Susan's Place Logo

News:

According to Google Analytics 25,259,719 users made visits accounting for 140,758,117 Pageviews since December 2006

Main Menu

Struggling to connect.

Started by WaspWoman, June 04, 2014, 01:30:23 AM

Previous topic - Next topic

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Jessica Merriman

Quote from: WaspWoman on June 04, 2014, 01:51:58 PM
I appreciate everyone's replies and will take all of your advice to heart, but this actually wasn't what I was looking for with this thread. I was really looking for opinions on the prospects of a fruitful, albeit lonely, transition without being socially successful; though with the direction the responses it seems it doesn't look good.
I am not trying to bring you down with what comes next. The prospects of a good transition by yourself is not very good at all. For one thing support is crucial from personal support to socialization. If you go as far as SRS you will have to have others around you to help you because of the long healing process. You will need help with daily activities for a while as you will not be able to do them by yourself. I personally do not know anyone who had FFS, SRS, Breast Augmentation, etc. who had the procedures and cleaned the house the next day, cooked, shopped, etc. Transition is just something you will need help with to complete. Some (not all) Therapist's will not give letters for SRS until they see you can function in society as your target gender. I am not trying to be a downer, just letting you know you cannot do transition alone.  :)
  •  

Jill F

Quote from: Jessica Merriman on June 05, 2014, 12:59:02 AM
I am not trying to bring you down with what comes next. The prospects of a good transition by yourself is not very good at all. For one thing support is crucial from personal support to socialization. If you go as far as SRS you will have to have others around you to help you because of the long healing process. You will need help with daily activities for a while as you will not be able to do them by yourself. I personally do not know anyone who had FFS, SRS, Breast Augmentation, etc. who had the procedures and cleaned the house the next day, cooked, shopped, etc. Transition is just something you will need help with to complete. Some (not all) Therapist's will not give letters for SRS until they see you can function in society as your target gender. I am not trying to be a downer, just letting you know you cannot do transition alone.  :)

This is so true.  I think this needs to be its own topic.  The more support you can find, the better off you are.  Even if one never transitions, this still holds true.
  •  

Sammy

Quote from: Jessica Merriman on June 05, 2014, 12:59:02 AM
I am not trying to bring you down with what comes next. The prospects of a good transition by yourself is not very good at all. For one thing support is crucial from personal support to socialization. If you go as far as SRS you will have to have others around you to help you because of the long healing process. You will need help with daily activities for a while as you will not be able to do them by yourself. I personally do not know anyone who had FFS, SRS, Breast Augmentation, etc. who had the procedures and cleaned the house the next day, cooked, shopped, etc. Transition is just something you will need help with to complete. Some (not all) Therapist's will not give letters for SRS until they see you can function in society as your target gender. I am not trying to be a downer, just letting you know you cannot do transition alone.  :)

Seriously, but apart of purely practicaly/technical stuff, where is the issue? I believe, if a person is quite self-sufficient and able to lead some sort of autonomous life, then there should not be any issues with transition either. I am one year into it, I have kept my daugther, my job and professional contacts. I have lost my partner, my extremely wide social circle of acquaintances and "kinda-friends", and apart of my best female friend, best male friend and my boss, no other person would support me - heck, even my own mother refuses to switch pronouns and call me Emily. Now, I see a lot of pretty and confident women around here, and they lead solitary lives, so there is not really a reason to believe that things in my case might be the other way. They dont go outside clubbing and dating, so why should I?  I can just as well dedicate myself to my kid and job, which would not expand the social life component, but would maintain the sanity :D.
  •  

Ms Grace

There's a difference between being alone and being lonely. In the first case it is possible to be quite happy and content despite having no one around you. The problem is when one feels lonely, it can become a soul crushing feeling of alienation and disconnection. Even when surrounded by people one can feel lonely. No person is an island unto themself, no matter how independent there are elements to transition (like surgery) where being alone is inadvisable if not impossible. But like you say Emily, there is a lot one can still accomplish when alone if being alone doesn't bother you. Being lonely though, that's a different kettle of fish!
Grace
----------------------------------------------
Transition 1.0 (Julie): HRT 1989-91
Self-denial: 1991-2013
Transition 2.0 (Grace): HRT June 24 2013
Full-time: March 24, 2014 :D
  •