There is a subtle difference but pretty important. I have my own opinions about it, what are yours?

Neither honestly. It was (and is) more about personal comfort.

I did it for survival plain and simple. My recent physical exams, labs, etc. prove conclusively my body is working and functioning much better.

I transitioned because I figured out that it was going to be necessary for my survival and I didn't feel like I was ready to be pushing up daisies just yet.

I felt like I was presented with 3 options: continue going crazy, die or give transitioning a shot.  I was miserable and needed relief one way or the other.

Loving myself or not wasn't really a factor in that equation.  I didn't love nor hate myself before, nor did I know how I'd feel after transitioning.  All I knew was that it was likely going to be my best shot at living some semblance of a happy life and that option needed explored.

I used to merely exist, now I am living.

Hey, it worked...

Quote from: Jill F on June 17, 2014, 07:01:19 PM
I transitioned because I figured out that it was going to be necessary for my survival and I didn't feel like I was ready to be pushing up daisies just yet.

I felt like I was presented with 3 options: continue going crazy, die or give transitioning a shot.  I was miserable and needed relief one way or the other.

Loving myself or not wasn't really a factor in that equation.  I didn't love nor hate myself before, nor did I know how I'd feel after transitioning.  All I knew was that it was likely going to be my best shot at living some semblance of a happy life and that option needed explored.

I used to merely exist, now I am living.

Hey, it worked...

It seems like it worked because you seem very laid back and happy, to the point I can't even see you being sad like that. So kudos for finding aproblem and fixing it!

What Abby said it was/is about feeling comfortable with myself. But for me it is also about being happy when I look at myself. I spent a long time (for me) just being "ok" with every aspect of my life which is how I thought I could make it thru this world. I couldnt. I wanted to be better than that. So transition was that for me. My chance to attempt being better than "ok". So far so good on the happiness front.

This is who I am and always was. That fake, useless pile of fecal matter I paraded around as was the public opprobrium, not who I am today. Enough said.

I transitioned for survival and because I needed to love myself. Before I accepted who I was and began transitioning I was going through a total mental breakdown several suicide attempts and was hospitalized four times in a psych ward over the course of five months. I hated myself on a very deep level and didn't understand/ couldn't accept the reason why. Now two years later it is like night and day I didn't realize before that it was possible to be this happy in life.

just to stay alive and not fall a couple thousand feet from a top of my apartment building

Wow. So it seems for many it was a matter of self preservation. For me it was never about admonishing what I was as a male or the necessity to survive. For me, it is - because - I love myself that I wanted to transcend. I find beauty trumps handsomeness and I wanted to elevate to the more fragile and graceful version of me. I guess it's an odd self idealized way for me to become more fiercely protective of myself because of this recognized beauty and vulnerability.

In that sense my answer would be yes, I am transitioning *because* I love myself so much.

I can't see doing anything that would put me in harms way. That's why I'm probably too pure. Maybe too much for my own good.

I'm transitioning because I want to be happy with myself. I hate the body I'm in for many different reasons and I know what I need to do to change that.

There are parts of myself that I love, and I am sculpting those in such a way that they don't get lost with transition, like the fact that I LOVE my butt, I don't want it to get smaller because I love being a guy with a big behind. I like being pretty (to those who consider me such) and I love the fact that being on testosterone hasn't changed that, I'm just a pretty guy instead of a pretty girl now.

I hate my body shape, the sexual organs inside of me, my breasts and my genetic disposition to weight issues and muscle degradation. I want to love my body so part of my transition is toning up and fighting the fat monster to prove to myself and my family that I can beat our genetics to some extent.

I've just been this way since at least 4. for  me it's not a question of a prettier self it's more a question of a genetically valid self

For me: neither. Originally I planned to start my transition on this January but since I literally fell apart at the end of the last October (serious sleep deprivation, mental anorexia, mild collapses) I simply couldn't handle it anymore and got an appointment with a therapist 8 weeks ahead of planned start.

After the first appointment several of my previous health problems (which are now listed as of psychogenic origins in my medical report) disappeared: epilepsy, serious digestion issues, circulatory problems... Just two weeks after later I got a clean bill of health with nearly perfect blood tests. Just from that I knew I'm doing the right thing for myself.

I'm asperger so for me it wasn't a question of love or to be beautiful but to finally fix constant depressions and align my body with my female brain which for me doesn't have to include physical beauty. And since the first puberty left me with a rather feminine body type and almost no masculine features the only parts I couldn't withstand is the mess between my legs (I still can't withstand that), body hair (now fixed), facial hair (5th laser depilation next Wednesday) and missing hair (partially fixed).

Although I have to say that thanks to estrogens I started to love myself and gradually be able feel and even express emotions. Not to mention I started to enjoy the life. That was a real surprise to me not to mention what a huge surprise it was for my mother as she was used to me being like a block of ice. I guess I'm not such an extreme asperger case after all. Still my scientific part is more powerful than before as it's no longer distracted :-) .

Both.

Taking time to take care of myself was a hard thing for me to learn how to do. Loving myself gave me the strength to press on until I reached lesson learned.

As for wanting to love myself, I wanted to put bottles of alcohol I didn't want but that were still in my hand down and I wanted a chance to hold on to whom I hold most dear. I don't know what would have happened if I had failed, but I don't think I would have liked myself very much.

I didn't really do it out of any feelings of love, but I do realize now that I actually love my body for the first time in my life and this is something that brings me much comfort.

I transitioned because I was tired of hating myself.

And well, I still hate myself a lot, but at least it's not because I look like some unfixably-masculine overweight hairy beast anymore. At least I'm able to smile at my reflection sometimes now, where I never could before.

Because I wanted to love myself. Because I wanted to be myself.

I transitioned because I love myself and deserve to be happy.

To survive; I was another who lived on the edge of existence with no will to keep crawling.

HRT allowed me to live and to be me.

SRS will finally allow my body to match my brain.

I am just starting to transition after trying to commit suicide not giving a crap about what I was eating being in my room 24 seven depressed I finally said ->-bleeped-<- it with the changes in the insurance I cannot be denied for hormones and hopefully soon SRS as well no one else's living my body why am I living for Other ->-bleeped-<-s