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What's your opinion on transgender children?

Started by androgynouspainter26, July 01, 2014, 12:57:41 AM

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traci_k

I think it's great that today many more parents are open minded about the differences trans kids feel and allow them to socially transition early. Allowing blockers before puberty and HRT when age appropriate and after having lived most of their life RLE, SRS when they are ready. I knew I was different growing up in the 60's, but at that time Christine Jorgenson was an oddity and homosexuality was still a mental disorder. One didn't tell your parents that you were really the opposite gender. You just went to sleep praying to God you would wake up in the right body and gender the next day.

I believe many suicides will be prevented.
Traci Melissa Knight
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LeftistLeslie

Quote from: androgynouspainter26 on July 01, 2014, 12:57:41 AM
This is a very hot issue right now, and I thought it might be interesting to start a conversation on the topic, and see what everyone here thinks!

Personally, I have mixed feelings on the subject.  I'm absolutely in support of using blockers once someone in their early teens, and I don't have any doubts that they should absolutely be able to transition-I knew I was trans* when I was fourteen or so, and starting then would have made my life so much better.  Where I start to hesitate is when I hear about children who are twelve, nine, six, even three, who are already transitioning.

I don't think there's any doubt at all that a child that age can know if they are male or female identified-I'm pretty sure we all knew SOMETHING then-but can they understand the implications of being transgender?  That they'll probably need to undergo painful and expensive surgery to feel complete and fit in, and even then might not feel right with their bodies?  The bullying and isolation they could face, just for being themselves?  Even if a child understands who and what they are, I just can't imagine them understanding the challenges that they'll face.  Besides, social transition is almost as permanent as surgery, and there's a huge difference between wearing the clothing one likes and actually taking on a new gender!  I know for certain that if my parents have encouraged me to live as myself myself at that age, I wouldn't have survived a year.  I'm certainly passionately not for or against anything, but I think it's worth asking if these kids can really understand at that age what they're getting into.  Thoughts?  No flame wars, please!

Its Opposite day!

Personally I have mixed feelings on the subject of cisgender children. I'm absolutely in support of not using blockers for someone in their early teens, and I don't have any doubts that they should absolutely be able to not transition-I knew I was cis when I was fourteen or so, and starting then would have made my life so much better.  Where I start to hesitate is when I hear about children who are twelve, nine, six, even three, who aren't even transitioning.

I don't think there's any doubt at all that a child that age can know if they are male or female identified-I'm pretty sure we all knew SOMETHING then-but can they understand the implications of being cisgender?  That they won't even have the opportunity to get surgery to feel complete and fit in, and then might not feel right with their bodies?  The bullying and isolation they could face, just for being themselves?  Even if a child understands who and what they are, I just can't imagine them understanding the challenges that they'll face.  Besides, failing to transition early is almost as permanent as surgery, and there's a huge difference between wearing the clothing one likes and actually staying in ones gender!  I know for certain that if my parents hadn't encouraged me to live as myself myself at that age, I wouldn't have survived a year.  I'm certainly passionately not for or against anything, but I think it's worth asking if these kids can really understand at that age what they're getting into.  Thoughts?  No flame wars, please!
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LeftistLeslie

Quote from: solexander on July 28, 2014, 01:10:52 PM
My opinion on trans children is that... I'm really jealous of them? I started transition at 16, which is certainly early, but I would've given nearly anything to be this happy earlier on. I really mourn the childhood I could've had as the correct gender- I missed out on so many formative years that I could've spent being really really happy instead of confused, depressed, and suicidal. I'm really happy for trans children, and also really really REALLY jealous of them.
I feel the same way! I want a girlhood. You can have the stupid baseball games I was forced to play or the ribbing to toughen me up.
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Allyda

Quote from: LeftistLeslie on July 28, 2014, 03:29:23 PM
I feel the same way! I want a girlhood. You can have the stupid baseball games I was forced to play or the ribbing to toughen me up.
So eloquently well said!^^___^^. Especially the ribbing and insults to "toughen me up." part!

Allie :icon_flower:
Allyda
Full Time August 2009
HRT Dec 27 2013
VFS [ ? ]
FFS [ ? ]
SRS Spring 2015



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Miss_Bungle1991

Meh...I'm never going to have the girlhood that I wanted, so...screw it. I'm not going to waste my time thinking about it. It is what it is and wasn't what it wasn't.
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pianoforte

There are a lot of things I would change about my childhood, but that's a totally different subject...

I feel like trans kids should be allowed to take blockers, and even to begin HRT as teens (at a puberty-appropriate age). Maybe getting a recommendation for HRT should be a more rigorous process for teens than adults, but not impossible.

Kids who go through puberty with HRT and then later experience a shift in their gender identity... well, they'll be kind of like those of us who found our identities/began transition later in life. It will make it harder to transition "back" if that becomes a necessity... but it seems like that would very much be a statistical anomaly, and even in rare cases where that happens it would be possible! This community can attest to the fact that it is possible to transition later in life, so I do not see a harm in transitioning (with HRT, but not yet surgery) at or around the time of natural puberty.
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androgynouspainter26

All of this is spot on.  I would have killed for the chance to transition earlier.  I knew I had to transition a few months into my fifteenth year, and I had to wait three more simply because of the way we structure this system.  It's appalling.  However, I will say that I do wonder if it's right to encourage a child as young as three or five to transition-there are plenty of gender-nonconforming children out there, and not all of them will need to transition.  I fully support letting them wear what they'd like to wear and so on, but changing names, committing to live as another gender at such a young age?  I don't know if I can get behind that.  Kids don't understand how unkind our culture is to transgender people, and while in a perfect world that wouldn't matter, I know that personally, if I had come out as trans* while I was still in school, I would have been killed-literally.  And also, social transition is in no way easily reversible-the ideal solution in my mind is not to impose gender on children at all.  Let them play with the toys they want to play with, act the way they want to act and dress the way they want to dress.  For many, everything else is just a symptom.
My gender problem isn't half as bad as society's.  Although mine is still pretty bad.
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Allyda

Quote from: androgynouspainter26 on July 30, 2014, 11:29:25 PM
the ideal solution in my mind is not to impose gender on children at all.  Let them play with the toys they want to play with, act the way they want to act and dress the way they want to dress.  For many, everything else is just a symptom.
During my early years on the reservation I'm from until I lost her, my biological Mom did just this with me ^^___^^. I identified as a girl and adamantly knew I was a girl. But that's beside the point. My Mom just wanted a happy child, and didn't push gender issues. I played with what and who I wanted to play with. It is in fact like this on most reservations and Native American communities that govern themselves when it comes to transgender/gender non conforming children.

Had I not lost my Mom when I was six, or even if I had family left on the rez and was able to grow up there I'm quite confident I would have transitioned at puberty, and avoided years of misery and despair.

Allie :icon_flower:
Allyda
Full Time August 2009
HRT Dec 27 2013
VFS [ ? ]
FFS [ ? ]
SRS Spring 2015



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Ahlexandrah

I have been a transgender child aswell. This was the best thing I could have done because of that choice I didnt develope the very masculine parts of my body. I have not taken T blockers before I was 16 so that means that I have also received my HRT already when I was underage (everything started at the age of 16). This is the legal point in my country where it is allowed to start. I wish I would EVEN have done it earlier because I always knew crystal clear that I am transsexual even at the age of 7 . So my opinion simply is, if the child is very sure about it, support it and let it go further to prevent very high damage. Because as older you get as less effective the HRT changes are in my opinion to overwrite the already existing stuff your body has developed. I regret no choice according to my transsexuality and I would have even went for the sexual reassignment surgery when I was underage (but thats not possible here). So thats simply my opinion about it, and I guess my results show off.
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JourneyFromConfusion

I'm with you on the part of the transitioning at a very young age. However, I don't agree with social transition being permanent except in cases where the family lives in a small town. If you live in a metropolitan city, there are probably multiple grammar schools around that the child could attend. So, say a child born female transitions socially to male, goes by male pronouns and name. Then, as they get older (about 6th grade), they realize that they're not wanting to be a boy anymore. Instead of dealing with the trauma of having to have kids go "But you went by this name" blah, blah, blah, they can transition to a new school (or even be homeschooled) to allow them to live out their new found identity. Please realize with this situation, I'm talking about the child has been in therapy, the parents have communicated well with them, etc. Not one of those "today I'm a boy, tomorrow I'm not" things. We all change as the years go by and to say that one cannot socially transition because they may not necessarily want to be this way later, is wrong in my opinion.

Now, in terms of a child taking hormone blockers to delay their puberty, that's where my opinion differs. While I haven't heard of any adverse affects of this, I'd have to make sure my child was serious about wanting to be seen as the opposite sex before I did this. The only reason is because of the fact that it's been shown that many LGB members may experience gender dysphoria as they find their sexuality so we don't want to dump the hormone blockers on every child that displays dysphoria. Again, if the parents know their child well enough to see that this will help them, then by all means do it. But I'd hate to see the child in a situations where their puberty is delayed, then they get upset at feeling as though they look so young...Of course, this is just stuff that comes to my head when I think of children transitioning. I could kind of take either side on this, but doing permanent changes to a young child, is, in my opinion, wrong.


Edit: Since we're adding experience...I actually felt I should've been born male when I began puberty. however, I felt little actual dysphoria until later on. I wasn't depressed when I got my period (quite the contrary because I thought I was "mature". Lol) or when I got breast. It wasn't until I was about to start high school that I realized I coudln't take the torture of being seen as female anymore but adult me wonders if that was because I was starting to become attracted to females. all in all, I actually must've been preaching that I hated being a girl more than I can remember because I remember my mom telling me when I was about 9 that she was scared I was transgender after I expressed awe in a show about transgender youth (lol). I personally had no use for blockers because I didn't quite understand anything at the time.
When the world rejects you, learn to accept yourself. Self-love and acceptance are two of the hardest things to acquire, yet put everything in the universe into perspective when it is achieved.
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Jaz650

I am a success story of an underage kid stopping puberty. My dad supported me in taking hormone at about thirteen. At sixteen he supported me in getting by birth certificate changed. I am now twenty two still have my dad's support, he is flying with me to SRS in February. He also payed thousands of dollars for my hair removal at fourteen. I support trans kids transitioning as early as possible, why make them grow into their wrong body? Before stopping puberty I was on drugs and suicidal.


You must be true to yourself, in order to be true to God! - Jaz
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