote from: Eva Marie on April 11, 2014, 08:27:23 AM
While you are waiting for HRT to do it's work why not put together a "plan of action" for the things that you can control? You already listed a couple - weight loss and negative thinking. It sounds like a great opportunity for you to begin a life long habit of eating better and getting exercise. Don't make it about losing weight so much as learning healthy eating/living habits because the weight will take care of itself if you do that. You could also work on ways to teach yourself to have more positive thoughts and less negative ones; there are books out that might help you with this. I was a negative thinker too; i learned it from my parents as I grew up and it took a bit of work to begin thinking positively - it can be done.

Having a plan and executing it will take your mind off of what HRT is doing; and as you make progress on your plan it will be an encouragement for you.

Well, my weight loss plan hasn't been all that healthy.  I've been eating about one meal a day for the past month or so.  I find myself really tired and dizzy at times, but I drink a lot of coffee to make up for it.  And even then, my weight loss plan is going so freaking slow.  It's so frustrating.  As for the positive thinking, I'm trying really hard but I'm really miserable and depressed with life.  I don't know how to explain it.  Like I'm tired of being alive and look forward to going to sleep every day.  It's like the highlight of the day for me.  I'm trying to change it all, but I doubt I'll get passed it as I've struggled with depression forever.  The fact is I feel my life is already over even though I keep trying to save myself and get out of this.  But despite my feeling that I'm fighting a losing battle, I'm not going to quit.  I have to make it through this at some point. I just hate feeling like this.

Quote from: Sydney_NYC on April 11, 2014, 03:51:54 PM
That is so true. Everyone will tell me I'm passing and I'll get ma'am 100% of the time. Yet when I look in the mirror, I keep seeing mostly male about 1/2 the time. However when someone photographs me and I look at the picture, I usually see mostly female.

See the thing is I live quite easily as male.  Sure, I get looks and stares, but I don't think I have as much passing potential as some other people have said.  I live my life.  I see what's around me.  I just don't buy it. Don't get me wrong, I want to.  I just don't.

Quote from: Ms Grace on April 11, 2014, 04:19:06 PM
During my first attempt at transition I felt exactly how you feel, the first year on HRT passed and there didn't appear to be any change. Second year finished and again there seemed to be zero change. Small boobs and nothing else. And yet I was confusing people who met me. Presenting in boy mode people couldn't figure if I was male or female. In girl mode it wasn't a problem. But I couldn't see it myself. Looking back at photos of me from then, even with short hair, I looked like such a girl! But I couldn't see it at the time. That's where I threw in the towel.

HRT will keep working for years and years - it's is an incremental process, there is no magic threshold where you suddenly "look" female. As others have suggested, there are things you can do to help it along the way (weight loss, hair, eyebrows, whatevs) but the major shift that needs to happen, the threshold that needs to be crossed, is in your mind. Once you conquer that you will be able to see yourself as female, body and soul.

Yeah, I don't want to throw in the towel.  This is sort of my last chance, so throwing in the towel can only mean one thing.  I just honestly don't know how to make it past that mental barrier and if that will ever be possible.   Really, what changed this time around for you?  how did you get that piece of mind?  Like everyone says confidence is key and that makes sense, but I don't know how to be confident and acquire it.  I guess I want to know how to get that mentality myself and honestly I have no idea at this time.

In any event, thanks everyone.  I kind of have some hope considering that things will keep changing.  Maybe things will get better as I'm still early in the hrt game and I'll keep moving forward.  I'm just sort of in a bad mood and had a long miserable day at work, so I'm not the most positive person at the moment.  Thank you though everyone for giving me some hope that the changes will continue and for offering helpful adivice.  I do appreciate it.

Encouraging thread here for me.  I have been worried about the same thing.

Weight tip- 2000 calories 4 days a week, 2 days back to back at 1500 cals, and one day to eat whatever I want within reason.  Lost 35 lbs from 173 down to 138 and at 5'9, looks nice, took about a year.  Now I stay at 2000 daily.  If I binge I just correct the counts the next morning.  An easy, healthy and slow and steady weight loss plan.   Gotta be careful with those diets.

From personal experience and having in mind everyone is different, no , you're nowhere near the plateau yet, particularly if your dosing was low the first months, I had the biggest and best changes on the second year of HRT, personally I feel I hit that point a the 2-2 and a half years point... Then you can make all your considerations to enhancing surgeries, etc.

Yes!! 4+ years now and still seeing changes, albeit very subtle and gradual.

Quote from: Satinjoy on April 11, 2014, 10:12:13 PM
Encouraging thread here for me.  I have been worried about the same thing.

Weight tip- 2000 calories 4 days a week, 2 days back to back at 1500 cals, and one day to eat whatever I want within reason.  Lost 35 lbs from 173 down to 138 and at 5'9, looks nice, took about a year.  Now I stay at 2000 daily.  If I binge I just correct the counts the next morning.  An easy, healthy and slow and steady weight loss plan.   Gotta be careful with those diets.

Yea, my weight loss plan isn't really the healthiest.  I skip eating all day and sort of binge at night.  2000 calories a day though is way too much for me.  I mean I could easily eat it, but it would screw me up.  I aim for 800-1,000 calories on a good day.  I should mention I'm still not losing weight at a fast pace, so it's not like it's working, lol.

Quote from: calicarly on April 13, 2014, 08:01:24 AM
From personal experience and having in mind everyone is different, no , you're nowhere near the plateau yet, particularly if your dosing was low the first months, I had the biggest and best changes on the second year of HRT, personally I feel I hit that point a the 2-2 and a half years point... Then you can make all your considerations to enhancing surgeries, etc.

That's good to know.  I guess I'm being a bit hasty in judging myself so early.   I just want to be at that point already, ya know?

Quote from: Jenna Marie on April 13, 2014, 09:03:32 AM
Yes!! 4+ years now and still seeing changes, albeit very subtle and gradual.

4 years of hrt is a long way to go for me, but it's nice to know that the changes can continue past the first year.

Please don't starve yourself when dieting, it's actually counter productive and not sustainable.

About 2 years ago I got diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes, at that time I did not know much about nutrition, food or metabolism but as a part of treating my diabetes I was assigned a dietician and had to read up on how the body processes energy.

There are two sources of energy for our body, fat/oil and carbohydrates. If you watch your consumption of those two things everything will fall into place and you will be able to loos weight and keep it off. You can eat as much vegetables meat as you want meaning that you don't have to go hungry, if fact the main thing that makes you feel full and staves off hunger is fiber, It you have a bowl of high fiber cereal it will keep you full for 4-6 hours.

If you keep your carbohydrate consumption below 45gr per meal and stay away fro fatty/oily things you should lose weight, if you can exercise for 30 minutes every day that also helps tons, the secret is that if you are active for 30 minutes your body will burn more all day long so it's not just about the energy that you burn by exercising.

Starving yourself by eating one big meal actually makes your body go into "energy conservation mode" which is the exact opposite of what you want, eat more often and less at a time.