Interesting article on the loss of privilege in transition:

http://www.autostraddle.com/hello-estrogen-farewell-heteronormative-privilege-8669/

so sad they had go through all that... thanks for posting

Yep. My wife and I had been together for well over a decade when I transitioned, so I *know* nothing changed about how we treat each other in public (and we're not into PDA, so I'm talking leaning on each other, hand-holding,  the occasional quick peck on the lips), and yet now we get a lot more second looks than we did before. And it seems like the assumptions are about 70% we're "sisters" and 30% "lesbians," whereas before we were always assumed to be married. Now, if we go out to dinner with a male friend, the waiter sometimes thinks one of us is married to HIM!

I like being seen as a lesbian, but I don't enjoy that we did lose that hetero privilege.

Great article,

Wow, something my wife and I have yet to face.  We've talked at length about this already, how people will probably have less of a problem with my transition than with us being married.

Yes it was an adjustment now being seen as a lesbian couple. On our last road trip when we stayed overnight at a hotel, they would assume double beds and we would tell them a single queen and get that look of surprise. In the NYC area we are pretty comfortable holding hands in public, but when we visit down south in TN, we don't feel comfortable with it, but hopefully that will change in time.

That's an old article but pretty good.  She's also got a good one on huffington post:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/annika-penelope/10-things-i-wish-id-known-when-i-started-my-transition_b_2698504.html
10 things you should know pre transition.