I'm scared and here's why. I'm at the point where I have come out to literally everybody I know and I feel I've been making good progress in my transition. Here's the problem. I've started passing while still in guy mode which may seem like a good thing, but here's the problem. I haven't worked on my voice. I'll walk up to the register at a store and they'll say, "will that be all ma'am," but I don't know what to say. If I talk back, either it sounds like I'm whispering, or I sound like a guy and they get confused as hell and every one in the line goes silent and stare like they're ->-bleeped-<-ing body snatchers in some horror movie. And if I just nod and smile, I seem like a bitch. The nodding and smiling works and they gender me as female, but I can tell they think I'm an ->-bleeped-<-.
        I just don't know what to do. I know I should have started working on my voice earlier, because this is just awkward. Like having kids stare at you while you are talking to friends because they're confused. It's just so weird and makes me uncomfortable. I used to hate going out because I would get gendered male, but now that I get gendered female, it's become really awkward to go out. For example, I was out with my friend and having a good time at Starbucks, but as soon as I open my mouth, the stares begin. And they don't stop. It's like the whole time everybody keeps shooting glances at me. Even if I stare back at them they don't stop. It's like I'm some science experiment and they are all trying to figure me out. What frustrates me is that I came out to my entire highschool and literally everybody has been super supportive, but as soon as I step into the "real world" people get their panties all up in a bunch. This is all soooooo freaking frustrating. What do I do while I'm working on my voice? I want to ignore them but it's so hard and I can't just stop talking.

I was sitting at my regular Starbucks and two transgender women came in and sat down and proceeded to have a conversation that lasted at least three hours. They looked quite female but they made no effort to conceal their very male voices. I thought it pretty interesting. I can do a little a  female voice when dealing with cashiers I don't know my attitude is that if your only getting notice when you open your mouth that's doing pretty good.

This why I always tell transitioners to work on their voice.  It really can make or break you and I reckon a large part of my passibilty is due to my voice.

Just practice, practice, practice. Expect it to take 6 months before it starts to work well. NEVER use your male voice or it undoes all your hard work.

It can be done just never give up. I do not look all that passable IMO but I never get misgendered and I am certain that is due to my voice. It took nearly 6 months to get it sounding natural and it took lots of practice.  It got easier when I went fulltime but I got to use my female voice 24/7.

In some ways I am grateful to those that make no effort to change their voice because thanks to them - as far as Joe Public is concerned - any women with a man's voice is MTF whereas any woman with a non-male voice, no matter how bad, must be a woman. I cannot understand why some people make no effort.

Just keep practising and it will all work itself out in the end.

 Singing in your car is great tool and you turn off the doubt monster and enjoy it ( rock out in your girl voice )Watch some utube videos theres a lot great tricks .Relax /work on it and you will be having that sing songy voice .AKA Sara 

Quote from: provizora4 on April 27, 2014, 06:01:10 PM
This why I always tell transitioners to work on their voice.  It really can make or break you and I reckon a large part of my passibilty is due to my voice.

Just practice, practice, practice. Expect it to take 6 months before it starts to work well. NEVER use your male voice or it undoes all your hard work.

It can be done just never give up. I do not look all that passable IMO but I never get misgendered and I am certain that is due to my voice. It took nearly 6 months to get it sounding natural and it took lots of practice.  It got easier when I went fulltime but I got to use my female voice 24/7.

In some ways I am grateful to those that make no effort to change their voice because thanks to them - as far as Joe Public is concerned - any women with a man's voice is MTF whereas any woman with a non-male voice, no matter how bad, must be a woman. I cannot understand why some people make no effort.

Just keep practising and it will all work itself out in the end.

Yeah. I wish I could practice often. It's just that my parents aren't keen on hearing it in the house and I don't have much time to go out and practice thanks to school.

Just remember that it's an innate response,  it's natural to try and gender someone ;it some from caveman times when it was important to tell the difference between men (potential threat) and women.  They are instinctively curious but that is all,  and are not necessarily judging.  This phase passes quickly particularly it ur already being read as female.

Quote from: provizora4 on April 27, 2014, 06:01:10 PM
It can be done just never give up. I do not look all that passable IMO but I never get misgendered and I am certain that is due to my voice. It took nearly 6 months to get it sounding natural and it took lots of practice.

Did you use any voice program in particular or did you just do it on your own?  I am just starting my journey, and want to get started on my voice early because of all of the reasons that you stated.  I know it takes a lot of work to get it perfected and is so important in being convincing.  I have been close to buying a couple of the online programs, but don't know which ones are good.  The price isn't a hang up, I just hate being ripped off.  I have looked for voice coaches in my area, but there are none that I have found that do this

Quote from: AMDERS on April 27, 2014, 07:15:52 PM
Yeah. I wish I could practice often. It's just that my parents aren't keen on hearing it in the house and I don't have much time to go out and practice thanks to school.

What I did when I was starting out with my voice, was to just take my male speaking voice and just force the pitch up little by little. Then I worked on my inflections and intonations until my voice sounded as natural as it did before. I did it pretty gradually so that there was never any one moment where my voice changed dramatically. It did help that I always had a relatively high voice to begin with (I hardly even have an adam's apple), but I think it's still a good approach for anyone starting out. But I second what provizora said, never revert to your male voice. The best way to perfect your voice is to never give yourself the option of not using it. Then you pretty much have to keep working on it if you don't want to sound weird. And try not to worry too much about what your parents think. If you keep the changes you're making gradual, they may not even notice what you're doing until you've already made a lot of progress.