Hi Everyone,
I finally think I understand who I am, after a very confusing 37 years of not having a clue, but I would be interested on what your opinions are on whether I am right?.....
I have always been very uncomfortable with being called a man, as I truley do not feel I am. I have a penis etc but do not feel that this defines me as a person. I have identified as a gay man since I was in my teens as this felt the best fit for me, but apart from being sexually attracted to men, I don't feel I really fit into the male part of being a gay male. I love wearing make up and high heel shoes, but not to look like a woman, just to look like me (I unfortunately don't wear the shoe in public and tone the make up right down when I go out

). I love the look of tailored suits with high heel boots, but this is not a sexual love, nor is it to look like a woman, I just like the look. I also like to wear masculine clothes as well, like a nice suit and tie and shoes or a tight vest and jeans. again it's just what I like.
For many years I believed I was transgender. This was because of my complete revolution of being classed as male and my ability to connect to my femininity, but to class myself as a woman dosen't really fit either. I don't want womens genitals, I'm quite happy with what I have, but just as long as they don't define who I am.
I was watching you tube this evening and was watching some dancers that would be classed as male, but wore heels and make up with masculine clothing and I looked at it and then realised that maybe the label I have been searching for doesn't exist. Maybe I am not a man or a woman, but a mixutre of both and neither of them at the same time (if that makes sense)
How do I feel now? I feel quite releived to be honest. I really feel I know who I am, and that's me. if they had an "other" section on a form were it states man or woman, I know that is the box I would tick.
I am attracted to men and can relate to men and to women and feel I have certain trates of both, such as a feminine compassion and understanding side but a male sexual side, but again neither of these really seem to fit into either a typical man or a woman
I welcome your thoughts.....
Thanks