It was a mistake giving my wife access to my account. Might have been OK if things would have worked out better, but now not so much. I will have to keep it mellow until I know if she figures it out. Things are bad right now.  Worse than last time. I just need some hugs and encouragement I right now. I am super depressed right now and don't know what to do.

Norma Lynne

 

HUGS!!!!!!

Jen

I'm keeping my fingers crossed that everything goes well and you both figure things out. I'll have you in my prayers, good luck!

Here's huuuuugggge cyber hugs!

Please know that my heart goes out to you, and that I sincerely hope things will work out.

Best wishes!

Allie

Hugs doll! hang in there things are upside down for me too lets keep pushing we can do it

Hugs, I hope it works out.

This sucks. I love her so much. But once I'm gone its over. In my opinion if she let's me go. No matter what I can't take her back. This rips my heart in 2. I feel like I did when my mom died. The funny thing is that transition is not the main reason why we are separating. Its part. But not even 25% if it yet. Maybe once I start hrt. But not now.

I am so sorry, sis.  Hugs, and prayers for you, and for her.

KatrinaLynn

I really hope that it works out for both of you.  When you love someone as much as you obviously do, it hurts that much more when you are rejected or hurt.

I ran into heavy weather when I shared a lot very early in my journey.  It was almost terminal as I didn't really understand what was happening or where I was going and my wife really wanted reassurance and more certainty than I could provide.  It caused a power shift in our relationship and I found myself on the back foot.  It proved quite difficult to recover but we now seem to be stronger than before my transition started.

Along the way I have drawn a line in the sand twice - the first with needing respect and the second to be feeling/seeing her love.  If she had decided to step back or continued to withhold herself but share her criticism then it really would have been all over.  It was a high risk strategy and it worked, but it could so easily have gone the other way.   

As time has passed I am becoming a little less impatient, less easily frustrated and am less easily hurt.  My journey has been hard for her, for me and for us.  She has had to reassess what is important to her and her view of the person she married.  She didn't ask for this journey but has had to deal with it.

I wish you and your wife all the very best.

Aisla

Quote from: Aisla on June 15, 2014, 11:53:26 PM
KatrinaLynn

I really hope that it works out for both of you.  When you love someone as much as you obviously do, it hurts that much more when you are rejected or hurt.

I ran into heavy weather when I shared a lot very early in my journey.  It was almost terminal as I didn't really understand what was happening or where I was going and my wife really wanted reassurance and more certainty than I could provide.  It caused a power shift in our relationship and I found myself on the back foot.  It proved quite difficult to recover but we now seem to be stronger than before my transition started.

Along the way I have drawn a line in the sand twice - the first with needing respect and the second to be feeling/seeing her love.  If she had decided to step back or continued to withhold herself but share her criticism then it really would have been all over.  It was a high risk strategy and it worked, but it could so easily have gone the other way.   

As time has passed I am becoming a little less impatient, less easily frustrated and am less easily hurt.  My journey has been hard for her, for me and for us.  She has had to reassess what is important to her and her view of the person she married.  She didn't ask for this journey but has had to deal with it.

I wish you and your wife all the very best.

Aisla

Wow! Sounds a lot like me. I would love to talk more. But can't pm on this account yet. Would it be OK to pm you on my other account? I have been through a divorce so I am recognizing some of the vibes. I am starting to feel she is at the I love you but I am not in love with you faze. I have a lot of work in front of me if I am going to try and fix this any advise would be appreciated. Or just someone to bounce my feelings off of. I know what I want just don't know how to get there safely.

PM any time. May be a delay due to different time zones!   Won't necessarily have answers but can listen , make suggestions and share my experience.   A lot will depend upon your history, shared dreams and mutual commitment.

The SO threads contain some very powerful discussions and insight into their experience and perspective.  Sometimes just walking in their shoes helps you apply a different lens.

Aisla

Transition is the only reason my wife and I are going to divorce.. and its so hard.
It's a process.. therapy can help.. I also started taking anti depressants while the process plays out.. seems to help a little.
Hang in there...
Carrie