Where I feel the opposite of a girl and this is one part of me that I know is easier for me. My dad who died a little over 9 months ago is someone where my mind when I think of him or he comes out in my personality that I act like a guy and VERY like a guy and is well rare in me but I dont feel weird being a guy like that. That's where I dont have the struggle and can have peace more. Other than where Im comfortable being a guy, I have lots of struggle with the girl vs. boy in me. I dont know if this makes sense. This and a few other reasons is why I wont transition fully ever but aside from all my struggles like I see girls and think why not me to but when my dad comes out in me, I dont feel transgender at all. Does this all make sense at all? I struggle with knowing Im a girl mentally more than a boy in lots of ways but Im happy when the struggle doesnt show up. Im still doing stuff to me without hrt or anything like that to bring some of the girl out in my face and body and all. I am trans but Im glad when I dont feel trans. Weird or normal? Does this sound odd??

No Larisa1983: It dont sound weird or odd to me, i myself struggle too with both traits fighting inside of me. I'm just finding all this out and and trying to find a therapist  around my area to help me understand more. My mind is more Male then Female but physically Female but i dislike that part of me. I hope this helps in some way u r not alone u r like others that need to find the person u r truly.

Its tough for me as I know who I am. I do NOT get guys alot and like today for example I am still trying for to get rid of this gut but like a guy, they say oh dont worry about it. I really want a toned tummy and Ive told my mom about this. I showed kendra wilkinsons tummy on google and told her I want that, not big bulky arms. She got it but guys think I have to bulk up. I dont want to have a 220 pound body. I weight 160 and want to be around 145 or 140. Ive weighted in at 145 before. It's not easy being trans and my mom doesn't know Im trans but has seen me show many girly perspectives before. Ive seen I understand girls better than most guys I know. I consider me having a brain that is way more girl than boy a gift that many guys would love to have. Ive seen guys just make fools out of themselves not understanding girls and me just sitting back thinking, girls are so easy to understand. For example, a girl a friend noticed how much more sensitive my emotions are. Ive always had emotions more closer to girls than guys. I could go on forever with example after example how I dont mix with guys and my brain is so much more closer to girls.